First of all, cats are wonderful creatures, worthy of all our love and respect. And certainly worthy of all the rights we can reasonably give them now.
That having been said, I sometimes wonder. Do they truly like us? Or do they just tolerate us, because they have to rely on us for practical reasons?
Now you have to admit, although dogs surely love us thru and thru, cats are actually more independent than dogs, and really that way more humanlike, let’s face it.
I tell you, I had one cat as a child (she died in 1988, when I was still 19). And all she ever wanted was to have kittens. Isn’t that sad? Although when we got our kitten Misty, the other matronly cat (I’d call her), adopted her. Isn’t that touching? (The cat who wanted kittens, was Buffy BTW [if you’re keeping track]).
Thecats I have now, I don’t know. They’re rescues, who only trust me. But do they truly love me? I’ll always love them, of course. And they’re very sweet. But their feelings? I just don’t know.
Thoughts? Personal experiences?
EDIT: If anyone wants to post the pictures in the links, feel free. I’m not asking you to. But you know, if you wanted to…
Pretty sure my two like me. They’ll follow me to get attention, including into the bathroom, and one is very dedicated to helping me take naps :). Both will ask for attention, including pushing objects like books or the laptop aside and climbing on me. Both are prone to licking hands. Yes, they are both definitely cats, not dogs.
Allie, aka Princess Razorfang Scissorpaws:
And our newer arrival, a community cat who seems to have decided to move in with us. We call him Buddy, another set of humans he’s been known to hang out with call him Red. He probably has at least one more additional set we haven’t identified yet.
Allie definitely likes the humans in the household more than she likes Buddy, who does seem to want to make friends with her, but she seems to have a case of grumpy elder going on (she’s 11, he’s estimated at about 7).
Taz either loves me or loves my body heat. As soon as I sit in my recliner, he claims one or the other side of my lap, lying on my leg and against the arm of the chair. I assume it’s the body heat thing, since he’s an old guy (closing in on 16 we think) and he pretty much sleeps all the time.
I know Ziva likes me more than anyone else - she immediately hides from visitors and barely tolerates my husband - but you’d think a rescue would be more grateful to her rescuer. She’s lived here since early 2009, and she’s still skittish. On very very very rare occasions, she might join me on the couch for skritches, but mostly the best I can expect is that she won’t run when I bend to pet her. She’s got issues…
So in answer to the topic question - who the heck knows??
As a lifelong cat cohabitor (currently cohabiting with 5) I’m quite confident that cats have the catacity capacity to like and even love humans. They are more selective in who they like and love than dogs, but that just makes them more human-like IMO.
Like porn, you know it when you see it. Being liked or loved by a cat is more of a feeling rather than a set of measurable signs, in the same manner that you feel liked or loved by another human, minus verbal communication. And like humans, some cats can fake affection when they simply want something from you. Kinda like feline prostitutes in that respect.
From an evolutionary standpoint, there is no reason an advanced species other than hominids would not evolve the capacity to like or love members of a different species. If what you feel for your dog or cat can accurately be called love, then what you get in return from them can also be accurately called love.
2 of my cats love me, 2 tolerate me and 1 is a prostitute.
I’m sure cats can like and even love us. There are signs that cats feel affection for some other cats, particularly their mothers. The raised tail as greeting. The head-butting. No doubt licking can be one. Our cats do these things with us. They also want to be fed, and follow us around in ways that could simply suggest we’re the most interesting phenomenon within view. But the signs of affection are pretty clear.
We probably can’t assume affection feels and works the same way for them that we experience, at least not entirely. But I have no trouble recognizing similar themes.
I think there’s research showing that the emotional capacity kittens have for loving their mothers, a necessary skill to survive to adulthood, gets transferred to us. That seems consistent with what we observe.
It’s a very strong human attribute to be attached to the humans who brought us up as parents. Comparatively few children, even if they don’t love their parents, lack that pull. So in that respect, dogs are very much like humans, even though they tend to sniff butts in greeting more than we do.
Cats vary hugely in my relatively limited experience. There was a Maine Coon we rescued who was undoubtedly fond of us on a consistent basis.
I think it depends on the cat. My friend got two feral kittens that he couldn’t hold without getting scratched to death. They’re a year old now and still want nothing to do with people. He keeps them inside his house knowing that if they ever got out they would be gone like the wind. They hide and sleep all day and roam the house at night.
Most domesticated cats seem to tolerate people and some even like people, but unlike most dogs, they can be antisocial at times.
I got a rehomed cat who has had a tumultuous life, being passed around from home to home, finally landing here. I am a dedicated experienced cat lady and I can’t figure this creature out, except she is warped by her past. She is almost feral, will not be petted except a light stroking of her back, will not sleep next to me or sit on my lap. She has bad manners and is a very big strong cat (part Maine coon), so I am always a little wary of her. She spends most of the day prowling around and sleeping in odd spots. She seems friendly enough when I talk to her, she rolls around, purring and stretching, exposing her belly. Most of the time she’s in the window looking at birds and bugs outside. I’m planning on moving to an apartment in a few months, I don’t know how that’s going to go! She is extremely beautiful, even for a cat. But otherwise, she’s the cat who lives in the house, somewhere around…
A year now, or more. We lead a quiet life, I try to play with her every day, she has toys, places to explore, all the elements are in place. But seems for naught. I know, nothing can be rushed or changed, it is what it is. But it’s heartbreaking after my two previous kitty lovebugs. She has a cushion, and a cat bed, and an open window to sit in, and at night, nowhere to be found - on a scrap of filthy old rug in the basement…as i said, seem happy to see me, but is no lap cat. Just a cat who lives in the house, somewhere.
Several years ago I brought in a rescue who had lived in my neighborhood for a few years. She liked me and the other cats well enough but kept to herself mostly. After about two years, I was sitting on the couch talking on the phone and she climbed into my lap. Surprised the hell out of me. Now she loves being in my lap, especially when I’m at my desk on the computer. I hope your kitty will surprise you one day.
She likely finds that reassuring but being happy to see you says a great deal.
Given what you said of her past, she likely has trust issues but sees you as safe as far as she can do that.
Maybe for the move, talk to your vet about some mild medication to make it easier. She’ll likely think she’s being abandoned again.
Cats have empathy. I just recently watched a video on tik tok. A dog and kitty were playing. As they were playing, Kitty lets out a little yelp. This triggers the mama cat. She then proceeds to claw dog in the face.
Almost immediately after clawing the dog in the face mama cat realizes kitty wasn’t hurt.
Mama cat then walks back over towards the dog and starts being really affectionate and giving him head bumps and will like. As if to say: “Sorry”.
Cats, like dogs and humans, can form bonds with other individuals just fine. What cats don’t do, unlike dogs and humans, is form bond with groups.
Of course, just because cats can form bonds with others, doesn’t mean that they necessarily will, in any given case. I’ve certainly known some cats who appreciated the free room and board deal, but saw no need to associate with anyone else living in the house.
Domestic cats are solitary hunters, but stray and feral cats can and do bond in groups (clowders) when it suits them. They are not as social as dogs, but certainly not asocial. Lions form social prides and hunt in groups, so social behavior is in the Felidae family genetic makeup.
Cats are kind of like introverted humans. They generally like to be alone, but often like the company of others and sometimes let loose and party.
