I adopted a cockatiel who the owner said is a male and under a year old. I’ve had him for 4 days. I’m trying to figure out what’s the best way to bond with him and develop a good relationship, which includes coming out of his cage onto my finger and hanging around with me. He doesn’t know step-up yet, but that’s on my list.
So far I’ve bonded with him “from afar” i.e. sitting at the table and singing with him. We have a whistling call that we do back and forth, and he does lots of head bobbing and bowing. However, he’s petrified of me reaching into his cage (which I understand, but there’s been a few times where I’ve had to). He’s moved from hissing and backing away to staying close and striking at me if I try to give him food through the bars- he does eventually take it, but he’s afraid of my fingers, basically.
When I met him, he was coaxed out of his cage by his caretaker and sat on my finger and tasted it, and sat on my shoulder, so I know he’s capable, but I don’t want to rush him in his new environs and make him equate me with “bad”.
What are the steps I should take to gradually make him feel comfortable with being near me?
I have the feeling your answer might be “don’t move to the next step until he’s totally comfortable with the current step, even if it takes months.” Should I wait until he easily takes food through the bars before I do anything else? Should I avoid as much as possible getting into his cage or any other kind of intrusive behavior? Should I just go for it and leave his cage door open until he’s brave enough to come out on his own?
How do you convince a cockatiel that you only want to love and cuddle them??
p.s. he’s also due for a wing clipping soon, so I feel especially concerned about at least getting somewhere with him so that the trip isn’t totally traumatic.
Go slow. Your cockatiel has just moved to a new location with new people. Give him/her some time to settle in. You must first let him/her understand that he/she can trust you - that you’re not going to harm him/her. Sounds like you’re on the right track - simply spend time with him/her. He/she can be in the cage, and you can just sit and talk.
I kind of broke the ice by feeding through the cage - just a seed at a time. Sharing food is a very common behavior in the flock, and I think the simple act of giving food provides a sense of security. But just go slow. If he/she doesn’t take the food, let it go.
After maybe a week or two of somewhat minimal contact, then start working on “step up”/“step down”. Be sure to praise, and watch for body language. When they fluff out and kind of settle in, then they are comfortable (beak “grinding” is also a sign of comfort). This is a key indicator that they are “okay” with sitting with you.
After some time with being comfortable, then to really seal the deal start working on head scratches. Wait until he/she is settled (fluffed out), move slowly and pause a lot. Start with some simple head petting and then move on to actual scratching (behind the crest). Head scratches to parrots are like under-chin rubs for cats - they live for this, and will take all they can get. Once you get to this point, you will know the bird trusts you, and will start to acknowledge your affection. The downside is that the bird will likely want to be with you ALL the time - and he/she will let you know this (loudly
Parrots are very social. So get a perch and let the bird see what you’re doing around the house. He/she doesn’t have to be “on” you all the time, but will simply want to know what you’re doing (even when you’re just perusing message boards on the internet).
Cormac gave really great advice. I have had two and they were so friendly. I would say to clip the flight feathers because I almost lost one that way.
I had one that was so friendly my kids would take it out for bike rides. It would sit on the brim of their hat. Start out slow and get him to step up onto your finger and they love head rubs.
This is the part I kind of don’t “get”. How do I move from minimal contact to working on “step up”? Start with food through the bars, then move to letting him taste my finger through the bar, then work on giving food w/ the door open, then work on letting him taste my finger w/ the door open, then start to work on “step up”? And so forth?
Ha if I was just myself (pretty impatient) I fear this bird would hate me! I have a tendency to want to rush things, so something that’s “go-slow” needs to be spelled out for me, otherwise I’d be trying to take my birdie out for a bike ride on day 5! (not really, but I am rather impatient- I want him to love me, like, now!).
I think the best guide is to watch the bird’s body language and see what types of interaction it is most comfortable with. It sounds like he likes singing with you, so it sounds like he likes you, just not your hands.
What I have done for “step up” training is to take the bird out of their cage on a perch, and then take it to a small, enclosed area (like a half bath) and then work on step up training there. My birds are much more willing to step up on my hand when they are not in their territory. The enclosed space makes it easier to regain control if the bird jumps off your hand.
For offering food, are there any foods that you and the bird both eat? One strategy I’ve used there is to have the bird sit on a table while you eat a plate of that food, and if the bird starts trying to sneak up and steal the food then you can try offering some to him yourself. In any case, since birds are flock animals, it is often more persuasive if you try eating the food yourself while you offer it to the bird.
I found out he likes low-salt kasha “triscuits”- I’m going to work (slowly) on offering these or millet to him through the bars until he approaches without fear. Then I’ll work on being closer to the cage without freaking him. And then we’ll move slowly towards getting him on a perch and out of the cage and do some “neutral ground” interaction.
First, an all seed diet isn’t healthy, does your 'tiel eat pellets and fresh food, of just seed? If it’s used to an all seed diet you can remedy this later. No matter which, millet is candy to 'tiels, and is therefore the perfect training tool. Hold a piece of a sprig and be patient while it gets the nerve up to come and nibble through the bars. It is also what I used on my rescue 'tiel to teach him to trust again, to step up, and other tricks. This works best if millet isn’t a constant offering in the cage as well.
They are lovely little parrots, enjoy yours! You are aware of the Mention a Pet = Mandatory Photos rule, right?
I have budgies but I would think the taming process is pretty similar.
I got my first budgie in September from the local SPCA. It was obvious that someone took care of her as she was finger tame, but didn’t know me so she didn’t trust me.
I read everything I could find on how to tame them and I know that the common methods work but I just didn’t like them. So I took a rather unorthodox approach with her. I used the “in their own time” method. I never forced anything on her, never tried to coax her onto my finger with a treat. I tried to convey with my body language that I wasn’t a threat by not looking at her straight on, deliberately blinking and looking away to pretend I was doing something else.
I also always kept her cage open and let her come and go as she wanted, making sure everything was bird-proof. She would often go for a spin around the room and land on the floor so then I would help her back to her cage by kneeling down and offering a finger for her. Pretty soon if she’d land on the floor she’d run over to me to pick her back up and then I’d start taking longer and longer to put her back and just talk to her while she was on my finger. I’d take her over to the window to look at the birds and pretty soon she was on my shoulder watching youtube videos of other budgies.
After about a month and a half I decided that she would really enjoy another budgie so back I went to the SPCA and got a lovely male for her. Now he had spent his entire life alone in a toyless cage. Half of that time (6 months) he’d been at the SPCA where they just don’t have time to spend with a budgie, so he was completely wild and very depressed when I got him. He didn’t even know what to do with toys and just sat there with a dead look in his eyes. I’ve used the same approach with him and two days ago he ate millet from my hand.
It’s been easier with him because she shows him that I’m not scary. She’s not that interested in hanging out with me anymore now that she has her boyfriend but I’m ok with that. They’re like two little horrible flying monkeys. I had no idea that they would bring me such joy. And he’s a changed little bird now, loves all his toys and play gyms and they both like to sit at opposite ends of the play area and scream their fool heads off at each other.
Anyway I’ll stop because otherwise I’ll go on and on and on about how perfectly wonderful they are.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with the normal way to tame them but this is another way that happened to work with me.
Awww, Cricket is a beautiful pied 'tiel! My rescues were first Chicken, a male lutino, and then Nellie,a pearl hen. I let them raise two clutches, and then just kept them as companions, (they lived in separate cages). They eventually died of old age, and I miss them terribly. I would love to have another 'tiel.
If you want any help with a pellet/fresh food diet, just let me know, either here, a pm or an email, which can be found in my profile.
First, you need to have the wings clipped to work on “step up” (or as F.Pu suggests, working in a closed area - but even then a flighted bird may injure itself).
It helps to put yourself in your bird’s frame of mind: after a couple weeks you’ve learned that this HUGE giant, as scary as it is, does not make any overt indications to harm/eat you. So maybe that’s okay. Now it is forcing this big appendage toward me - time to escape !
In my experience (with non-hand raised birds), the first few days of finger training were tough. The bird’s natural instinct is to get away - fly. Hence the need for clipped wings. So you’ll do a bit of chase, but the bird will eventually tire, and that is when you can get him onto your finger. If you haven’t done this before, you need to nudge the side (not the tip) of your finger up against their belly. If they’re backed up, they will have no choice but to step up.
Big tip: biting is NOT a natural defense for parrots (escape is the natural defense). That is, this is a LEARNED behavior (as in, humans teach their birds that biting is effective). He may hiss and bite (remember, he’s terrified). So do your best not to overly react to any bites, and don’t let it dissuade you. If biting doesn’t dissuade you, there will be no need to keep biting.
Once he’s on your finger, relax. Talk softly. Praise. And just sit for a bit while the bird A) catches his breath, and B) realizes that he’s still safe. He’ll likely be anxious and jittery, and for the first few days, there is a good chance he’ll fly off. And you’ll go back to chasing him about. Only go a couple rounds each day - you don’t want to exhaust the bird or stress him out too much. But be persistent and work on this every day.
Just as with you simply being around, the bird will learn that it is safe to be sitting on your finger, and that when you want him to be there, he will need to be there (his attempts at escape are futile). There will still be the odd escape attempts, but he’ll figure it out soon enough. And, of course, if something spooks him, he’ll likely take off.
Got his wings/nails clipped today. The lady had to grab him with a towel- poor guy. She’s been hand raising cockatiels for over 30 years. She confirmed he’s a boy (did the pelvic palpation). She said he looks good and said to just go slow with plenty of millet for rewards.
If Cricket was hand fed, it must’ve been early and then he was left alone after that, because he definitely doesn’t trust humans, even the wizened old bird-whisperer who cut his wings. Poor boy. We’ll get him back!
Crow was supposedly hand raised and is, frankly, a jerk. He sings more or less on command (he’s tone deaf, but can sort of do the Imperial March from Star Wars) but after a year he still bites. He’s never been on a finger; the only way to put him somewhere is to grab one of his perches and have him step onto that. Even that’s tricky.
Raven is the opposite. She’s nearly silent, but was hopping onto fingers and shoulders and even heads essentially from Day 1. She’ll ride around on my shoulder all day if I let her, but I won’t because I don’t care for being shit on. Plus Crow goes nuts if she leaves the room.
I just wanted to underscore this-- most parrots like drama. Drama is a reward. So if your bird does something bad (like biting), and gets a big reaction, hey, that’s really cool! Conversely, if the bird does something you do like, and you make a big deal about it in a good way, that will reinforce the good behavior.
