Do pedophiles ever say that they are in love with their victims, as a normal adult might romantically be in love with another adult? Or do they pretty much just see the victim as an outlet for sexual urges?
Often they will say they love the child.
The often claim the former (or at least those freaks over at NAMBLA do) but… it’s pretty much the latter. Which is pretty much required for real romantic love. And while some pedophiles do “take care of their children” there’s always a control/power element to the relationship. Their justifications for this are legion, but largely irrelevant.
In my psychology studies, I was taught that there are at least three kinds of pedophiles:
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Adults who are basically still children at heart themselves, and basically seek a partner of their own mental age. These will feel they genuinely love the child, and they will not admit the harm they can do. These people will mostly claim that “children have sexual feelings too” and will say that the child was a willing partner. They will also say that sex is not the main reason for their preference for chidren, and that their relationship " wasn’t about the sex" .
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Adults who might prefer sexual partners their own age, but are too shy, ugly, insecure or whatever, to pursue a “real” partner. But with kids, such men feel safe, less threatened and more confident. In this group, the same spectrum of feelings from the perp for his young victim exists as would in adult relations ships; ranging from love, to friendship with-or without “benefits”, to the casual consumeristic “grab em’, do em and leave em”-attitude. However, in the latter case harming the child is, from the eye of the perp, a side effect, and not the purpose of the sexual act.
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Sadistic adults who like molesting kids because of the absolute power they can have over a child, and of the depravity of it all. These are the sadistic monsters from parent’s nightmares. Fortunately, they are a small minority.
<anecdote>A friend of mine who used to work for child protective services similarly distinguished between a “true” pedophile and an opportunistic one. One characteristic that he said marked the true pedophile was that they had extremely specific tastes, such as liking only 11 y.o. Hispanic boys. True pedophiles also were not attracted to adults in the same way that, say, heterosexuals are not attracted to members of the same sex.</anecdote>
FWIW,
Rob
Aren’t they all monsters from parent’s nightmares though? It is not like the other kinds of pedophiles will do any less damage to a child they rape. The sadism of the rapist does not seem that relevant.
Since this is Straight Dope and we strive for precision, I will point out that pedophilia is simply the sexual attraction to children whether or not any sexual activity occurs. Strictly speaking this is just prepubescent children and not young teens. Sexual activity with children is pederasty.
Not quite. The reason I know is that I recall Hugh Hefner commenting once on rumors that he had once engaged in homosexual sexual activity. He smiled and said that he did as part of the sexual experimentation process, but that he didn’t make a habit of it. He then quoted the following axiom, “Once, a philosopher; twice, a pederast.” 
According to Merriam-Webster, pederasty is defined thusly:
Main Entry: ped·er·ast
Pronunciation: \ˈpe-də-ˌrast\
Function: noun
Etymology: Greek paiderastēs, literally, lover of boys, from paid- ped- + erastēs lover, from erasthai to love — more at eros
Date: circa 1736
: one who practices anal intercourse especially with a boy
— ped·er·as·tic \ˌpe-də-ˈras-tik\ adjective
— ped·er·as·ty \ˈpe-də-ˌras-tē\ noun
They’re all monsters, but I think the level of sadism is very relevant. Plain old rape is bad. Rape with a side order of beatings and cigarette burns to the genitals is worse.
Sexual activity with teens past puberty (but before the age of consent and by full adults) is done by ephebophiles, if I have the spelling right.
Thank you. I was about to make that distinction myself. I would also like to point out that pedophile is, and has been, misused. The origin of the word comes from the Latin pedo meaning “child, or children”, and phile meaning “to like”. So a pedophile is someone who likes kids. Not in a sexual way. Such as a bibliophile likes books. Pedophilia is correctly used. Philia meaning “sexually attracted”.
Not all people who are attracted to minors act on their desires. And the majority of child molesters do not suffer from pedophilia. The scientific community is slowly beginning to show this. But progress is slow. There is very little funding for these studies due to the fact that most of the time people say the only good pedophiliac is a dead pedophiliac.
To answer your question, yes some pedophiliacs do feel romantic towards minors.
If you are interested in the truth about pedophilia read this article.
http://www.williamapercy.com/wiki/images/Pedophilia.pdf
or visit this site. Virtuous Pedohiles
http://virped.org/
Isn’t rape mostly a function of power and violence, not sex?
NOT gonna click those links.
NOT gonna speculate on what kind of search revived this zombie.
For williamapercy.com–
For virped.org–
That’s what a lot of feminists would have you believe. It’s nonsense, of course. People who are into power and violence comment crimes like robbery and carjacking.
The prophet Mohammed did …(PBUH) … even married her.
Ask Woody Allen
Never underestimate the human capacity for self-delusion and convincing oneself the universe is the way that makes you fit, especially if oneself be damaged to begin with. There are those convinced that the child’s “consent” is valid and willing, they are persecuted and misunderstood, and it’s somehow morally right or at least “not so wrong” that they should seek to consummate it. Then there are those who don’t care if it’s right or wrong and just want to get off.
As mentioned there also are those who when aware of pedophillic ideation try to figure out a way to not act upon it while still assuring themselves they are merely abnormal, not evil. However they have to live in an environment in which many people believe that itself is delusional.
And rape.