Hi everyone. I hope I’m not spamming the Internet by x-posting this here and on Reddit, but I’m kind of in a mild non-emergency panic. The Dope harbours some powerful imaginations, so I hope someone here has the time to chime in.
I desperately need help coming up with the ending (and then some) for a story I’ve been writing my son (he’s seven). TL;DR: I wrote him a page a day last year in kindergarten. It worked out very well, and at its ending it broke the fourth wall. (I wrote about it a bit here.) I started writing him again this year, but my wife’s cancer, the loss of a pet and a million other things have numbed my creativity. I need help wrapping things up plot-wise in time for the end of school.
I don’t know how to ask for help without writing out a huge amount. I made a table of contents of sorts — hopefully that will make it easy to skim through and see if any of it interests you or if an idea comes to mind.
Thank you so much for looking.
The Very Basic Background
The First Story (from kindergarten
This Year’s Story
How do I make it all tie together?
What I have to work with
Constraints
The Very Basic Background
I need help coming up with plot points/an ending and then some for a story I’ve been writing for my son. It all began last year on his first day of kindergarten. I wrote him the traditional first day of school note. Due to circumstances, I ended up writing him notes the second and third day, then the fourth and fifth … and by that time it was a small ‘thing’, and I couldn’t just stop abruptly. No plan at that time, just a fun thing to do.
From the first notes, a bit of a pattern evolved — few lines of “We love you; wasn’t last night fun; have a great day; etc.” followed by a bit of whimsy. The whimsy started to connect from day to day, then evolved into a semi-plot and then a continuing sci-fi/fantasy adventure. The saga wrapped up right at the end of school, nice and randomly on Father’s Day.
It was rollicking saga, and though it was haphazardly written in the ten to fifteen minutes before we left for the bus, its rather convoluted plot really came together at the end. The ending (came on Father’s Day) had four major shoe-drops that blew his little mind: an out-of-nowhere but makes sense plot twist, actual came-off-the-page time travel (with special effects and everything), and the appearance of an ancient treasure map that led to a six-foot tall knight two hours into the woods. It was a beautiful day.
I’ve been writing to him every day again since first grade started. But with my wife battling cancer (stage IV pancreatic with gruelling chemotherapy and two major surgeries), the loss of a beloved pet and a million big things that are tiny in comparison, this year’s story has kind of meandered. I have no solid idea where it’s going or how to end it. I have thin ideas, hints of notions and a few elements to include, but have nothing to write to.
And I’m really, really stressed about it. He’s kind of anticipating that something’s going to happen, and it hurts to let him down. It would be like giving him beige socks for his birthday.
Further, he’s on the cusp of credulity. Next year he won’t believe like the little boy who takes the reality of Santa, the Tooth Fairy and Daddy Magic for granted. He still believes in what happened last year, but just barely — he’s been asking a few questions that suggest he’s starting to pay attention to that man behind the curtain. So this is probably the last year it’ll be fully real to him, and once that innocence is gone, it won’t come back until he’s a father.
The First Story (from kindergarten)
Given the nature of the help I need, I thought I should provide the details of the first and second stories. To keep things as concise as I can, I wrote them up in bullet-like format. If you’re curious as to what they actually looked like, I had scanned and PDFd last year’s story to here.
Welcome Home Old Friend: The still patient knight
[ol]
[li]The notes all ended with a bit of whimsy, etc.[/li][li]After the first couple days, I started adding simple drawings to the back of them. This becomes a bit more important later on when the story gets to the map.[/li][li](e.g. “I’m travelling to the Jurassic period today, I’ll see if I can pick up a pet dinosaur” … “sorry, there were no dinosaurs, but I’m headed to ancient China and I’ll see if I can find a suitable dragon”[/li][li]In a sci-fi setting, a general Zarthos had elicited my help/advice in his fight against the Banatarks (the Main Bad Guys)[/li][li]While doing so, a Strange Occurrence happened, and I found myself instantly transported to a pastoral fantasy setting[/li][li]Attacked by a giant spider, a strange knight comes to my rescue.[/li][li]I am told by a council that I must fulfil my destiny by travelling with the knight.[/li][li]I have no idea what’s going on, why I was picked, etc. Neither does the council; they just follow the prophecy/legend[/li][li]I travel with the knight, encountering adventures.[/li][li]When there is no danger, the knight is silent, unmoving and seemingly hollow; I have to carry him from place to place.[/li][li]Because he didn’t move unless there was danger, it was how I could tell when I was safe. The knight never spoke (okay, he did when I first met him, but that was before I got the in-story idea to keep him silent)[/li][li]I encounter Borrinanigar Velsuth (Borin). He has been waiting for me; he is to be my guide across the Lightning Sea to the Crystal Tower.[/li][li]He first challenges me to prove who I am. First two questions relate to the house (When I meet the kids at the bus stop I usually had a bunch of lollipops. When he got off the bus, my son would ask me if “I was armed with lollipops?” Hence the in-story question “what are you armed with every day?”[/li][li]Third question launches into a tale about my past — what was the fate Rancor the Destroyer?[/li][li]The Rancor the Destroyer sub-story takes place, ending with me and my allies having tricked him into miniaturizing himself and getting covered/frozen in magic amber.[/li][li]By about the time the substory ended, my son had made the connection to this. It’s a paperweight I had made when I was in jr. highschool out of a D&D miniature (even the crack was part of the story). That reinforced the first person nature of the story and planted the seed that all this really did happen.[/li][li]Back to the main adventure and its episodes.[/li][li]Satisfied that I am who I claim to be, Borin hands me a torn quarter of a map here’s the full map as I drew it).[/li][li]The incomplete map has strange writing on it. I have no idea what it is, nor does Borin; he only knows he was supposed to give it to me.[/li][li]Another side adventure begins on the ship.[/li][li]I am pulled overboard by Scylla, a tentacled, Scylla-like monster[/li][li]For the first time in this adventure, I’m beyond the help of the knight (who has been a constant, personal deus ex machina, coming to life and saving me whenever there was danger and remaining silent, still and immobile unless I carried him).[/li][li]As I’m underwater and dragged through the bones of its previous victims, my hand finds purchase and balance on the hilt of a sword.[/li][li]The sword buys me time to escape into its submarine lair.[/li][li]Only pocket of air is at the roof; it’s made up of a vast amount one of the most powerful magical ingredients; it’s the last breaths of innocent sailors who met their doom[/li][li]Because of its source, I wont’ use that magic to free myself (trope of using evil starts down the slippery slope of evil for convenience, etc.)[/li][li]Almost caught again, I remember the sword and use it to rescue myself. I’m subsequently re-rescued by Borin and his crew[/li][li]In telling Borin how I escaped, he is shocked to see the sword — it’s not just any sword, but one that belonged to Alphonso the Wise[/li][li]In sailing on, we are overtaken by a massive, heavily armed ship (pirates? danger?).[/li][li]Ship is piloted by Farknuckle the Red. She and Borin seem to know each other, though there is significant tension between them. Farknuckle, attempting to board: “You could’t stop me — your ship has no cannons. Besides, you don’t want to stop me!”[/li][li]Borin lets her on board. More tension, but they go into his cabin to discuss. Both crews smirk. Cabin door has a strange symbol on it.[/li][li]Tension is interrupted by our arrival at the Tower in the middle of the sea.[/li][li]Tower is almost windowless except for four octagonal crystal windows.[/li][li]Tension restarts: strange craft have bobbed to the surface and are attacking/blocking our path to the tower[/li][li]Borin and Farknuckle put their rivalry aside to work together (one ship was fast but weaponless, the other heavy but cannon-laden).[/li][li]We eventually prevail, but Borin is deeply wounded[/li][li]He tells me just a little more about what he knows: in his world there had always been monsters, but there was a terrible change. New monsters from another time/dimension. It was up to me to banish them.[/li][li]Wounded Borin: “Tell me … have you ever heard of the Banatarks?”[/li][li]I’m stunned and relate how General Zarthos had asked help defending against their attack for the Black Meteor of Power (called the Time Spark here).[/li][li]Black Meteor of Power is in pieces. Trope of if they get both pieces, they’ll rule and destroy throughout time (as-is, time travel is restricted to individual and small groups moving through time; with the regrouped pieces, entire armies will be able to cross through).[/li][li]Banatarks are causing havoc here too. Only way to ask for help was to leave hints and clues throughout time until thousands of years in the future (when time travel is developed), someone would understand and send the right person help.[/li][li]And that person was me.[/li][li]I’m incredulous. The Everyman, I have no idea why I was chosen. Borin has no idea either. All they knew was that clues and hints had been sent back in time — which is why they (throughout the story) had expected me and were helping me.[/li][li]I’m to travel to the top of the tower to grasp the meteor to get sent forward in time. But in doing so, I may end time travel forever.[/li][li]I was confused about the cryptic nature of it all, but I just wanted to get home.[/li][li]At the top of the tower is Borin, Farknuckle, Borin’s strange rope-friend (side story not included here) and the knight that I had lugged all the way up the stairs.[/li][li]Door at top of tower is sealed. But I notice a strange shallow impression in its surface. It’s sword-shaped.[/li][li]Realizations: finding the sword in Scylla’s lair was no accident and the door had been magically sealed such that only I could enter.[/li][li](Only I could enter as in Borin, Farknuckle and the knight stayed outside)[/li][li]KERZAP … scene change.[/li][li]Tower had changed. What was wood was now metal. Boxes were now instrument panels. I made it to the future.[/li][li]Borin walks in. Confusion ensues.[/li][li]Not the Borin I had just left, but his distant grand-grand-etc. child. He and his ancestors had been waiting for thousands of years for my arrival.[/li][li]Was it he who left all the clues and sent me to the past?[/li][li]No. Just like before, he had little information and would tell me less.[/li][li]But he did have another map section.[/li][li]We launched into space (Tower never moved; over thousands of years, repairs and replacements, it was slowly turned into a rocket ship)[/li][li]No time to talk; incoming attack[/li][li]Banatarks again.[/li][li]More adventures in space as we travel across the galaxy to a meeting place (mostly Banatark trying to stop us)[/li][li]Borin gives a few reasons why some things are confusing:[/li][li]First, over time, archaeologists and the like were able to decipher clues from the past, but given the timespans involved, figuring them out was imperfect.[/li][li]Second, after their own scientists and leaders had finally recognized what everything meant, that the legends had referred to the Banatarks, etc., they were limited in what they could send back (knowing the exact future leads to the trope of a universe-destroying paradox).[/li][li]Third, what they could send back message-wise had to be understandable to peoples of that time (i.e. they couldn’t talk of spaceships because the clues had to use culturally relevant iconography and the like)[/li][li]Fourth, this had been going on for thousands of years in both directions, so a lot was lost in translation, affected by past and future messages, etc. (It generally explains various inconsistencies in message and plotlines)[/li][li]None of that explained how it all started (cycle of future receiving clues from the past, so the future leaves clues for the past, who on receiving clues leave things for the future, who on receiving them …). Who left the first clue?[/li][li]Still don’t know why I was chosen. Don’t know what the map pieces are. Don’t know who was behind it all. All Borin could tell me is that it will all be clear and that I’d finally make it home.[/li][li]In crossing the galaxy, Borin tells me many tales from his adventures in space and his family’s past (not told in-story, just alluded to), reinforcing the notion that time travel is heavily interlocked.[/li][li] I meet up with higher and higher ranked figures. I am stunned at the insignia of the Clinston, Arch-general of the Planetary Forces: it depicted the knight (who I had left outside the tower door)[/li][li]More space battles. Pew! Pew![/li][li]We have to travel to the center of Banatark space where the other half of the Time Spark is.[/li][li]Armada is assembled, along with other characters, etc. Knight insignia is everywhere.[/li][li]Eve of the battle, General Al-Gebra (yeah, I know), keeper of galactic knowledge is supposed to answer questions. But he doesn’t.[/li][li]It’s not him who sent me on this quest and he doesn’t know/can’t tell if he did.[/li][li]But he did have the final map section.[/li][li]We don’t get to start journey to Banatark space; they attack instead.[/li][li]Battle is bad: thousands of time-holes open and Banatarks flood the area with armies from across time and space, from primitive craft to giant battleships.[/li][li]Battle ends grimly. Borin and I barely make it out in an escape pod.[/li][li]Grimness continues. All was lost. Fortress decimated. Entire fleet destroyed. The Banatarks have won.[/li][li]Our pod is captured by a Banatark ship with mechanical, Scylla-like arms.[/li][li]Everything is silent in the wake of destruction.[/li][li]Borin starts laughing (?!)[/li][li]Borin is laughing because he understands. Borin: “Trust me, he said.” Me: “Who?” Borin: “He did. I didn’t understand it at the time, but now I know. He said you’d understand. ‘Trust me’, he said.” Me: “WHO?”[/li][li]Borin related some backstory. “I told him this was a dangerous plan. But he said ‘trust me’, and so I did. So we all did. And the battle is over; the war is lost. But now I understand he was right.”[/li][li]I don’t know who “he” is, but he’s the key to everything and the one who would make it all come clear.[/li][li]By now I’m kind of pissed about all the crypticness that’s been going on, devastated by the loss, and still desperate to make it back home.[/li][li]And who the hell is “he” that started all this and involved me?[/li][li]Amid the destruction and new ship appeared; I was about to finally meet him and get some answers.[/li][li]As the ship appeared, more and more holes appeared in space and a continuous stream of Banatarks from every time period flooded through.[/li][li]All Banatarks focused on the new ship, but couldn’t touch it.[/li][li]In all my travels to the distant future (here and otherwise) I had seen a lot, but this new ship was from an unimaginably distant future (hence it was impervious to event the combined Banatark forces)[/li][li] It took me aboard.[/li][li]A familiar-sounding voice helped me out of things and told me to come to the centre of the ship where I’d finally understand.[/li][li] Core of the ship was a time-proof room where he was waiting.[/li][li]Finally started to get answers as I made my way through the ship[/li][li]Paradox trope (and its dangers) revisited.[/li][li]“But just this once we’re going to break the rules”[/li][li]I refuse. Doing so would end time travel and I’d never get home to my family.[/li][li]“Trust me” said the familiar voice.[/li][li]So I did.[/li][li]Why all the mystery?[/li][li]“If you knew what you were about to do without meeting all the people or going through so much, would you do it anyway?”[/li][li]I understood: Some decisions and some things are only possible when resting on a foundation of friendship and experience.[/li][li]Secondly, we needed to wait for the right circumstances. What’s different?[/li][li]We were defeated because Banatarks from all time periods had gathered for this one battle.[/li][li]Ah ha. If I ‘understood’ too soon or too late, causality would break but the Banatarks would still be a malevolence throughout time.[/li][li]My ‘understanding’ was all that was needed to trigger the paradox and end the Banatark threat — and end time travel.[/li][li]Double down on refusal — want to get home to my family.[/li][li]“Of course you must; it’s related to why you’re here.”[/li][li]When time-locked chamber opens and I fully understand who it was and why I was sent back, the universe will rip asunder.[/li][li]But once I know but before knowledge and understanding sinks in (thus ending time travel), he’ll send me back to the fourth day of school, exactly where I started.[/li][li]I’d be once again safe with my family, where I could write down the adventure one note at a time this is where the legend started.[/li][li]All I had to do was follow the map when we get to the end of the story.[/li][li]#@&![/li][li]Can’t follow the map if I can’t read it.[/li][li]“Code to the map is on the back.”[/li][li]#@&![/li][li]I only sketched the front.[/li][li]“Seriously?” said the by now very familiar voice. “I’ll see to it that the map arrives safely at the end of the story, else time will end too soon. Really, you never looked at the back?”[/li][li]Almost there, and I ask my final question: Why me?[/li][li]It’s not you.[/li][li]$#@&?![/li][li]The voice said “it’s actually me. Or rather, me-through-time … one of me really lives up to the family creed, the ideal of increasing global happiness. Whether it was one act or the sum of them all together, it so changes the course of history for the better that the Banatark threat never arises. And so this entire war was fought to me from doing that. And your journey was to make sure I could. I’ll need you to follow the map and return to a place you left long ago and left something standing, waiting for me.”[/li][li]I made it to the door. Just as it opened, I understood it all, fulfilled the paradox and was whisked away back to the fourth day of school. All be cause I saw who it was:[/li][li]It was my son.[/li][/ol][ol]
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A six-year-old doesn’t expect that kind of shoe to drop (he’s a very forgiving audience). We talked about the story, ate some lunch, basked in Father’s Day, etc. A couple hours later, the second shoe dropped. BANG! BANG! BANG! from outside. I had rigged some fireworks and smoke pots on a five-minute fuse, so my wife could sneak out, light them, and be comfortably (and visibly) back inside before they went off.
Right in front of the porch was a silver bucket with coloured smoke pouring out of it. On closer inspection (and when the smoke stopped), it held a silver case. We took the case off to open it, and there was the third shoe: it was the map. Friends had carefully taken my map drawings and transferred them onto a weathered piece of canvas — complete with code key on the back.
We go back inside to decode the map. This was the fourth shoe to drop — it was a map of the house and surrounding woods.
We go out for the treasure hunt. The map has a few bits from the story (in a tangle of laurels, the map’s “Red Flag” is the Borin/Farknuckle crest from his door, “Yellow Wood” is from his ship, etc. Bits of coloured fabric are in everyone’s favourite colour, etc.). It takes a good couple hours to make our way through it all. Finally make it to the end of the map and there it is: the still, silent knight.
The knight now keeps silent watch over our parlour.
My post was too long for VB, so I’m splitting it off here and pasting the rest into the thread.
