I’ve tried not answering these calls, but that doesn’t discourage them. I have noticed a pattern where I get targeted by a particular autodialler, and it will phone me several times a day for weeks until I eventually answer, and then it’ll go relatively quiet for a bit until the next persistent autodialler comes along.
The thing is, I have nothing personal against the sorryarsed bastard whose job it is to speak to me, so I can’t be abusive to them. They’re just ordinary people doing a desperate job. But I reckon their bosses are cnuts all, to the extent that they monitor the phones (and keystrokes, and toilet breaks etc), so maybe I could leave an abusive message just for the boss.
Great suggestions all, BTW. I’m sure I’ll have the opportunity to try each and every one of them. Keep them coming…
There is a legendary Pit rant by Cervaise in response to a poster incoherently praising the joys of telemarketing.
Telemarketing is such a rampant disease here in America at this point that my sympathies have evaporated. These people feel no shame at all in stealing the one thing that can not be returned to me: my time. The fact that they have accepted a job where this theft is a requirement only indicates to me that they are soulless, not pitiable.
Various abuse/revenge fantasies are not effective however, because they require that you spend more time on the phone with them, which is exactly what they want, giving their expertly-written :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: casual sales pitch a chance to go to work on your subconscious.
Strategy 1: Pick up the phone. People who want to talk to you will respond right away. The instant after I say “hello”, the person has exactly 3/4 of a second to respond. Autodiallers have to signal the drone that they must swing into action, so if I hear nothing in that time, click. On the rare occasion where it might actually have been a friend (the difference between an autodial delay and that caused by a friend with a momentary glitch in reception is easy to detect after very little experience), they can call back.
Strategy 2: If a human-sounding organism does respond quickly (they’ve been getting better at this as more people cotton onto Strategy 1; cf. Soulless, above), do not listen to the sales pitch for even a moment. Successful sales by cold calling are what keep the disease alive. Therefore, it does not matter in the least what the product or service is, you are not interested in buying at as the result of a cold call. Interrupt them with the words “Please take me off your call list” and hang up. They have no regard for your time, so you have no regard for their alleged feelings. If they actually managed to squeeze the name of the company or product before you took your time back, and you are in fact interested, you can contact the company through a marketing channel you don’t mind interacting with.
Before we had the do-not-call list, I used a TeleZapper. If any automated call comes in, the gadget somehow “knows,” and sends back a “this line has been disconnected” signal. So you don’t get a repeat call from that company, and they probably won’t sell your number to someone else, either.
Don’t know if it’s universal, but the real tipoff to a sales call, is right after they ask for me by name, and I say, “Speaking,” they respond with “How are 'ya?”
Too time pressed to do it, but my inclination is to start, “Gee, thanks for asking. Not too well. The radiation is not too bad, but the chemo really makes me feel awful. It was bad enough when my wife died and the house burnt down, but now the bankruptcy is really making me feel bad…”
I wonder who long I could continue before they hung up?
To actually answer the question (although the ancedotes are amusing), you need to register with the Telephone Preference Service which is the UK equivalent of the “Do Not Call List”.
