Panel 18
Julia’s eyes are now open and she is looking groggily up at Susan and Jerry.
Julia: Susan…Jerry…what happened to Father Damien? He told me that Mother Mary was coming to take me to Heaven.
Jerry: Mary can’t help you, julia. No woman can. Only Jesus Christ can wash away your sins.
Diogenes, nice touch with the priest’s name!
panel 19
The three are interupted by a raging Ms LeFay She is enraged in that way that only heathens can be in a Chick tract. She is dragging in a confused Burt Ward
Ms LeFay Stop! You must leave our sister alone! Her “husband” has come with me to tell you to leaver her alone!
Jerry and Susan: Husband?!?!
** Ms LeFey**: Yes! Under the rules of WAMBAMAG any male that touches our temple is automatically concidered our husband under the great Matriarch!
Burt Ward Uhh sure…**
Panel 20
Julia :No! He doesn’t love me, as the Bible says a husband should love his wife*. Lord, thank you for letting Susan and Jerry show me real love, that of Jesus! Lord forgive my sins!!! (Weakly) Now I finally know what it means to be a REAL woman.
*Ms. LeFay and Burt have those surprise/shock lines coming from their mouth, and do the typical astonished Chick humiliated groveling on the floor, (Sparky just disappears POOF!)demonstrating in typical astonished Chick fashion how evil can’t stand before the might of the faceless God! *
Jerry : Praise the Lord!
Susan : Julia, how wonderful ! Julia?
*Ephesians 5:25"Husbands love your wives, as Christ loved the church.
Grumble, grumble, grumble. You’d think by now I’d have learned to preview, but noooooooo! I meant to add the following
kingpengvin I hadn’t thought of bringing back LeFay and Ward but thanks! I had wanted to do a groveling scene somewhere, but was having trouble figuring out how to include it. A bit clunky on my part, but Chick tracts aren’t known for smooth style, HAW HAW!
Panel 21
Julia has now expired. Her soul is exiting her body into the waiting arms of a very male angel. Susan, Jerry, Ms. Lefay and Burt Ward are arranged in a circle around the bed, holding hands and praying.
Julia: Where are we going?
Angel to your eternal reward.
Susan: [praying in a thought balloon] Thank you, Lord, for giving us time to save Julia…now if only Jerry would propose, I promise to be an obedient and loyal wife…
Jerry: [praying] Lord, please remove my perverted lust for other men so that I may be a proper husband to Susan.
Ms. Lefay: [praying] Lord, please remove my sick lust for women so that I maight make proper and dutiful Christian wife…
Burt: [thought balloon] Hmmm…that Susan chick is kind of hot…
(Sparky has reappeared, grinning behind Burt Ward)
Panel 22
Bob (Of course he’d show up!) is standing there with an acussing finger pointed at the reader. He has his other arm around a blushing Jerry in a macho friendly sort of mannor (Who am I kidding)
BOB: The Lord said he was the only way and only through Him! Your duty as a Woman is to serve him and all men! Will you surrender your free will, your jobs, and single lifestyles to serve or will you die in your sins as strumpets and vile women? It’s up to you! Of course you can’t weasle out can you Nope better straighten up. Isn’t that right Jerry Poo?
JERRY: You bet my ass sweetie!
by the way if you don’t have an idea what Good ol Burt looks like these days goHere
I will be watching the movie… I’m a Bat fan
Epilogue and check box
Ms. Lefay gave up her sinful ways, and now, as Sister Morgan, gives lectures on how YOU TOO can be freed from Homosexuality!
Jerry and Susan did finally get married, after Jerry realized Bob was only really interested in his soul. Susan tells Jerry that it’s just a coincedence that Jerry Jr. looks like Robin from the old Batman TV series.
Burt was dragged off to Hell by Sparky, who was heard to mutter to himself “this one ought to count as two!”
So, as Bob asked, will you accept the role your gender forces on you? Will you women submit to those foreordained to be your masters, and will you men accept these women as willing slaves?
Will you acknowledge this obedience(sound of whip tapping on boot) as the only way to be saved? Good!
This tract has been great.
Diogenes , I can’t decide if the “Jedi Vulcan” panel from the first tract, or your Panel 21, from this tract, is my favorite. There’s been a lot of zingers in all three. I wish I had the talent you and kingpengvin have at this. I’m more of a second banana that hands the straight lines to someone else. This has been fun!
Hillarious! Although that last one was a little over the top.
What about a tract about people that are against Chick Tracts? Hi funniess potential IMHO.
I just read the tract “Scream!” checkout the 2nd to last panel, Bob looks downright satanic in that one!
Well I assume Baker is finished with this… I’m tired too… I say we let this slip into limbo and we can dredge it up again next time someone has another idea… Unless someone has one now?
I love BioHazard’s idea of a tract on how evil people are who hate tracts.
{No, I’m not following you around the board, BioHazard. It is entirely a coincidence that we are also posting in the ‘a’ thread! 
}
If **BioHazard ** and sperfur want to do one I’ll go along with whatever idea they choose. Otherwise, kingpengvin was right, we may need to let this one rest a while. It takes at least three, or better, four, to do a good one.
BioHazard , they all went over the top in their own ways, but didn’t we have fun? If there is a next time, we’ll have to decide beforehand if we do one and be absolutely as true to Chick(shudder) as possible, or if we put our own little twists on it.
I think we should give a rest for a while, too. We don’t want to milk it until it isn’t funny anymore. Maybe once we’ve had a chance to forget all about it, we can resurrect this thread and do another tract.
PS, Baker, you’re no second banana. Your contributions were great, and thanks for being a great audience, too.
I just noticed the Retrocrush banner (bottom of the page) has a guffawing Jack Chick demon, complete with “HAW HAW”. There is a third “HAW” but it’s covered up by Betty Page.