So 50% non-white is the highest you’ll go? Do you require a hypothetical potential date to present their 23 and me ancestry chart to make sure?
I haven’t read the entire thread, so I don’t know whether this question has come up:
Would you prefer a woman with a penis or a man with a vagina?
There are definitely Black and/or Asian women who have whatever set of physical features you find attractive in White women, whether that’s light hair, blue eyes, pale skin, whatever combo you like…
unless the “features” are “is not Black or Asian”, there will be Black and Asian women who have them.
No. I only stated what was likely in actual practice. As I wrote, “never say never”. I wouldn’t reject anyone a priori because of their racial makeup. I was only stating who I would be likely to be attracted to based on prior experience.
I believe you, and again like I said, I would “never say never”, but I suspect these are few and far between. (BTW, when I mentioned whites above, I meant that in a broad sense, to include for example Latinas or Persian women).
Of course not Black ones though.
Well, if they look black…
Have you considered the possibility that you may have unconsciously internalized some of the racial biases, appearance-based and otherwise, that exist in broader society and serve the cause of subtly reinforcing superiority and inferiority?
I seriously doubt it. I treat all people equally, regardless of their prior race, and am happy to have friends of color and to see people of color succeed. For example, I think it’s way cool that the USA has had a biracial president as well as that the current Vice President is both a person of color and a woman.
We are talking about pure aesthetics in the circumscribed context of what I find attractive in a partner. I am a highly visual person. I’m also a highly detail-oriented person. It’s the little things that tend to matter individually to me more than the whole. My idea of aesthetic and physical attractivity may have been influenced by being white myself and by being around whites/white media, but it’s formed and not likely to change. Like I already said, I am not a priori refusing to date any race. It’s always a hypothetical; I’m just saying that in practice, it’s mostly white (or white-looking) women that possess the features that I find attractive. Like I said, I would also not feel in the least bit discriminated or insulted if a person of color thought that I, and all the other white people in the world, were ugly and reminded them more of morlocks than of humans. Everyone can have a certain aesthetic standard and this in and of itself has no bearing on how you see a race as a whole.
Are they random? This is a general question. I assume studies have been made about what contributes to preferences.
Except in the real world, and not fiction, that’s not actually how colourism works.
Whites see white features as ideal. PoC also see them that way - that’s why hair straighteners and skin lighteners are a thing.
I very much doubt that. Especially when it’s a shared cultural aesthetic and not an individual one. Colourism is a real thing, and it does have a bearing on how races are seen. There is little “in and of itself” independent of that.
nm
~Max
OK, maybe, but again speaking only for myself, I am no fan of the things you mention (hair straighteners and skin lighteners.) I am very much in favor of embracing one’s racial features and things like the “natural hair movement” among Black women.
Your colourism may well be a real thing, but you shouldn’t assume that aesthetic preferences can’t be divorced from substantial racial prejudices. I still maintain that merely not finding a person with certain racial features as attractive as someone with other racial features doesn’t mean that that person is a bigot or that their aesthetic preferences must be colored by societal racial prejudices.
If you’ve read all my posts in this thread, you wouldn’t make such an ignorant post - I’ve very clearly said that aesthetic preferences can be so divorced. I even gave my own preferences as an example.
But they’re usually not.
…but it’s still a safe way to bet.
This may be disproportionately true, but, of course, it is not true of all people.
I suppose some questions do not yield to too much thinking about them.
See post above yours.
Sure. But when this was posted:
Your response was dismissive. But in fact, while colourism might be more likely to be one sided, @themapleleaf is stating a scenario that DOES happen. And they are quite right; they have no right to be offended by someone finding white features unattractive or not wanting to date white people.
I have no right to take issue with anyone being sexually unattracted to me for any reason whatsoever. No one does.
Right, you’re 100% free to write “No Jews” or “No Blacks” on your dating profile, but don’t act all shocked that people suspect that you’re a racist shit.
I said I wasn’t going to, but screw it. I think I can direct this reply to @RickJay as well.
Thoughts lead to actions, and where do you draw the line?
The person tells you you are ugly to your face. You ask why, they say it’s because of your skin color. Is that bigotry?
Suppose that person doesn’t want to go on a date with you because of the color of your skin is unattractive to them. Is that bigotry?
Suppose that person doesn’t want to hug you at your mother’s funeral because deep down, they think your skin color looks ugly. Is that bigotry?
You’re chatting with friends and this person comes up to invite people to her party. “Oh, but not you, themapeleaf. No whites allowed.” You ask why not, she replies that she doesn’t think people with light skin are attractive and only wants attractive people at her party. Is that bigotry?
This person works as a casting director at a local playhouse or something. It is literally her job to determine who is and is not attractive enough for a role (assume the source material does not specify skin color or race). She refuses to hire you because all other things equal you have light skin and she thinks light skin is inherently unattractive. Is that bigotry?
Alternately she chooses another equally qualified applicant for the job because they are friends with good chemistry. But they became friends at that party you were expressly disinvited from due to your skin color*. Is that bigotry?
You are accused of a crime, and there is some evidence against you. It’s a real toss up. This lady is on the jury who ultimately decides you are guilty because, unconsciously, she is sympathetic with attractive people. And she thinks your skin color is unattractive. Is that bigoted?
&etc.
~Max
* I think this is even more prevalent for women in business who run into a “good ol’ boys club”, who aren’t invited due to their sex, and thus don’t establish those close friendships
That’s a crude and horrible thing to do no matter the reason.
Depends what you mean by bigotry. Whatever your definition, it is absolutely their right to do that, full stop. Your first question was “where do you draw the line” and that’s a very easy line to define; you define the line as being a person’s sexual autonomy. Everything on their side is their decision to make. As long as they are not violating another person’s sexual autonomy - rape, pedophilia, etc. - they may choose who they want to sleep with, or choose to sleep with no one. Their reasons are their own.
As to inviting a person to a party or not, or choosing people to hire into jobs, or making decisions as a jury member, that has nothing to do with sexual preference and a person’s sexual autonomy. Racism in those contexts is morally repugnant and, in two of those cases, usually illegal or unethical. The thread is about sexual preference, not employment law.