So I’m listening to the radio this morning and a guy calls in and proceeds to tell the D.J. how he was at a bar over the weekend; he got to talking with a girl there and the girl says to him “your voice sounds very familiar” HE then quips “oh thats becuase I’m a D.J. on the radio” this of course was a flat out lie. The whole reason for him calling this particular D.J. is becuase thats who he was pretending to be. Anyhow one thing led to another and he winds up taking this girl home and then you can pretty much guess the rest. After all was said and done he finally fesses up and tells her he is not really who he said he was. She then storms out steaming mad.
So what do you think was this a form of rape? I’m especialy intrested in a womans point of view on this.
I realize this could probably go in GD but I really don’t want to debate. I’m just intrested in your op.
I don’t think it’s rape. How many other types of lies do men tell to get women into bed? This is just another flavor. I’m reminded of my airhead roommate who got suckered into telling a fake phone-survey guy what kind of panties she wore.
I wouldn’t call it rape, just manipulation. I’d be pissed too, I’m sure. But on the other hand, she should be glad she didn’t find out afterwards that he was a serial killer who lied to women to get them to sleep with him so he could kill them afterwards.
I’m talking a form of rape. My thinking here is if MR. 27 years old convinces MS. 15 year old to have sex with him its called statitory rape. The girl in the above mentioned did not consent to have sex with Joe Blow she consented to have sex with MR. D.J.
Actually we just covered this in my criminology class. In terms of statutory rape “force” is constructed by the state. The logic goes that anyone under the age of 18 is not capable of making an informed, rational decision, so therefore anyone over the age of 18 (playing a little loose with actual law here) is inadvertently “forcing” themselves upon someone who is, in a legal sense, naive. It would be kind of like having sex with someone in a coma.
The girl who was lied to would have a hard time proving any form of rape in court, because plenty of people have been lied to to get sex (“I love you. No, really!”), and this is just a really sleazy example. She might be able to get him in civil court, but not criminal.
I wouldn’t consider this case an example of a form of rape, although the guy involved must be a Grade A creep.
I can imagine impersonation scenarios which might be more fairly considered a form of rape, but they would have to involve a much deeper betrayl. I am thinking of something like a man who impersonates his twin brother in order to get the brother’s faithful wife into bed. But such scenarios are thankfully farfetched.
This is rape, or at least a lesser and included offense of rape. Rape is sex without consent, and as a general rule, consent obtained by fraud is invalid. We take as assumed for the purpose of the illustration that the misrepresentation was material; that is, the victim would not have consented absent the misrepresentation. Getting a jury to convict is another matter, but as far as I’m concerned it meets the pleading requirements.
Most states have, thankfully, dropped the requirement of “force” from their rape definitions. Apparently Asylum still lives in one of those backwoods places that hasn’t. It’s a shame that we’re still teaching people that rape requires force. It doesn’t.
She consented without coercion, so I don’t see how it was rape. If someone classifies that as rape, then they have to consider it rape if:
Someone has sex with someone because they claimed to be richer than they are.
or
Someone has sex with someone because they claimed they loved them.
or
Someone has sex with someone because they lied about their past sexual experiences.
How far do you take it? “I wouldn’t have been attracted to her had she not been wearing that stuffed bra, she raped me your honor!” Or “He seemed like a nice guy but he turned out to be a jerk?” “I never would have screwed her had I known she was married, I’m pressing rape charges?”
Claims that this is rape do nothing more than weaken the seriousness of the word ‘rape’. I think there is a fundamental difference between having sex with someone against their will and tricking them to make them want to have sex with you. The latter can still be sleazy at certain extremes, but it can also include stuff almost all of us have done.
This woman’s problem is that she chose to have sex with someone she was not attracted to because she thought he was a celebrity. Now, if the guy promised her a job at the station in exchange for sex, maybe she’d have a civil suit against him for breach of contract, though I find it unlikely. If she was really that traumatized by having sex with a non-famous average guy, maybe she could sue him for the therapy bills. It’s not rape, though.
Kelly M, thank you for blasting me in a completely unwarranted fashion. If you disagreed with what I had to say all you had to do was say “I disagree” or “you are mistaken.” Instead you decide to make a derogatory comment towards my home and education. In my “backwoods place” we are taught common courtesy.
However you made me wonder if maybe I was wrong so I did a little research. I could find nothing to contradict what I said. Here’s the law in your home state.
In the case of the person indicated in the OP they did give consent under the definition of any state or federal law that I could find. Nothing I saw led me to believe that what I said was false.
If you have information that would prove me wrong than I urge you to post that instead of slander.
It was the woman who first stated the man’s voice sounded familiar (thereby setting the chain of events in motion) and it was the woman that agreed to have sex based on the belief she was sleeping with a celebrity (thereby being the direct agent of the action). By my reading the woman was the primary guilty party in the rape and the man was, at most, an acessory. Considering the difficulties of proving the case from external evidence, the court will probably let him plea bargain if he agrees to testify against her.
Why, yes, I am being ironic. I can’t think of any more rational response to a situation like this.
Holy crap Nemo thats like saying "well its your fault I fucked that girl honey cuz you introduced me to her as your best friend, if you wouldn’t have done that I would have never cheated on you. "
It’s obviously not a rape…not even remotely related. She agreed to sleep with this guy and wasn’t constrained in any way.
Actually, I totally agree with searching the truth : someone who sleep with someone else just because she believes he’s a celebrity deserves to be lied on. I don’t like liars, usually, but I dislike snobs much more.
So a guy puts on a dress goes to a bar, meets a guy who thinks he is a she, they go home, man with a dress gives unsuspecting guy a blow job, then gets up and says suprize to the unsuspecting guy as he raises up his dress. Now you mean to tell me that the unsuspecting guy hasn’r been violated? C’mon.
Hey! Sounds good to me! A blow-job is a blow-job! As long as he doesn’t want me to return the favour, and I am able to silence all witnesses!
But seriously, like Badtz Maru put it: you cannot consider it rape just because he wasn’t what she thought. The girl decided to sleep with the man and then afterwards changed her mind.
So she thought he was famous and slept with him just because of that? Well, boohoo, perhaps she’ll check her facts next time.
Without wanting to sound heartless and sexist, I can admit to having slept with girls I wish I hadn’t - the “beer goggles” made them seem a little more palatable, if you see what I mean (they were probably suffering from the same effects, in all fairness :)). But I can’t wake up the next day and say “Ugh! I only slept with you because I thought that you were beautiful. You fooled me! Rape! Rape!”
Similarly, what about when you get involved with a girl only to find out she has a kid at home? It’s happened to me, so I know: I wouldn’t have slept with her if I’d known she had a kid, as it’s risking getting more than you bargained for. Was I raped?
And just to make it clear I’m not on some anti-woman rant here, what happens when a girl goes out with a guy because she thinks he’s a great guy, but after, say, 10 years of marriage, realises he’s a creep who she’d never have given the time of day to if she knew what he was really like. Does that mean she was raped for the whole marriage?
Basically, in the case of the radio guy: he lied, she fell for it. He’s a sneaky b*stard, but she’s a self-confessed prostitute if the only reason she slept with him was because she thought he was famous.
Wheather or not this guy is MR.D.J.or not MR. D.J. is a fact. Wheather or not if a guy is nice or a jerk is an opinion If you knowingly lie about the facts; its a violation IMHO.
And yes it most certainly does work both ways. As far as the women with the children thing goes.