I have a friend named Sharon. She thinks a lot about what will happen with her remains after she dies. She has a bug phobia, so burial is absolutely out. She is afraid of fire and so doesn’t want cremation just in case she could feel it.
Her solution is to be wrapped in a comforter and placed in their deep freeze. She is cool with being frozen. She has even set the chest freezer up the way she wants it, with a tablecloth, candles, and a memory book of favorite photographs. She took pictures of the set-up and had prints made for her husband, who will be in charge of doing all this.
I love Sharon and do not wish death on her, but on the other hand I’m curious about what will happen.
In some cultures, at many points in history, burying honored dead with valuables was how those left behind provided for that person’s comfort in the afterlife. Including, at times, killing and burying wives, horses, dogs with the deceased. Perhaps the modern custom is a faint echo of that impulse.
Hah! No. She is funny. Her husband lost the end of his left pinkie finger in a work related accident. He received a small settlement (I think it was $10,000). When she gets drunk she tells people her husband is a pussy because he refused to cut off the end of his right pinkie for the cash.
Sharon should check with County and State laws and regulations. If she’s within city limits, there could be a local law or ordinance about what is not acceptable. Just to be thorough, get a copy of the filed tract map that shows her subdivision lot. On the first page of the tract map, there could be some rather stringent stipulations. Look for any mention of the tract having “Codes, Covenants, and Restrictions.” Yep, more rules. And those are VERY binding.
Finally, see what local law enforcement thinks about the whole get-up. Five, ten, twenty years from now, the local police could be doing a perfectly legal search of the premises, only to open that old freezer in the basement. Gah! A descendant could get handcuffs and a jail cell just until the situation is figured out.
There was a huge interest in freezing dead people in the hopes one day they could be thawed out and revived. One company was located in Southern California. Supposedly, when making future popsicle arrangements for yourself, you’d purchase an insurance policy payable to the company when you die. This step occurs after you’ve already signed on the dotted line and paid for the body retrieval, preparation, and freezing compartment. The insurance money is to pay for “perpetual care.”
Sort of.
The company went out of business, and the staff must have snuck away. The power bill went unpaid, and well, you know. Families were not notified, and it was a mess. Figuratively and actually.
Yeah, it’s a bizarre notion, for sure. I prefer the Navajo views on it. Their belief in the spirit is strong and once it leaves, the body is meaningless and is buried with all haste. Don’t get me started on the bizarre custom of viewing the remains.
I’ve lost both parents, both siblings and one of my children. The corpse is just that. The life that made them who they were is gone. The rest is just leftovers.
Jewish funerals are not open casket; but the family can privately view the body.
My sister needed not to see our parents’ bodies. I needed to see them. Can’t explain why; but I needed to. Neither my sister nor I criticized the other’s reaction – people vary.
In Florida, they have to have a certificate from a medical examiner prior to any cremation - presumably for just that reason.
If she’s buried in a modern sealed casket (and aren’t they often enclosed in an outer vault?), bugs will not be an issue.
If I were her husband, I’d smile and nod and agree to the asinine freezer idea, then once she shuffles off, do whatever I damn well please. Funerary arrangements are for the survivors, not the one who died.
I went to an open casket funeral when I was 11 or so. It was more of a curiosity than anything (I was a weird kid).
About 20 years ago, I was involved in helping friends arrange the funeral for their infant son. SIDS.
It was open casket.
I caught everyone I knew among the attendees, before they went into the chapel, to warn them. Several were from a Christian background, where this is more common; several others were Jewish, where as noted, it is NOT routine.
I’ve been to a few funerals. They’ve all been open casket.
Even a mother and baby in the same casket. Now that was disturbing. It was a case of gas leak in the house. Very shocking and upsetting. Of course.
I’ve never been to a funeral that was closed casket.
Except,
I was very small when my Mother died. Daddy didn’t let us see her dead. But apparently they had a viewing, just closed the casket at the service in deference to all us kids. I remember it upsetting my oldest brother. And Daddy trying to explain why.
I used to think children shouldn’t be at funerals because of all that.
I’m not sure anymore.
If I think of myself. I certainly wouldn’t want my grandkids upset or scared. But who am I to deny them one last look.
I just don’t know.
That’s one reason I’m not interested in attending.
ETA: my mom took me to the funeral home when her grandmother died, and then two weeks later when her grandfather followed. My only memory from that age (under five) is seeing the dead.
