A letter to the local paper yesterday echoed the sentiments of some posters here, calling into question the efficacy of employing a helper, especially in terms of the child’s greater good:
“[Being dumped with a helper] has a terrbile effect on the child, who, after being passed from helper to helper and seldom spending time with his mother or father, grows up with no concept of what a parent is”.
The writer also criticises those who employ helpers for not doing household chores, such as cooking, washing and shopping.
I wonder if he’s read Alice Miller’s The Drama of the Gifted Child: the Search for the True Self. One of the Polish/Swiss psychologists’s beliefs is that for many children it is actually better that they be brought up by a nanny/maid, or indeed grandparents, than by “abusive” parents, meaning for example those who wish to realise their own dreams through their children.
Are all the maids employed by American families nationals (presumably Hispanics), or does an illegal trade exist as well?
We had a “nanny” when we lived in Thailand, a young girl of about 18-19 who was essentially a live in babysitter. She was paid BHT 4000/month, which was, at the time, roughly equal to $100. This was also more or less the average monthly Thai salary. Since she also received room and board, this was not at all bad. I once bought her a relatively inexpensive television just so she’d have her own TV to watch in her room. It cost about BHT 4000 and I caught some flak from my missus, who is Thai, for doing this. Nong also did some light housekeeping but was not really great at that.
We also had another woman who came in thrice a week to help with cleaning and cook meals. She was paid about 75% of our nanny, and would do our grocery shopping and cook and do cleaning.
Some of our neighbors, usually the Chinese/Thai, would hire undocumented Burmese for similar tasks and pay them about 50% or less of what we paid. These women (it’s always women) would allegedly be worked much harder than what we expected and be threatened with being turned over to immigration if they ever said anything. They were also supposedly not allowed to leave the house and either told they would be caught by immigration (not likely) or called out if they strayed from the house.
The domestics who worked for farang families (and typically spoke decent English) could command a 50% or more premium. Our nanny and cook/cleaner/helper spoke no English at all.
FWIW, I’ve also heard of some very horrible living conditions for Filipina maids/nannies of Saudi families, including rape/sexual abuse, but of course have no personal experience with this.
My wife’s cousin recently rented out the ground floor of their 3-storey house to a family of four. They employ an Indonesian helper, who has told the cousin’s Filipina helper (with the family for 13 years now) that she gets paid less than 60% of the legal rate. She also gets only fruit and bread to eat, and no day off (by law should be one day per week). The family upstairs are taking her food during the day, when the family are out, and trying to find a way to resolve the situation together with the Indonesian and with her approval. As already noted, such a situation is far from uncommon, as more and more employers turn to women from Indonesia, Sri Lanka and Nepal, who are poorer than their Filipina counterparts, speak worse English, and are less well organised in terms of suport groups and unions. Moreover, the Indonesian Consulate tends not to be supportive.