I’m really mellow about this whole sports thing these days, so only four really stick out right now:
Racewalking - I don’t mind the “whispering the loudest” aspect. Lots of sports impose artificial limits on the competitors (soccer, greco-roman wrestling, fencing, hockey, heck, every sport martial art ever). My problem is that it’s athletes making endlessly repetitive unnatural motions, with a scowling official constantly hovering by just itching to whip up a red circle the size of a freaking cantaloupe every time the walker makes the tiniest slipup. And this goes on for hours. Where the bloody hell does the concept of “fun” enter into this?
Soccer - I’ll make one concession: If the Olympics ever were to become an all-amateur spectacle again, or at least make this particular event all-amateur, it’d have its place. Otherwise, meaningless poor man’s World Cup.
Tennis - Same deal as soccer. Actually even worse because nobody even tries to pretend that this is a big deal.
Solo synchronized swimming - This…just…what the…all right, ha ha ha, very funny, good one, thanks for livening up our day blah blah etc. Now, as with that skiing in a straight line thing, let’s just acknowledge how phenomenally stupid an idea this was and allow it to die a quiet death, okay?
And since it’s come up, if I may get on my soapbox again about judged events: They have a long history, they’re insanely popular, and they’ve provided some truly breathtaking Olympic moments. These spectacles have earned their place in the Olympics. Notice I said “spectacles” and not “sports”, because they’re not sports, and, as such, should not get the same freaking awards as the actual sports. Bracelets, wreaths, necklaces, armbands, belts, whatever, fine, just something that’s not medals and, more importantly, does not get counted with the medals. Keep 'em, just put 'em in their proper place, that’s all.