Do guys get upset when a woman claims she went somewhere, did something with you, but it wasn't you?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Okay, putting on my fire-retardant suit because I’m sure to get flamed to death, but watching *King of Queens * and Doug took Carrie to a cabin that he thought he took her to before, but it wasn’t her.

Guys and gals (am I allowed to say that?), you’ve had it happen to you. How do you react? I’ve done with my ex and she got upset. Understandable. But I’ve also done it with female friends whom I have absolutely no chance of getting together with and they’ve gotten really upset. Why?

I’ve had female and male friends do it to me and I just put it off as, “Nope, wasn’t me.” or “If it was me, I don’t remember, sorry.”. Is it just me that doesn’t care?

2

Confusing me with some distant BF from the past would be funny.

Confusing me with your side piece, not so much.

3

On a somewhat related note. A female friend to whom I was nowhere near her type, but we hung out together a lot. We were hanging out all day and stopped by a kiosk for ice cream after lunch. I commented that the girl who served us (we’d see her before) was cute. No harm, no foul, nothing said. Went to the movies, had dinner and on the way to take my friend home, she said she wanted ice cream again. I said: “I hope the same girl isn’t there because she saw us earlier”. My friend blew up! “WHY! YOU LIKE HER?! YOU LIKE HER HUH?!” My outside voice: “Ummm…no, I just thought it would be funny because we already saw her once.” My inside voice: “WTF! We’re not together and you comment about guys?!”.

Thankfully, the girl wasn’t there and a guy served us. It was a while before we went back to get ice cream from there again. Never saw the girl again.

4

At my age I’m lucky I can remember where I left my car–lapses of this nature are pretty normal. And if some guy I was out with confused things like that I’d just look at it that he’s invested in me so much that he’s projecting me backward into happy moments before we met and I’d kinda go “aww!” Unless he’s confusing me with a side piece, in which case I might kick his ass. :wink:

5

I can see my ex getting mad. But I honestly viewed them just a friends, no thoughts of ever getting together with them at any level. No side piece either. I always hang out with just one person at time, male or female. Just the way I am. Three’s a crowd. No matter the gender, if my friend wants to bring along his/her partner, I’d rather bow out and let them have their time together rather than be a threesome. Especially since I’m brutally honest and may let something my friend told me in private, slip. I told my ex everything, even commenting if someone was cute or pretty as I’ve posted before and got major butt bruises for admitting I did that.

6

To be clear. It’s always some funny memory for me. “Hey, remember when we had ice cream here and I dropped my cone?”.

“It wasn’t me.”

“Yes, it was, you were wearing those same shorts!”

“It wasn’t me! You must be thinking of someone else!”

“Who else could it have been? I’ve only come here with you?”

Silence

7

Maybe they’re not upset because they think you mixed them up with someone else. Maybe it’s because you end up changing the conversation from whatever it was about to trying to convince them that they were with you when you dropped your ice cream cone. That’s what happens to me- the people who do this to me most often don’t accept " Sorry, I don’t remember" when I don’t remember doing something or meeting someone.

8

Moderator Action

This is more personal experience and opinion than factual, so let’s move it to IMHO (from GQ).

9

Upset? It depends on what they did and how long ago.

10

…why would you not be allowed to say ‘gals’?..

I might be minorly irritated if it was obvious he’d never taken me someplace before. Like, really obvious. If we have legit been friends for awhile and hung out before, I could understand the mistake, and wouldn’t be miffed. Hell, my dad makes this mistake between my brother and I all the time, although he listens to me if I persist it wasn’t me.

If it was an SO, eh…it still depends on the context. If he got embarrassed about it, I’d forget about it. Not everyone has the best memory. If it happened consistently and he seemed non-plussed, I’d be a little more concerned.

11

So was he cute?

12

My current girlfriend and my last serious girlfriend are blonde with blue eyes and have the same first name. Mistakes have been made.

13

I often can’t remember if I went somewhere or watched something with a friend, romantic partner (past or present), or sibling. I usually just ask.

14

I’m poly and have a bad memory, so I get ‘who I did what with’ mixed up all the time. If someone is going to get upset by me thinking I went on a trip with them instead of someone else, we’re not going to last long while dating. It’s also funny when you start telling someone a story, then realize halfway through that they were actually involved in it, or worse were the main person in the story and you didn’t remember at first.

15

Hey lingyi, remember that time we had poi and poke at night on, let’s see, was it Kuhio Ave or Maunakea St.? :smiley:

16

I have read that about six times and I still don’t have the faintest idea why you wouldn’t want the same person to see you twice.

If your friend also couldn’t figure that out, maybe that’s what the problem was.

17

Gay male here and it most likely wouldn’t bother me if it’s something minor. Misremembering that we watched a movie together a year or two ago is no big deal. Same thing would apply to some casual café for a lunch.

But, a romantic getaway or a very special dinner? I’d be upset.

18

She probably interpreted your statement as, “I don’t want her to see me again WITH YOU.”

19

It would depend on a lot of variables but 90% of the time it probably wouldn’t bother me at all.

20

I made a mistake when my now wife and I had been going out for a while and she just laughed and said it wasn’t her.

#notallwomen