I think I’d like it except I’d need to be more than three times my present strength and speed. Any teenager could overpower and/or outrun me; I’d have to live off of people older and more feeble than me and there ain’t all that many of them. I doubt their old, enfeebled blood would provide a lot of sustenance, so I’d have to snuff a bunch of them and that would further deplete the food supply. If I could be transformed into a young—say mid-twenties—vampire, I’d go for it in an instant. I would sleep days in a dark room and go hunting at night. The money I’d take from my victims would be enough to keep me clothed and sheltered, especially if I decided to take up mass murder for a month or two. I think there would be a lot of fun to be had as a vampire; there are several people I’d like to bite.
One question:
How do vampires pay taxes? Doesn’t the government notice at some point that there’s a guy on the rolls who’s been paying up for 200 years?
For myself, for the first year or so I’d don a black cape and mask. Then I’d fight crime during the night! I assume I’ll have extremely sharp senses?
This isn’t really for a moral reason. I just think it’d be hilariously amusing to see the confused look on criminal’s faces when they realize there’s actually a caped crusader chasing them down who happens to be immune to bullets. Plus, I’d even do mysterious night-time rendezvous with the police chief and let myself be caught on cameras.
Sounds terrific to me!
I would set up two homes,one close to each pole and commute seasonally.
I would set up some sort of blood bank business and drink the left overs.
I would imagine that vampires look after each other like freemasons plus being immortal wouldn’t be short of a bob or two,so that I’d ask them for a loan.
1.) Set up Lairs in various parts of the world, with Dirt From My Home Country, or whatever is needed. Make them tough, waterproof, and fireproof, and be sure you can lock them from inside.
2.) Save all that money from my victims in separate bank accounts around the world.
3.) Keep one lair near a conflict center, so I can have ready access to victims. Nobody’s going to notice one extra death in a war zone.
4.) Keep extra plasma and dried blood concentrates on hand.
5.) Engage ina business where I don’t have to show up, especially during daylight hours. Internet businesses are probably the best.
6.) Network with my fellow hip undead. It’s always good to keep informed about what’s going on, or where I can get a good and reliable minion. Madhouses are so passe.
7.) Avoid that Goth look, New Orleans, Willowy appearance, and anything else that screams “vampire!” You don’t want to look like a poseur. Besides, it makes it easier to sneak up on victims. Nobody expects a chubby vampire with no fashion sense.
I think CalMeacham has got it about right, the only thing I can currently think to add is moving around and changing identities every 20-30 years to avoid suspicion.
Go for middle managers. Absolutely no one will notice.
Cal, In the very first episode, Buffy picked out a vampire because of his lack of current fashion sense (“What’s with the clothes? You look like Debarge!”)
You’re missing the point - see the italicized word. I’ll bet he was fashionable for when he died.
But nobody’d expect the guy with the Patriots jersey and the “Boob Inspector” cap to be a predatory undead.
The nice thing about me becoming a vampire is with my complexion, no one would notice right away. I probably wouldn’t even have to change makeup shades or anything. No more freckles, though, huh?
I know a lot of vampires pine for the sun, but it’s overrated. Oh sure, it’s nice and shiny, but it already damages my skin at times even with sunscreen, so it’s not like the vampire thing about avoiding direct sunlight would be a huge change. I don’t think I’ll mind the whole creature of the night thing too much. Once I’ve gathered enough money, I guess I’ll be wintering in Barrow, Alaska.
I guess I’d make friends with a butcher, because I can’t see myself hunting people. Maybe if I found some guys who wanted to give blood…but only if I could trust myself not to drain them.
Maybe I could be the first vampire author. Imagine how long and involved a novel series could be if the writer wasn’t going to die.
One of the questions I have is this: will being a vampire be a barrier when trying to adopt? There are some vampires that can have offspring of their own (it happens occasionally in the Anita Blake series, but not females. In Dragonfly, the Hollows series and the Cal Leandros books vampires have offspring as a matter of course) but not in Buffy. I don’t have kids of my own yet, so I’d hate for this to keep me from adopting too. It’d be nice to take in hard to place kids and raise them right. I bet behavior issues are easier to deal with if you can threaten to drink their blood, too.
And what about marriage? It’s not legal for vampires to marry in the Sookie Stackhouse series. Is it okay as long as I marry a male vampire, or are we going to be hit with stuff like “marriage is supposed to be between a LIVING man and woman!”? Oh, and would we be able to marry someone we’ve turned, or is that like incest?
Buffyverse vamps don’t necessarily dress oddly, though some of them get stuck in whatever fashions were current at the time they were turned. Angel explained his personal preference for blacks & dark greys as making it easier to match, since obviously mirrors were useless to him. It was never clear to me how he and Spike managed their hair, though.
I’m counting Kennedy as the full girlfriend, insecure and jealous; and Buffy as the fractional, bitchy girlfriend, since she and Willow do everything BUT kiss & have sex (and, despite Willow’s claims to the contrary, I still think that if Buffy were to express an interest for either of the latter, Willow would injure herself getting out of her clothes).
In in-story terms, the re-ensoulment isn’t easy; the orbs necessary to recapture the souls are rare, as as witches capable of performing the spell. The first time Willow does it, it’s clear that she gets some outside help from some supernatural source (I’m betting it was Jasmine) who needed Angel ensouled. Note that the second time Angel had to get his soul back in, Wesley, who has some small mojo of his own, didn’t even attempt to try it himself.
Nope. However, though they can’t drown, Buffyverse vamps obviously find inhaling water extremely unpleasant.
Vampires can die from fire as well, and should think that ambient heat capable of setting wood aflame would also set their undead flesh aflame.
Well, with money getting pigs blood or other blood should not be too much of a problem. With 3x strength and speed, I’d make it big in the UFC quickly, stay 10 years or so, retire to running MMA clubs. Then do the pass it all on to myself as my son thing for centuries.
I actually wrote a fanfic with just about this premise.
My character’s occupation was phlebotomist (can you imagine just how good a vampire phlebotomist would be?) ; there is a condition called hemachromatosis that is treated by drawing blood on a regular basis. They used to not be able to use this blood in the blood bank, although I think they have changed that condition since I wrote the story. So, all the human blood I could drink, guilt-free and I’d be doing a service at the same time. Like others in this thread, I’d probably prey on criminals (in my case, I’d troll for rapists) for the thrill of the hunt and spending money. Before you protest that I’d have a soul - I’d probably do something like that now without the whole vampire thing as long as a) I was somehow outcast from normal life and b) I was significantly stronger than other humans.
An idea I had to get around not being able to see yourself in the mirror: webcam and laptop!
The mirror problem, as I see it, is more about giving away your secret than anything else.
Christopher Moore actually addressed this in a couple of his books, Bloodsucking Fiends (A Love Story) and the sequel, You Suck (A Love Story). Number 1 on the list is “Get a minion”. You need someone to run the day time errands – rent an apartment and so on. It helps if your minion(s) doesn’t mind an occasional sip of blood being taken.
As for the whole “Venus” thing, though, it’s pretty well established that fire kills vampires. So being in a place where lead melts might not be as entertaining as advertised.
Not sure that worked out too well for them in the long run, though.
No they are not. The then owner of the Magic Box says Orbs Of Thessela are quite common, and rather cheap. He uses his as a paperweight. The problem is that the ritual is lost. Without proper instructions (fragments in some dead language or another survive), the orb is just a hunk of glass.
Back To The OP
As a night person, I’d adapt pretty well. The real quandry would be wether kashrut laws still applied to me. I expect in a city as old as Philly, there would be an established vampire community and I would just need to find a mentor to get advice on finances, all night butcher shops etc.
First - I’d come out of the “closet” as quickly and publicly as I could. I understand the desire to fly under the radar, but so long as I’m doing that, any group that wants to kill me, from demons to vigilante vampire hunters to governments, can do so without consequence. Sure, I can try to hide from them, or fight them off, but I’ll be new at this whole vampire thing - I wouldn’t want to count on my ability to do that. (Besides which, Buffyverse ensouled vampires might as well have giant blinking signs over their heads - they’re prominent targets).
Hiding is unlikely to work, fighting those who mean me harm is unlikely to work - so I do the same thing that normal people do: I count on our institutions to keep me safe. I go to a major university, or the NHS, and hold a press conference. I announce that I will attempt to lead my life as normally as possible, but will make myself available for (non-invasive) scientific experimentation. Since I’m a law student at a particularly liberal, hippy sort of law school, I have a lot of friends in public-interest law - I ask them to help me fight my various legal battles to stay out of custody, maintain my right to vote, etc. And above all else, I work with friends in the nonprofit sector to make sure that I stay in the press, so that a stink can be raised if I disappear - much as democracy activists do in authoritarian regimes, actually.
As for food? Butcher shops, easy. In fact, that’s the payoff of my strategy - by putting myself in public view, and staying there, most of the other difficulties associated with my condition become moot. I mean, anyone who wants to can buy blood from butchers - if a butcher doesn’t want to sell me to me on account of my medical condition, I take him to court and try to make new law. I’d actually enjoy that. 
My partner and child would not be surpried that I stayed up all night.
They might, however, be surprised that I started eating meat.
Just sucking on meat.