Do you dress and groom for yourself or for others?

In My Humble Opinion
161

I love to dress. I love feeling feminine. Most days I wear a simple dress. In the summer, summer dresses, in the winter, long sleeve dresses with tights. I get lightly made fun of, like do you even own pants? I do! I just like to feel pretty. I am almost 50 so don’t really care about what others think, but I do like to look in the mirror and be pleased at what I see.

You will never see me in sweatpants out of the house. Last two years I finally started wearing sweatshirts occasionally. But not my preference.

162

I don’t much notice what other people wear, either. Funny anecdote:

I was hosting a square dance caller, and driving him around to various local events. As we returned from one event, he asked me, “who was the guy in the plaid shirt?”

I dunno, i didn’t notice what people were wearing
But there was only one guy in a plaid shirt. Who was it?
How tall was he? How old? How heavy? How well did he dance?
He was the only one in a plaid shirt.

This went on for a while, with both of us talking post each other and getting progressively frustrated with each other.

163

My problem is the opposite.

At a party I can describe what everyone was wearing. And identify them that way later during that same event. The difficulty is that the next time I see them, they’ll be wearing different clothes and I’ll have no idea who they are or whether they were at the party.

Same thing happens to me at trade shows, conventions, etc. Folks I met yesterday or ate dinner with are totally memorable. If wearing the same clothes. If not, not.

This social defect of mine has it’s awkward side-effects. Cannot recommend.

164

Well, while not being a hardcore clothes horse or a fashion guy (I’m a blue-collar worker), I do agree that the appropriate clothing for the situation is de rigueur.

As to the question in the thread title? I suppose it’s for me, really. When socializing, I know when and where to wear a navy blazer, which kind of sportcoat, or even a safari-type jacket, which trousers, which shoes, which tie and how to correctly tie it at the precise length. When and where a suit is required, and the necessity of correct tailoring.

Grooming? Well, I think society in the US has taken some pretty large steps in recent decades, towards a kind of “manscaped” carefully “scruffy” look, if not the actual lumberjack or the hipster moustache (I’m very proud that I followed through upon losing a bet at work with wearing a John Waters moustache, using an eyebrow pencil and everything…looked…“good” Maybe not Chuck E Cheese table for one good, but it was kind of fun!).

I personally follow the lead on this one, and while I can give myself an extremely close shave with a safety razor and some platinum blades, most days I just give a trim around the “beard” line (beardlet?). Shave it clean every few weeks or so when an actual beard is pretty much full-on.

Dental hygiene I do for myself, 100%…I don’t give a damn if people think my breath is wolf or not, but I’m old enough to that it’s wise, in my case at least, to mitigate receding gums with regular use of the waterpik, scrupulous flossing, and proper use of the toothbrush.

I did enjoy appearing in court several times (as a defendant) last year and, without fail, someone or other (a clerk, another lawyer, some random person) would ask “who are you representing?” or just “are you a lawyer?”). That was just wearing a tweed jacket, or a navy blazer, some kind of wool trousers, leather shoes, and a tie.

Is it for me or for others? I don’t know. Personally, I don’t much care for most people, and often outright despise them, but I think decorum is important for some abstract idea, I suppose. I know what’s right and I cleave to the standard.