Where I used to work I had a program that could send faxes from my computer. You could adjust the number of re-tries (in case the receiving line was not answered with a fax tone) up to 99. One day, when I was getting harrassed by scumbags like these, I sent 10 faxes to their number with max retries. So they got 990 incoming calls from a fax machine that day. I enjoyed that.
Give it time, telemarketers also call cell phones even though it’s technically illegal.
Ha! Fabulous idea.
Yes, I get them. I have taken to not picking up a cell call unless I recognize the call. Our land line is just a message phone and I clear off all of the telemarketers spam every other day or so.
That’s absolutely beautiful.
Seems to me Anonymous would be doing the world a big favor by staging a few DOS attacks on these scumbags using this approach.
I’ve heard that police whistles work well also, and probably aren’t as annoying on your side. I wouldn’t bet these scumbags care any more for their slaves than for you, so I’d give it a shot.
Ever think of having a copy of Ulysses or something by the phone, and start reading it to them when they call, not letting them break in? Might be fun and educational.
No way - what if they let me get all the way thru, and I got to the “Yes I said yes yes” part? I am sure in some countries that constitutes a legally binding contract.
Safer to do Piers Plowman in the original Middle English.
Regards,
Shodan
My favorite call was the one where I finally got the guts to say:
"Oh, we’re definitely interested! My wife’ll want to hear this. Just a second, she’s in the shower."
Put phone down on counter.
"Honeeee…" Wait a full minute.
Put mouth close to receiver, yell "Honey, there’s a Roger from Card Insurance Services on the phone…"
Wait another minute.
Shout from opposite end of house: “Roger? She’s commmming…” Rinse, repeat.
A shame I didn’t have the heart to do more than four minutes, but when you’ve got someone on hold, it’s reeeeally long…
Somebody ought to say something nice about those people. Really, somebody should.
Along the lines of Ulysses, I’ve also been known to recite all of “Nick Danger” from Firesign Theater; a parody of the old detective radio dramas that runs at least 40 minutes.
But telemarketers hang up pretty quickly with this method. But I used it on the wife of a friend who claimed she was going to stay on the phone until I got her husband to leave the bar we were solving the world’s problems in.
There I was, hamming it up:“I was sitting in my office on that drizzly afternoon listening to the monotonous staccato of rain on my desktop, and reading my name on the glass of my office door: ‘REGNAD KCIN’…”
And she hung in there, ended up laughing at me, and he wasn’t in trouble any more.
And, the world’s problems? Solved.
Telemarketers don’t deserve such good stuff - I’m not sure I could do it any more, but at one time I was able to recite Nick also. In 1970 Cambridge pizza parlor owners all over time scratched their heads as college kids came in to order “pizza to go - no anchovies.”
Maybe I should memorize Lenny Bruce’s Christ and Moses - “with a cross of hmm hmm - no, not Zorro!”
If it ain’t on paper, it don’t mean a thing.