I think you’re missing the point. It’s not that people are bothered by the word. It’s that using that kind of speach doesn’t make a good impression. It’s like, my coworkers and I like drinking, going to strip clubs and talking about Southpark. If someone brought that up during the formal interview, it would be held against them. On the other hand, if we take them out to lunch (as we sometimes do), it’s a little more relaxed. That is the time for colorful speech or talk about personal interests, provided you stay within the realm of appropriateness.
It works both ways too. In my first job, the interviewer was like “we like to drink a lot in this company”. I thought that was the coolest thing at 23. At 34, if an interviewer said that, I would think “this company is geered for kids right out of school” and probably, by extension, that the pay sucks, the hours are grueling and the average stay of an employee is probably 18 months or less.
In this case, part of the problem-solving is relating to all levels of our institution, from the president on down, and acceptable speech is part of that. I freely admit I am not a particularly good interviewer but luckily they’re done by group.
See, and I think people are allowed to have a facade in a professional situation. A lot of the questions I would have for someone to find out what they’re really like are off-limits. Oh, and his earring didn’t faze me at all.
Yeah, I don’t think I’d turn to GWB as an arbiter of appropriate behavior.
Believe it or not, in my conservative Southern Mama’s house, my brother and I couldn’t even say the word “lie.” We had to say “tell/told/telling a story.” I mean, really, it was like WTF?! We couldn’t say “hell,” either, as in “What the hell?”
Now that we’re in our 30’s, we can, and though we wouldn’t dare push the envelope, we did have an argument–in her presence–a few years ago where we cussed each other a purple streak. No, she was not amused.
Oh, and I can occasionally get away with the Southern pronunciation of “shit”: sheee-it. Never “shit,” mind you, but “sheee-it,” with a *very * silent “t.”
I once made the mistake of asking one of my patients if “Lordy” was Jesus’ nickname? :rolleyes:
But I digress, and sorry, but I agree that if you’re intervieving for a job (which means you are looking for work, and more money?) then show yourself in the best possible light, and challenge yourself to communicate effectively. You can show your indivualism later, right now your priority is getting food on the table and making that next Lexus payment.
That means assume your interviewer is the fucking Pope.
(Which is a pretty poor analogy seeing as he’s been pissing a lot of people off with his mouth lately!)
“Is this a God dam?” - Beavis in The Beavis and Butthead Movie
Is that what it is? My parents are from Minnesota and I live in the Twin Cities now, but we spent my “formative years” in Kentucky - and its possible that was where I picked up “white meat.” 'Cause my mother will say breast now, but I swear that was shocking for the longest time - until I went to college.
Now, when you grow up in a house where no one says “slice up the turkey breast” because breast is not a word you use in polite company or around children, the first time you get into a meeting and someone starts calling a situation a “fuck up” - well, it isn’t good when you run out of the room in tears.
I haven’t read this whole thread, so excuse me if this has been said, and this is coming from the POV of the interviewee…
If you’re going to hire me or not, based on whether I said “damn” (or shit piss fuck cunt…) or didn’t say those things, or if I have long hair and an earring, or any other criteria OTHER than my qualifications to do the job… then yours is not a company I care to work for.
Now cunt I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole. Cunt is a word that exposes me to sexual harrassment liability and THAT is a real problem even if you come into contact with ANYONE - not just “this is a client contact job.” That would have the interview end right there.
What if one of the qualifications is public speaking to a wide range of constituents with varying degrees of sensitivity, and representing your institution in a public way?
You are soooooooooo going to hell! (Yeah, Mama, that’s right–I said “hell.” *Now * whatcha gonna do about it?) (Actually, Mama would likely bust out laughing if I said this to her, and add, just for the hell of it, “Boy, hush up!”.)
And yeah, I agree. When I go on interviews, I…well, my hair is always brushed, but I wear a suit, remove my earring, and I watch my language. (After I get the job, though, the party is on!) So, even though I think the word “damn” is pretty harmless, I wouldn’t use it in an interview (or in those iffy situations where I’m just not sure of the people I’m dealing with). I would, however, think it was kinda, ummm, cool if my interviewer did, as it might reveal to me that I wasn’t dealing with unreasonably uptight people.
Yeah, as another poster pointed out, it very well could be a regional thing.
Incidentally, I don’t recall Mama having a prohibition on “breast” WRT to chicken or turkey. She was a farm girl, though, so I guess her thing was, “Well, what the hell else are you supposed to call it?” My father did, on occasion, refer to it as chicken or turkey titty, which definitely got a rise out of Mama. He was a helluva bastard, I’ll tell ya, but he always had a highly prurient sense of humor, which I am proud to have inherited.
Oh, and Daddy cussed, too, so my brother and I knew the words; we just weren’t allowed to say them. Nowadays, on the (thankfully very) rare occasion that I see him, I can cuss and not face censure.
I’ve heard people claim that cussing is an indicator of limited intelligence or a limited vocabulary. Well, for all of Daddy’s many, many, many faults, he’s actually one of the smartest men I know (with an advanced vocabulary, to boot), so that’s never necessarily followed for me.
Left the room in tears, you say? Well, I reckon that we all have our baptisms by fire.
The scene: The Cratchit home in mid-December. Tiny Tim and his mother are seated at the table. Bob is out job-hunting to better his wages.
Tiny Tim: Mum, why can’t I have an extra helping of gruel?
Mrs. Cratchit: Cos’, Tim, your Da’ won’t quit sayin’ damn durin’ the fookin’ job interview, and we have to conserve. Wouldn’t want him sellin’ out to the “establishment”, now would we? Now drink your water, and here’s a nice slice of stale bread I saved ya’ for dessert.
Now, don’t y’all get all “hot under the collar” over my poor little effort at satire, okay? All I’m saying is that sometimes you need to do what’s necessary to make a good impression, and moderate your language to fit the occasion.
I think some people in this thread have never needed a job the way I’ve needed a job in my life. Because when I’m interviewing, I’m like, “I’ll dress how you want, speak how you want, do what you want, whatever. Don’t like the earrings? Out they come. Skirt to short/long? I can change it. Need someone to make coffee/make copies/stay late/start early? I can do that. Just please for the love of God and the rent, give me a chance.”
If this thread shows anything, it’s that “damn” is not universally okay. If for that reason alone, I wouldn’t use it or any other kind of “swearing,” no matter how benign, in a job interview – I wouldn’t want to take the chance that the person I’m talking to is the only person in a tri-state area that still thinks “damn” is the hallmark of an inartciulate knuckledragger, and marks me down, be it ever so infintesimally, because of it. I’m competing for this job, and I need this job, and I’m going to be better dressed, better prepared, a better fit, and less offensive than anyone else. If it’s three months down the road and I have the job and the whole office is standing around bitching about our fucking jobs, fine; but until then – I’m an angel, baby. But the whole, “if they don’t like it, I don’t want to work for them anyway!” thing – that’s somebody who doesn’t really need the job, right there.
Ooooh, Lawdy! Scared of you! (And, just this once, no points off for the missing “i” between “n” and “t,” 'cause I’ve certainly had *my * share of typos!)
Reason #3,046 to belong to the Dope: You run the risk of encountering words that you don’t hear used in your everyday life. And, for the most part, people who use them correctly.
company about of about 30 people, the one or two people who don’t cuss, drink, etc. are thought of as being the oddballs.