Do I have a serious memory problem?

In My Humble Opinion
1

I hope I can describe this in a accurate manner, but please bear with me if I can’t.

I noticed about four years ago that I seemed to be having a much harder time keeping track of things that people told me, things I had said, and especially things I had seen.

I was 25 years old at the time, so I didn’t give it too much thought, just figured I was being my normal paranoid self. Also, I have always had an incredible memory–especially visually. If I saw something in a book, I could memorize it with ease, and even recall what it looked like on the page and in what position and so on. Many of the things that I memorized long ago, I still remember–so that is not the problem at all.

The thing that I noticed the most was in relation to movie watching. I would watch a great movie, one that I was totally into–and the next day I wouldn’t remember any of the characters names, I couldn’t recall any of the dialogue, I would say I had forgotten 90% or more of the film. This started to worry me.

Also, I find that I have a very hard time keeping track of appointments. I was late to several meetings last year at work because I had completely forgotten about them. I had heard them announced, and even seen them on paper–but nonetheless, I had no idea that I had missed the start of these meetings.

My wife says it is a failure of mine to fully concentrate on what people are saying to me–and I have to admit that I do wander off occasionally. However, this would not explain the fact that I forget so much of a movie or book that I really enjoy–even love.

The last thing I think I should add is that sometimes if someone prompts me, I will start to remember more. For instance, if you asked me my favorite part of the movie Adaptation (which I have seen three times), I couldn’t really tell you. But if you started discussing the film–the memories would probably start to flood in and I might recall my favorite scene.

So, any amateur (or pro) Doper Psych’s want to take a stab at me?

2

You can take a look at this memory clinic site for information and to find one near you in case you want to get tested.

I do most of the things that you talk about and I don’t think I have a memory problem. My problem is just focusing on one thing enough to retain it well. I don’t think I had to do that as much when I was younger (I am 32). Are you a lot busier than you used to be (meaning a hectic, work/family/play life)?

3

The fact that cuing helps you remember is a good sign. Your memory doesn’t sound much worse than mine, but if you are worried and want to be tested, the professional you should see is a neuropsychologist.

4

Rancid, I developed similar problems about fifteen years ago, but just assumed that it was related to ECT that I had 45 years ago, low grade, long term depression, and the medication that I take for it.

It’s interesting that you mentioned movies. That was the first thing that I noticed. My husband and I would go to the video store and I would pick out movies that we had already seen. Or I would watch a movie that seemed vaguely familiar all the way through and yet I never knew what was going to happen next. I would forget a movie – even one I liked very much – within a very short time.

I will order something out of a catalog and often by the time it gets here (7 to 10 business days), I will forget what I have ordered. That’s kind of neat! It’s like getting a surprise package in the mail and it’s always something you really, really like!

I had to start carrying a small appointments book with me with reminders about meetings and birthdays. I would be lost without it.

If it makes you feel any better, the problem doesn’t seem to have worsened in the last five years or so. I just admit to my friends that I have become very absentminded and that I’m trying to cope with it as best I can. And I apologize for any inconvenience I cause others. (I try really hard not to.)

5

I used to have a fantastic memory myself. It started fading a few years ago. I’m 25 now.

It seems I forget everything. People’s names, streets, directions, appointments. For a while, it was kind of funny to be the guy that never remembered anything, and my friends adapted well. They’d start conversations with “remember how I told you before about so and so”, to give me a brief intro into what we were about to discuss. Now its gotten annoying.

I find that I really have to focus now and pay attention to things I need to remember. It helps me a lot. I’ve recently started dating one of my friends, so when she tells me something I feel I need to remember, I pause the conversation for a second or 2 and repeat it back in my head like “okay, this is important and I need to remember this”. Its helped an amazing amount for me. She seems shocked every time she doesn’t have to remind me about something.

I wouldn’t worry about it TOO much, although I wouldn’t be too comfortable in it if I were you either. With my memory, I realize I can’t clutter it up with insignificant stuff like movies, so I don’t even try to remember those. Names are still my biggest weakness, but I’m getting better. It just takes a little discipline.

6

Always had an excellent memory myself. I sometimes call it near-eidetic, because it’s not a true photographic. For instance, I could read a book and almost exactly remember certain dialogues… could even see the page and where it was on the page, but not the words themselves.

Anyway, I took great pride in it, but in my mid-20’s I seemed less able to recall the minutiae I never used to have a problem with. Could watch a movie and remember most of it, but I’d always forget the ending. Even rewatching it would not trigger the memory until I actually saw the ending again.

I’d do things I’d never done before like lock my keys in the car, or misplace something important, or forget my lunch for the day, etc.

Now, I’m no expert, so your mileage may vary here, but I chalked it up to the fact that as my memory seemed to be fading, I was accepting greater responsibilities in life. Car payments, electric bills, advancement at work that required more effort and concentration, relationships with friends and relatives reaching new plateaus, and so on.

And while my memory still isn’t what it was 10 years ago, in the past few years I’ve trained myself to remember the things I feel I should. I don’t know that I can properly or completely describe the practices I’ve adopted and that seem to work for me, but I’ll try.

Repetition is the big one. I have a continuous inner dialogue running when my mind isn’t preoccupied with something that requires my undivided attention. If I’m just walking down the street I’ll replay events or conversations in my mind. For conversations, maybe pretend I’m in a debate and take a contradictory position and try to counter every thing the other person said (also seems to help keep the wit nice and sharp). Or make a little diddy out of it and use my footfalls as a beat keeper and sing it to myself.

Association is the next in line. I read somewhere once that repetition and association are the best methods by which humans learn. I also recall reading somewhere that we remember things best in chunks of information, i.e. it’s easier to remember 1492 than the numbers 1 and 4 and 9 and 2 separately. So it stands to reason that pairing memories with other memories should make them easier to remember. I often find that a smell or a sound will trigger memories, so that thinking led me to try and associate new memories with older ones.

Here’s where it gets tricky though. My personal associations probably only make sense to me, as someone elses, if laid out linearly, probably would seem silly to me. The trick is to just use what comes to mind. For instance (and it’s a weak example, but the only one that comes to mind at this hour), I can remember that Angelina Jolie was the actress who portrayed Lara Croft in the two movies because of an association with cherry flavored Chapstick, which an ex-girlfriend that confessed a sexual attraction to Ms. Jolie, used to use religiously. That and every time I see Ms. Jolie, I wish she’d use some.

I think what it comes down to is a continual effort. To me, losing my memory is one of the scariest things in life. The concept of losing everything I’ve spent all my life learning and figuring out just seems like a fate worse than death. Perhaps most people don’t feel that strongly about it and so would not find themselves so easily motivated to try and counter it, but it’s worked very well for me thus far.

Hope that helps more than confuses.

7

Just noticed that three of us have mentioned that it started happening in our mid-20’s. Perhaps it is just a natural occurance…

But still one worth fighting.

I also forgot, in my haste to just post and stop editing, to mention that everyone is different and so it very well may be something medical that a colorful little pill could help with. Or that a change in diet could counteract. Or that something as simple as more exercise could alter.

Good luck.

8

That’s strange. I don’t remember what I was going to say.

9

I’ve got a terrible memory. Always have. Sometimes it bothers me, but usually I chalk it up to getting older. My father’s memory is TERRIBLE. I personally think he should get it looked at, but I think he keeps forgetting to make the appointment. :slight_smile:

The upside is that you can watch movies over and over, like it was the first time!

10

Oh. I forgot to add this: I have a theory on why memory problems seem to be more prevalent today than they used to be. I think our brains are suffering from information overload. The world is much different today than it was years ago. You’re being bombarded with information at a startling rate these days. The computer, 24 hour news, a million cable stations, radio, and much more complex communications on the job. There’s only so much a brain can hold before stuff starts leaking out.

11

Thanks everyone for the replies, I am suprised at how common this seems to be (maybe brilliant minds only?).

So now I feel slightly encouraged, but still confused. I have taken on a lot of responsibility for someone my age. I have three kids all six and under–so that is enough right there. Maybe life is cutting into my ability to keep up with what really amounts to mundane details when compared to the truly important stuff.

This doesn’t make me any more comfortable with the problem, however. I am going to take some of the suggestions in this thread and attempt to apply them. Maybe I will report back with the results in a couple of weeks.

Lastly, I have to say that I really appreciate the support that Dopers always seem to give when it comes to stuff like this. Most people, even good friends, that I have mentioned this to just brush it off like it doesn’t matter at all. Having another group of people to whine to is always a plus!

12

I know exactly what you mean about the memory lapses. I still have an amazing memory for details, for facts that are especially trivial.

But I don’t remember things that happen to me. I don’t remember trips, or events. It’s like I was there. I’ll say, “I’ve never been to X” and my husband will reply, “We went there in 1999. Don’t you remember?” And I don’t, mostly.

If someone tells me a story very vividly, I’ll get confused and think it happened to me. I write poems and six months later can’t pick mine out of a group of poems, but I can remember batting statistics and am excellent at trivia games.

It’s depressing.

13

Heh, you think that’s bad, I have a problem with “Short term memory” but my “Long term memory” works like a charm.

It’s very bizzare having to deal with things like: “What was that guys name? He just told me yesterday” then two weeks later be like “OH! that’s right, it’s JOHN!” (duh)

That being said, I think what most of you are discribing just comes along with old age. However mid twenties does seem a little young. IANAD though.

14

Your comment about having children reminded me, though I gather (hopefully correctly) that you are male and so this won’t apply to you directly: many women seem to suffer short term memory loss after having children.

15

I am the same way. I have good factual memory (trivia, etc), but lousy episodic memory (memory for events). Therefore I know things, but I can’t tell you how or when I learned them. I frequently forget events from my life, while others remember the stories I told about those events.

16

I’m not alone? It’s weird how happy that makes me.

17

Having recently lost my short-term memory entirely for a span of 4 days - the result of a virus that worked into my brain - I’m inclined to think that if you had a real problem with your memory you’d know it. Trust me, forgetfulness is one thing. A real problem with your memory is something unmistakable.

I experience a lot of things you described in your OP myself, and I am also in that early-30s age group where life has expanded to be exponentially more stressful and busy than it used to be. I am also a naturally preoccupied person who tends to tune out things that I’m not intensely interested in.

And, if it makes you feel any better, I have always worried about my memory because of those things. But I don’t think there’s actually anything wrong with me.

18

I’m 30, similar experiences to most people here. Anything I don’t need to remember, my brain doesn’t bother storing. Most movies I’ve absolutely forgotten. I’m awful at phone numbers now (which I blame on my cell phone more than anything. Once again, information I don’t need to remember, so my brain just doesn’t bother devoting the time to learning it.) Random trivia doesn’t stick as well as it used to. I often forget the names of singers, bands, and albums that I would have been able to name at a drop of a hat a year ago.

Seems perfectly normal to me.

19

Word.

If you think you have a memory problem, you probably don’t.

If you start getting coworkers, family and friends calling you because you missed the date/work/play or are constantly late for something. Yeah, there is a problem.

And if you end up attending a friends wedding while in your pajamas and see nothing wrong with the picture, yeah, you need help.

My philosophy is that if I learn something new, then something else that I already learned has to be chucked out of my 1 bit memory drive for space purposes. The info that is usually jettisoned first are names and Proper Nouns. The stuff that I have learned that has taken their place are the names of Pokemon Characters and Spongebob plotlines.

Patrick: Maybe we should get naked.
Spongebob;" Naw that’s save that for when we sell real estate.

20

Hi everyone, I’m a newby here - I’ve literally just signed up to write this.

I was looking around for some answers to very much exactly the same symptoms that I see I share with many. That’s relieving. One I didn’t notice in anyone’s explanations however was how frustrating it is to be having conversations with friends about films or program’s you’ve watched and loved on TV but hae absolutely no idea who the actors/actresses are or even much of the plot.

I survive at work by Microsoft Outlook. Seriously, without it I would not have a job. In my personal life I depend very much on my fiancé, bless her. It must be so frustrating for her to have to keep a calendar for two, especially when I organise things with friends and forget to tell her until I’m reminded by those friends on the day and we’d now made plans todo something else. Life is a constant hazy trouble.

I just came across this. And by “just” I mean 5 mins ago so I haven’t seen anyone or done anymore research yet but I will…

If anyone has please share with us all what you found and if there’s any hope in it??