Okay, if I want to buy disposable razors, then what I’m going to look for in the store are disposable razors. I know what disposable razors look like. I know what disposable razors look like while they’re still in their little plastic baggie of ten. And I know where I’m going to look for this item, too–over yonder next to the shaving cream, in the first aid and beauty products section of the store. What I’m not going to look for is a little black-text-on-white-background sign about seven feet off the floor that says “Razors are located in front of register #4”. I must have spent at least 20 minutes gaping at that damned display of shaving cream, then peering at the bunion removal products on the next rack with a woebegone expression on my face. “Huh–the shaving cream is right here. But there are no razors. Maybe if I circle around the aisle with my shopping cart again, they’ll magically appear–Nope, still no razors, right here with the other shaving products.” I’m sure I looked like one of those yokels who supposedly buy big tubs of Crisco and are disappointed when they get home and there’s not a fried chicken and a cherry pie in there.
Why the hell put the damned razors over in front of register #4? The only things that are supposed to be in front of the registers are magazines with pictures of scantily-clad fashion models on the covers, the Weekly World News, and candy for people with poor impulse control or small children. What’s the logic of putting the damned disposable razors off in Siberia someplace? From the store’s point of view, I mean. You put the razors and the shaving cream next to each other, and maybe someone who’s buying razors will say “Hey, you know, I could use some shaving cream to go with these.” Or, conversely, “Let’s see, got the milk, got the eggs–here’s the shaving cream! Oh, yeah, and the razors are right here, too–didn’t put that on the list, but in fact I am about out.”
Frankly, it’s not like I really like grocery shopping in the first damned place. I usually start secretly wishing I lived in Communist Bulgaria or some place where they only had one variety of each item, and it only came in one size. Don’t make this any harder on me than it has to be, okay?
Mind you, I have no idea what a Publix store is. Grocery maybe? At any rate, they probably moved them there because they recently hired a college graduate in marketing and are paying him $500,000.00 per year and this “new hire” told them that if they moved the razors over to the checkstand, then you would have to go past all kinds of other stuff to get there and you might buy something else on your way. It’s kind of the same reason that a lot of grocery stores put things like pickles, mayonaise, ketchup and mustard next to the bread isle and just inches from the hamburger in the meat department. It’s all subliminal.
You mean, did I hike all the way over to register #4 (after I eventually saw the sign) and buy the damned razors? Well, yeah, I needed razors. I didn’t fill my cart with candy bars and copies of the Weekly World News, if that’s what you mean.
Huh. They cost a buck-thirty-nine for a bag of ten. It’s a fairly small package, but it’s not like there aren’t plenty of other things in the store as small or smaller, which cost more.
Maybe they put them up front so they could try and talk some sense into you before you try and buy them, “Dear God man, what are you thinking? You need to talk to a manager before I can allow you to be that stupid”.
Well, I’m not sure about your case, but my razors cost a bit more than three thirty-nine for a gross. Mine are towards the front of the store, near the registers, and little Miss Blue Smock, so can keep an eye on me.
Razors are très weird. The other day it was cheaper for me to buy an entirely new razor with blades than it was to buy the smallest available package of corresponding blades. I find this extremely disturbing for some reason.
The same phenomenon can be seen with printers. Sometimes it’s cheaper to buy a new printer than it is to by the corresponding replacement printer cartridge.
Actually, it’s not a phenomenon, it’s a marketing strategy. Get people to buy a brand specific product, and you can charge mucho bucks for replacement parts.
I starting using disposables when I noticed it was far cheaper to buy them than anything else. I also think I was the last man on Earth to use one of those “band razor” things with the little cartridge where you flipped a handle to expose a new blade surface. Eventually, I was having a real hard time finding cartridges.
At least the cheapness of the disposables makes some sense - you don’t have to manufacture a mechanism to replace the blade, or put mounting holes in the blade, and a molded plastic handle costs next to nothing to produce.
I’d have to agree, Publix (puub’ lix) is schziy when it comes to store layout.
Want bread? No problem, what kind? Store baked donuts, pastry or bread is over by fresh meats. Brand name bread is over by where ever, I’ve never found them.
Refrigerated drinks?
OJ, left, beyond the vegtable section.
Beer, right, next to gourmet cheeses.
Milk, straight ahead, past frozen foods.
At least they have an entrance path through the check out lines instead of the walkabout constructed of impulse/special displays.
But Publix it is because I haven’t been in a Kroger for a couple a years since they carded me for a freakin’ pack of cigarettes. E’cuse me snot nose but I’ve been smokin’ cigs twice as many years as you’ve been alive!
Alright, as long as this has morphed into grocery store rants, I must speak.
Albertsons sucks. Last things first: it’s reciepts aren’t itemized. Fer instance: if I buy lettuce, apples, fresh herbs, and sun-dried tomatoes, they will all be listed individually on the reciept as “Produce”. Shrimp, ground beef, and Cornish game hens: all listed individually as “meat”. All soda is listed as “soda” as opposed to “coke” or “Stewards” or whatever. Canned veggies are “Cnnd vgtbls” regardless of whether it’s artichoke hearts or tomatoes. So when I get my reciept and try to figure out what my neighbor (who asked me to pick up some apples and ground beef and canned tomatoes) owes I get to guess which of the 8 “produce” are apples, which of the 12 “Cnnd vgtbls” are crushed tomatoes and which of the 5 "meat"s are ground beef.
Continuing the rant, in every Albertsons I’ve ever been in, the aisles are just a bit too narrow. Two carts can’t pass in an Albertsons aisle, but it looks like they can! It’s subliminally claustrophobia-induceing. It’s like an optical illusion too. You regularly see people getting stuck as they try to pass their carts alongside each other.
Third: Screwball store layouts. In the Albertsons I was in yesterday, you enter between some security gates (like they have at bookstores) and pass the deli. It forces you into the produce section. That’s normal. I read somewhere that some dimbulb thought that seeing fresh produce right away makes you buy more. Then you get to half of the bakery. The packaged breads are here, but the fresh baked stuff is on corner 3. Continuing along the back wall, you get to the seafood section. Normally the seafood section is near the meat section, which is near the deli, but not here. The meat is over by the fresh bakery. Next is the dairy section. Oh and the “ethinic food” is spread across two aisles. Some of the Mexican food, and the Chinese is in one aisle (which also has other stuff), some more of the Mexican is in another aisle with the Italian stuff.
Fourth. THREE GODDAMNDED REGISTERS? They only have 3 registers for full carts. Not “they have three registers manned”. No, I mean that they only have three physical check-out lanes. There’s another three registers for “10 items or less”. Clue guys: when there’s 5 people with full carts in each of the Full cart lanes and there’s no-one in the “10 or less” lanes, a normal store has at least one or two of the “10 or less” cashiers check full-cart people out so you don’t have 15 people standing around waiting 20 minutes to be checked out.
I rarely go, but each time I do, I’m reminded why I hate Albertsons. :mad:
Grocery stores sell shelf space to vendors. It could be that the razor manufacturers, particularly those of the cheapo brand, would not or could not pay enough to the store to justify placing their product on that particular shelf.
I know at the Publix store I shop at here in Lakeland, Florida (Publix headquarters), razors are displayed where the shaving cream is, as well as located at the checkout in the “impulse buying” section. Publix has a website and you may be able to send them a nice suggestion in their “Contact Us” section. Also, I will be playing golf with the president of Publix’s wife in the next week or two; should I mention this to her to pass on to Ed?
Well, Lucky’s was purchased by Albertson’s several months back, and all the Lucky stores have morphed into Albertson’s stores. At least around here. They ran commercials when it happened about the two chains getting “married”, but it’s clear that Albertson’s wears the pants in that family, to use an outmoded, and admittedly sexist, expression.
Supermarket chains are often regional - my world includes Raley’s and Nob Hill, too. From other parts of the country I remember Buttrey’s and King Sooper. I believe Buttrey’s was absorbed by Albertson’s, too. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if they’re eyeing Horny Bob’s … and they’ll probably figure out a stupid way to arrange the pornography.
All the Publix stores in Orlando have signs in the beer aisle for Newcastle Brown Ale. This is great because it is my favorite beer. But they never have it in stock! And when I say never, I mean never. I complained (twice) to a manager at the Publix I frequent most often (SR436 & Howell Branch Rd) but that has done no good.
Tell Ed to stock the damn beer or quit advertising it!!
Coming from Colorado, I’m discovering that Orlando is a beer wasteland. “Yeah, we have both kinds – Busch and Busch Light!” Microbrew is considered to be Busch served in a two ounce cup. An import is considered to be a beer that was brewed in Georgia. Can’t find any store anywhere that sells micros – and I’m in the MetroWest/Dr. Phillips area, too, where you would expect to find something nice. Nope. I can find fuggin’ $500 bottles of wine and $30 cigars, but no beers that weren’t brewed in 10,000,000 liter tanks. “Michelob Red Amber Brown Bock Hefeweisen Cream Ale” doesn’t count, either.
I wanna’ see a Buffalo-style supermarket in Orlando. A big 'ol Wegmans or Tops could be as much of an attraction as Disney World is 'round these parts.
