All you polys can bring your SOs to my parties if y’all aren’t drama whores.
If there are any immature haters there who cannot handle your presence, I’ll tell them to go the fuck home.
So what happens if the poly is carrying a legally-registered handgun?
Well, the proportion of hotness is somewhat higher here in the Netherlands, though this depends somewhat on what counts as hot. I am just sort of ordinary but I do clean up all right.
Well my wife and I are kinda hot by American standards, but that might be just ordinary in the Netherlands. 
I’m afraid though that we might seem slovenly and uncouth by the standards of a culture that gets up and cleans the house before they go to work.
I’m also unsure how I could adjust to the early hours that y’all keep.
They’ll realize Diogenes’s holiness and shoot the oppressive man that keeps them under his thumb.
Just as I suspected. You don’t have anything except your bald assertion that we should bow to your “expertise” because, well, you said so.
I note that all you can do is repeat how “It’s only about navy guys who aren’t fucking” and then come up with some sort of bullshit analogy to bugs and nuclear physics, instead of doing any explaining about how group dynamics is totally different when people are fucking.
Oh, and you’ve also thrown in a bunch of ad hominems to make your point even stronger and claiming how you don’t even need to respond with cites, though I would contend that I’ve made enough of a connection that you do.
But whatever – after all the posts on this board about poly relationships where one person gets jealous or feels left out, you can feel free to stay in denial all you want. You’ve demonstrated your inability.
I’ll take “Things I never thought would need an explanation for 1000,” Alex.
What scientific evidence is there that there is a monogamous orientation? Most societies that have existed have had polyamorous relationships. The idea that monogamy is the norm is a relatively recent invention.
I’ll take “Distressing inability to extrapolate for 1$”, dipshit.
What Dio comes down to is: “Nobody should be allowed to judge anyone, except when it comes to people I don’t like.”
Of course this reveals the fundamental idiocy of the “don’t-judge” ethic, since everyone does believe some other group to be immoral and has to go through increasingly elaborate logical contortions to justify their beliefs.
Pot, meet kettle.
From Merriam-Webster Online:
1 : to infer (values of a variable in an unobserved interval) from values within an already observed interval
2 a :** to project, extend, or expand (known data or experience) into an area not known or experienced so as to arrive at a usually conjectural knowledge of the unknown area** <extrapolates present trends to construct an image of the future> b : to predict by projecting past experience or known data <extrapolate public sentiment on one issue from known public reaction on others>
In reference to this specific scenario, you are attempting to hypothesize about the sexual dynamics of a multi-gender romantic relationship from a study of group dynamics of single-gender vocational and physically proximal relationship in which the strong and often irrational emotions and entanglements that come with romantic interaction (i.e. infatuation, jealousy, possessiveness) are extant a negligible degree.
In other words, be honest and admit that your citation has no relevance to the discussion at hand.
Stranger
Add to that the huge amount of hypocrisy involved in many a long-term, supposedly monogamous, relationship. I don’t think it is far-fetched to say all of us have friends/know people that openly cheat on their partners. Meaning that they’ll actually brag about to all and sundry yet we’re supposed to “pretend” that the other partner is innocent to the behavior. Never mind going back a generation or two – The Fab Fifties come to mind – when women were basically kept objects and had almost no choice but tolerate the cheating.
I simply think that if at some point you find a need for more than what your partner provides, the right thing to do is bring it out in the open.
And do you have any evidence for this beyond your own imagination?
I think that was the point of the analogy - to show how irrational your choice of cite was by positing an equally irrelevant application of something else. But hey, that’s only what analogies are all about.
Look, people find love and react to it in many different ways. Some people live polyamorous lives. What are we worried about saving people from? Why do we care if someone in the relationship is feeling left out. Why do they stay? They can go look for monogamy elsewhere if they so choose. Also, it doesn’t recognize the possibility that all three people actually love each other. Maybe ALL THREE people feel left out, you know, like a parent in a marriage, or a middle-child, or whatever, people feel left out even if they aren’t, and sometimes they feel left out because they are. What does it matter if everyone is a consenting adult? If they feel left out it’s their decision to stay. Maybe everyone wonders if the others love each other more than they love you. Whatever, it’s a choice.
Y’all are just being tools. Some poly relationships are good, some are bad.
Point out a non religous poly relationship lasting over 20 years and I’ll give you a point.
Keep in mind that women who have lost their sexual marketability after childbirth are somewhat coerced to accept a third partner in the “marriage” .
Why do you think that longevity of relationship is a necessary criteria?
Right, because old women can’t exercise power over their lives? Would it be better if he divorced her for a young thing? What?
The only poly I’ve ever known really was a woman and she had a man in DC and a man in Scotland. I knew her man in DC kind of, but I talked to her a lot more than him.
People make their choices. A lot of people that flit from relationship to relationship would do well with a polyamorous lifestyle where they know someone might come back to them if they can just let them go when they want. I know lots of party-kids that fit this type. It’s a fairly common orientation for the type of people that are attracted to raves or the goth scene and other such things. The very idea that something is missing from our lives if we are not constantly in a relationship is kind of an implanted idea reinforced by base urges.
I choose a monogamous relationship for myself. It’s simpler that way. But if we find that right girl who wants to stay home and play house, well then…
Nobody said he wasn’t entitled to his own opinion. Of course he is. That doesn’t mean we aren’t entitled to comment on his opinion, or express our opinion that he’s a fuckwad.
(I am so sick of this, “Well, I’m entitled to my opinion!” as if a magic phrase to protect one from criticism)
As long as people aren’t actually cheating – meaning, it’s all open and honest – I really don’t give a shit. Is polygamy natural? Who knows? Who cares? (Snake venom’s natural)
Really, whatever happened to “live and let live?”
I think the key issue is the confusing of approval with tolerance. I can tolerate polyamory. I completely disapprove of it. If my husband came to me and told me he wanted to pursue this course of action, he would find himself divorced very quickly. I don’t care that I haven’t tried it and therefore am somehow unqualified to “judge” it.
I do not ask it to be banned or legislated against. I see no reason for me to express admiration or esteem for the practice. If those who actively participate in this find this position difficult, that is their problem–practicing a “lifestyle” outside societal conventions is fraught with opportunities for hurt feelings, as homosexuals have known for years. IMO, gay couples are more likely to find acceptance (at least in my world) than polyamorous ones. The world is full of other people who routinely offend me in some way or another. Live and let live is a good rule to go by, and I do so. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have my own feelings on the subject.
I am not here to defend Dio. I want to make the point that tolerance is not the same as approval. I tolerate porn–I do not approve of it. I tolerate the likes of Sarah Palin, but do not approve of her choices, her positions or her actions. If you all can’t see the difference, I’m not sure there can be any fruitful discussion here. I do think some valid reservations about this “lifestyle” have been raised: namely, the treatment of women within these relationships. I would like to think that all the people involved are adults and capable of making their own decisions and living with those consequences (whatever they may be–good and bad), but relationships are complex and not always straightforward.
Bottom line? You want to have more than one partner etc? If your spouse/partners agree, who am I to say no? And so I don’t. But don’t expect me to validate your choice.
I don’t think anyone’s asking for his “approval” so much as for him to knock off the snarky comments, eleanorigby. I certainly find the idea of polygamy kind of “icky” – in that it’s so not MY thing. But as for others, I really don’t care one way or another. Literally – I don’t approve or disapprove.
I’m just tired of Dio’s absolute black and white, “women must be abused/oppressed/have been molested as children” etc.
Obviously you have some relationships where women are being suppressed. That’s a given. But his idea that it’s automatically a case of childhood trauma is so blatantly offensive, and the way he expresses those comments is sickening.