I’m curious if other creative-types deal with this, and how they persevere through it.
I engage in a creative pursuit that started as a joyful hobby but has had some moderate success as a marketable thing. With this success comes the pressure of deadlines, either self-imposed or (more often) external - “I must make so many widgets before this upcoming craft show!” or “I must finish this commission in a timely manner for the person who is waiting for it!”
The problem I’m having lately is that I’ve come to associate the creative pursuit with the stress of the deadlines and the stress of competition and performance, and it’s sort of sucked the joy out of engaging in this pursuit. Any time I feel like going and working at it, I have this stress reaction where it feels like an obligation and a stressor hanging over me. This makes me avoid the whole thing, and I’m finding myself procrastinating and avoiding working at it for weeks at a time…and when I do, I’m only working toward a specific result, not just freely engaging in it for the joy of it.
Ultimately, I am more excited and motivated when staying busy and having success with this pursuit - it keeps me on my toes, seems to nurture creativity and innovation, and feels much more rewarding than just sort of casual toiling away at a creative hobby. But I feel like I really need to reconcile this whole stress/obligation/“work” reaction with the joy of just engaging it and working with it.
Do other people feel this way? How do you make it work?
Frankly, this is why I think “do what you love” is a bit overrated. The only thing I ever got for having my hobby as a job, was hating my hobby like a job. In the end, I got a job that was a job, and had my hobby as my hobby (after a two-year “recuperation period” in which I couldn’t stand the thought of my hobby).
I have had this same exact thing happen to me. Learned and became talented at a creative hobby which gave me much joy, then started doing it as my job, and most of the joy has been sucked out of it. Makes me really sad.
Buddy, I work in theatre. There’s never not a tight deadline. And I do love what I do, and I look forward to seeing the process and the product, and it was easier to get up for an 8 a.m. call than it is now I’m in school again taking 8 a.m. classes.
But I think that it helps that though I love my job, and I really do enjoy what I do, it isn’t my hobby, and it isn’t what I do to relieve stress, and I don’t think of it as such. After my weekly Wednesday-Thursday-Friday push, I go fishing, and hope to god I don’t catch anything, because that would break to beautiful atmosphere of standing at the edge of a lake doing nothing in particular. And I’m young, and a person who does well with stress, which helps.
I love my creative, challenging job, but I don’t think of it as a stress-reliever, and I don’t think I ever will. When I do “retire”, I’ll simply cut back and work less, and hopefully that’ll take some of the stress off without letting me end up bored out of my mind.
I’m procrastinating finishing a series of eleven paintings right now! I rarely paint for fun anymore, but I don’t hate painting. The big problem for me is that the paintings that sell on this island are the island-themed stuff, and they aren’t my best work. But the money is good, I make my own hours and work from home, and I really can’t complain. Must go paint now. Really, just one more thread.
I have lots of students who have this exact same problem.
One student is quite talented and she had done some amazing artwork. I have had her in two classes, and her problem is that she will spend hours on an eyelash and when I tell her the entire project is due soon, she gets upset because that eyelash “still doesn’t look just right”.
To stop this, I have trained her - and my other students - to knock out the completed project, in a draft version, FIRST! If it is a website, get it up and functioning - if it is an art project, get the entire picture/graphic completed and then, and ONLY then, go back in and start to twiddle and tweak and fiddle around with it until the deadline.
This has helped keep their creative juices flowing, but training them to get the brunt of the project finished and then go back in with a critical eye. They are usually far more relaxed, knowing at any moment they could turn it in “as is”, but still have the freedom to experiment and try other things without missing deadlines.
Hope some of that applies to what you are talking about.l
Actually, handling more than one project at a time is when I get some of my best ideas. You have to have several perspectives at the same time, and the combination of one project occurring at the same time as another might mean I see something I wouldn’t have otherwise. The bad thing about it is that someone else missing their deadline and affecting mine, well, that’s a short circuit, and will take me time to get back on track.
I think this is the key. It’s great having a job that lets me vent my creative juices (I’m a designer) and I chose to enter this profession because art is what I’d always loved best. But it’s a job, not a hobby. I struggle just as much with motivation as I would if I had a boring old office job. I get more out of it than a boring old office job, have genuine highs, but I still look forward to the weekend and leaving it behind.
The downside of all this is that art is no longer a hobby for me. I get my relaxation doing other things. But I don’t think that’s a terrible sacrifice.
Your trouble is that the stress of the job is ruining your hobby. You have two choices:
(1) recognise it as a job and find something else to occupy your downtime - you’ll probably feel happier in the work you’re doing and will be less resentful of the stress/hours/admin that comes with it, or
(2) stop treating your hobby as a moneymaker. Step back from the commercial enterprise, enjoy your hobby again, and find something else to make money from.
Anytime there are other people judging you there will be stress. In return you get money or ego strokes or useful feedback.
Working under hard deadlines is not often fun, but it can be a wonderful learning experience. When I look at a book of Calvin and Hobbes a lot of the beauty comes from the crunching deadlines that cartoonist live with.
The need to get material out the door encourages Zen Archer art. Watterson (and Charles Schultz and others) learn to leave out the extraneous. You don’t need five stripes to say “tiger” – three is plenty. A single brush stroke outlines a wagon and looks better than something a beginning artist spends an hour on.
And personally, I can’t barely finish anything without deadlines so I don’t hate them.
Anytime there are other people judging you there will be stress. In return you get money or ego strokes or useful feedback.
Working under hard deadlines is not often fun, but it can be a wonderful learning experience. When I look at a book of Calvin and Hobbes a lot of the beauty comes from the crunching deadlines that cartoonists live with.
Being forced to get things out the door fosters Zen Archer art. You learn to leave out the extraneous. Three stripes says “tiger” as good as five. A single brush stroke outlines a wagon and looks better than something a beginning artist spends two hours on.
After you’ve learned to be simple, you can work your way back to being finicky and be better for it.
For me I enjoy the challenge of the deadline and it makes me focus on making decisions. Design allows so many avenues to explore and on one hand I would be content just exploring them, I doubt my client would enjoy that aspect or my bill. But a deadline makes me focus and also gives me a sense of urgency which I find exciting. I also don’t look at my job as the thing that relaxes me though, as I want it to excite me. I relax by fishing or biking.
I’m a professional artist/illustrator and I don’t really mind deadlines, and high expectations, and competitions, and the pressure to always crank out quality work.
Whenever the pressures and stress of my creative work start to get me down, I just think back to when I worked in a plastics factory, or drove a cab, or clerked at a convenience store, or worked in the art/pre-press department of a printing company, or any of the other soul-crushingly shitty jobs I’ve had.
Sure, being a creative professional sucks sometimes, but I’m doing something I enjoy doing; I have to take very little shit from anyone else, and I don’t have to sign my name to anything I feel is not up to my standards (that used to drive me nuckin’ futz when I working in printing).
I can tell my boss, Jettboy, to fuck himself (and he can tell the same to the head of Shipping and Receiving, also Jettboy, who can in turn pass it on to our Human Resourses Manager, also Jettboy, and…) any time he annoys me, and I’m in complete and absolute control of my job satisfaction level. I get all of the blame if something doesn’t work out, but I get all of the rewards —including the important spiritual and emotional ones— when it does.
I get where you’re coming from. My mom and godmother do amazing things with glass, and for years we pushed them to do something with it but my mom said basically the same thing. Her health is not always conducive to meeting a deadline and she refused to set herself up for failure. Nowadays, she makes it entirely clear that for a commission piece, she’ll be done when she’s done and they will have it then and not before. She works full time (on top of the health deal) so she can take months to do something. When she has enough stuff for a show or craft deal, she signs up then. The less pressured she feels, the more stuff she cranks out.
Transistor Rhythm, I am totally with you. I have a day job, too, and I always feel like I’m on the verge of not having enough inventory for shows. I took time off from work today to complete a piece for a deadline, and ended up in “Finished is better than perfect” mode.
The only thing I can offer is that, even when I’m in heavy-duty production mode, I always try to reserve some of my time to play with techniques and experiment. For a creativity boost, I heartily recommend “Thing-A-Day,” whereby you commit to making one thing a day for the month of February. As far as shows go, Feb. is downtime, so it’s a good month to take on making a thing a day. Yes, there’s “pressure,” but not really. I’ve had a blast the last two years pushing myself and trying new things. Very energizing.
I don’t think of myself as an “artist” but a “craftsman.” And I have to say that some of the most talented people I’ve ever worked with were some of the worst to work with.
Basically, you’re not creating anymore, you’re producing to a required specification, and making one magnificient creation to your own standards is less important than making all your creations consistently good and getting them produced on time and on budget.
Some people have a gift for creation, and some have a gift for production – and one doesn’t necessarily lead to the other.