Do Girls Mature Faster Than Boys?

Great Debates
1

I don’t think so. I’ve heard this applied so many times by countless (i.e. I haven’t counted them yet) people and movies as to why teenage girls are more attracted to the older guys. Speaking from an emotional point of view (not physical), my reasoning is this:

  1. N’Sync, Backstreet Boys, 98 Degrees… even the Beatles. Where ever there’s a screaming girl in the crowd that that totally cute guy might have glanced her way, there does not exist maturity. Note that this is not a statement about the musical quality, just a commentary on the reaction to it.

  2. Self-destructive relationships (otherwise known as the Nice Guys Don’t Get Laid syndrome/Everything You Want phenomenon). There’s a lot more detail one could go into here, but I think you know what I’m talking about.

  3. The continual use of the word “cute” for just about everything.

  4. The existance and popularity of “Seventeen”, “Cosmopolotain”, or any other magazine that features the “20 Ways to Turn Him On” and “Is He A Looser? Take Our Quiz!” articles written by people with no talent five minutes before the deadline.

This is not to say that boys/men are any more mature than girls/women. I’m just arguing that girls/women aren’t as mature as conventional wisdom would make them out to be. And frankly, I’m tired of hearing two women using the phrase, “Well, of course you know that girls mature faster than boys.”

As referential material, I offer you this. Even if you’ve read it before, this one has illustrations.

2

**

I agree. Boys and girls may behave in different ways but in my experience girls don’t mature faster then boys.

Marc

3

You seem to be grouping all women/girls and saying that all of us act this way. I’m 17 and I don’t scream if I’m at a concert, I don’t say “cute”, I don’t read those girly-girly magazines and I don’t ever get into destructive relationships. This, according to your reasoning, would make me mature, no? That should prove to you that not ALL women are like you said, and that some of us are more mature than men.

I have spoken.

4

Not to mention the fact that there are QUITE a lot of men out there who go out drinkin’ with the boys all the time, gather together during football season and try to keep a hold of their frat days…

60 year old men chasing 20 year old tail…

An argument can be made either way.

5

Broken Doll wrote:

Aren’t you supposed to say “nyah nyah!” after that? :slight_smile:

6

Merely applying a generalization to yourself with that conculsuion is immature:)

7

I’m *sure * you must have meant “some of us are more mature than some men.” Otherwise you have made quite a ridiculous assertion.

8

Granted, I don’t follow what’s going on too closely, but aren’t these mostly pre-teen/early teen girls? As in 10-14? I certainly never experienced any hysterics when listening to any of these bands, unless yelling “PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAKE IT STOP” counts as hysterics.
But I will give you The Beatles. I do, or I did, scream over them when I was 15. Yes, I screamed over footage of the concerts. There, now you have my deepest, darkest secret.

“Nice Guys” don’t get laid because they are usually nice to only the “good looking” or “beautiful” girls. You have to be nice to everybody in order to qualify as a “nice guy” Secondly, I’m 17 and I have yet to be in an abusive relationship. Hell, I probably have one of the healthiest relationships out of everyone, including adults, that I know IRL. FTR, he is almost 3 years older than me. I was more mature at 15 than he was at 18.

I have only used the word “Cute” twice, once for Paul McCartney, once for Sting. But, believe it or not, even as a product of a public schools, I have a better vocabulary than that.

Well, I don’t know what to tell you about this. I personally read Seventeen when I was 12, but stopped after I turned 13. I think that is the age group for the majority of the girls who do read that magazine. I may be wrong, but isn’t “Cosmopolotain” geared towards 20 somethings?

Now, I offer a point by point explanation, because I know a lot of teenage girls. Hell, I go to school with them everyday. And the vast majority are pretty much the same way I am. But then again, the smartest girl in our class loves Pokemon. shrugs My point is, blanket statements are not going to cut it. I can’t say girls mature faster, although, from my personal experience, the girls I know ARE more mature than the boys I know. But I also can’t agree with your “points” on any level, because I do not think they are valid.

9

As noted elsewhere, most of these fans are preteen - hopefully you aren’t talking about them in the getting laid part? Also, obviously only the fans of those groups are at the shows, which are designed to appeal to preteens. In other words it’s preselected for immaturity. The mature ones aren’t at the concert.

You might want to compare the behavior of these preteens to a stereotypical frat party - not exactly a bastion of maturity, and they’re at least 5 years older. (Note: I have friends who were at frats nothing like this, just a convenient descriptor.)

There’s some immaturity associated with self destructive relationships, but you can be 50 and in a bad relationship. As a single woman, I can tell you a guy whining about how he deserves to get laid is neither nice nor attractive. Try losing the whining and entitlement, it might help. (That’s a general statement, not personal.)

Gee, convinced me.

Personally, I always thought my sister’s Seventeen’s were hysterical. And have you seen a men’s health magazine lately?

As someone who lived in a co-ed dorm for four years, I feel I have a special perspective. The men were, in general, more likely to have to prove things like maturity and manliness by doing stupid things. IMHO, if ya gotta prove it, ya ain’t got it. The women, in general, had a better sense of themselves. There were certainly exceptions (sometimes big ones) but, I think, there was a small difference.

But these are only generalities, and it’s the individuals that really count, so it’s only important if you let it be. Hint: By caring so much about what’s said by people in movies or on the street, you don’t help your argument.

10

Skott wrote:

What is the “Everything You Want” phenomenon?
Beyond being a boy band, I mean?

11

But of course Tzel, excuse moi for the tiny mistake. :rolleyes:

12

Do girls mature faster then boys, yes or no? Most people would say yes but I’ve never actually heard anyone justify that answer. In my personal experience girls of the same age make just as many stupid decisions as boys. So by what criteria would someone say girls are more mature?

Marc

13

behavior aside, how about physiology?

14

Perhaps it is that girls appear more mature. Girls get their physical growth earlier than boys. Remember in middle school when for a year or two the girls were suddenly taller than the boys? Most girls have all of their height by 15 or 16. They may continue to “fill out”, and of course there is still bone formation going on, but as far as their basic outward appearance goes, they are pretty much done growing. Boys have, generally, a later growth spurt, and don’t get their full height until a year or two later. It seems superficial, but I think that simply looking older tends to make people assume you are older.

Also, girls tend to acquire verbal and social skills earlier. Of course, there is still great debate over whether those differences are truly biological in nature or simply a product of early social conditioning. But still, girls are generally more aware of social cues and better at using language in social situations. So they may appear to be more mature, even though the actual differences may not be as great.

15

Perhaps my point has been misunderstood. For one, in generalizations such as this, not everybody is going to fit. For those that fall outside of the generalization, I’m very glad to hear it. I doubt may people on this board are going to fall into the immature category via the methods I’ve described.

Secondly, I’m not trying to say that men are more mature. To me, it’s apparent that there are plenty of immature men; however, they are usually being immature in more visible ways.

Thirdly, I’m speaking across the age spectrum. Yes, the boy band-screaming girl thing usually stops around 14 or 15 (which does not, IMO, make them a preteen phenomenon). But even girls up to that age have been heard to claim that they’re more mature than boys… and then turn around and go googly-eyed when 98 degrees comes on television.

After the 14-15 year old range, you can find that girls start falling into the destructive relationship category of immaturity, while still claiming to be more mature than men (usually because of the man they’re involved with :wink: ). This can last throughout a lifetime, as can other causes/symptoms.

Hopefully, as life goes on, we all begin to become more mature as we take on more and more responsibility. I just have a hard time believing, in general, that girls/women are more mature than boys/men on an emotional level. I believe that they are more or less equal at any given point in their age.

But since I live in California, it may be that my sample base used to determine the femine maturity level (or lack thereof) is skewed. :slight_smile:

16

perhaps it’s a chicken-and-the-egg situation. [generalization] Girls are attracted to older boys…is this because they are more mature than boys their age, or are they more mature than boys their age because they spend more time with older people?[/generalization]

17

Third possibility: Men/boys are frequently expected to take more of a leadership role in relationships. This leads to girls (and women) looking to older boys/men then themselves, and to guys looking for younger girls.

Having said that, I do believe that girls mature somewhat faster than boys, on average.

18

There’s a song by the band Vertical Horizon called “Everything You Want”. It’s basically about a guy who’s perfect for a girl, but the girl doesn’t want him and she doesn’t know why.

Looking at the lyrics, (like “You’re waiting for someone to push you away”, for instance), it can be inferred that the reason is that the relationship is not self-destructive enough.

(If the above link doesn’t work, try this and click on the song “Everything You Want”.)

19

Why don’t we try and look this one up? Because I have always thought that in general, not always, girls mature emotionally and physically just a little earlier than boys. I’m suspecting that for many years the appearance of emotional maturity may have come from our tendency as a society to “shelter” our girls. In my mother’s day girls were simply not given the freedom to explore their world or “sow wild oats” like the boys. It was often expected of boys to engage in this kind of behavior. Women were groomed from a young age to be lady-like and prepare themselves for motherhood. They were often given more responsibilty around the home while boys were free to pursue manly activities like sports. None of this may apply now. Society has changed. This is why we see more girls “acting out” and getting into trouble. Even back in the 70’s when I was a teen boys often did things that ran afoul of the law but rarely girls.

I would also imagine that girls to some extent do mature physically a little earlier than boys. This may be some measure that nature has built in, so that the species will survive. The earlier a species is able to reproduce the greater chance of more offspring, or something like that. And most fail safe measures are built into the female of the species. Nature “plays around with” it’s females less than it’s males. But I’m no biologist and cannot say where I got this idea. It just seems logical to me.

I also think that girls by “nature” may often appear to be more mature. They are generally not as daring as boys. They are usually less aggressive. I’ve raised a boy and a girl. (If you could call my girl a girl. Big tomboy.) My girl was always daring, aggressive, and independent, but she was rarely violent. While she didn’t care much for dolls, she was not terribly interested in guns or weapons either. Not so my son, even though I didn’t promote him playing with guns, he’s always loved to play army and gunslinger. I wouldn’t buy him a sword, so he would improvise with a stick. He also loves to wrestle and fight. My daughter might like a good argument now and then but she would rather not get physical. The boy loves to pick and play and wrestle until someone gets hurt. Anyway, the point I’m making is that all this full tilt aggressive behavior that often continues on into adulthood (read: Monday Night Football) might also be taken as immaturity. Because it’s so loud, frenzied and out there. Often to women it seems unnecessary and childish.

In general girls are quieter and gentler by nature and this might be interpreted as maturity. I’m just speculating here so don’t go off the deep end on me. While my daughter was not necessarily physically aggressive the child could “warp an anvil” or “break a ball bearing”, as my brother-in-law used to say. She was destructive as hell. She could glance at something and it would break. She used to drive me crazy. My 9 year old niece is messy as hell. We call her “the Spill Queen”. My 9 year old son isn’t as big a mess. I fed her spagetti a couple of weeks ago for dinner and found it on the wall! How’d she do that anyway? Yet she is the model little “miss priss”. LOL

Oh yeah and why do girls like older boys? Come on now give me a break! When I was 14 I looked 16 why would I want a boy that looks 14? Not to mention older boys are smoother socially.

Needs2know

20

Am I responding too much? I never know :wink:

I think that the reason girls are attracted to older boys is two-fold: 1) Girls tend to look for someone who can protect them and older boys are seen as someone who can do that; 2) Girls look for someone they can nurture.

So an immature, older guy would be the perfect fit. Of course, this is, again, a generalization… and it would open a whole other can of worms to say that these desires might come from the hunt/gather formation of our primitive society.