I’m leaning that baby back. I do make sure to be upright for meals, takeoff and landing, but in between, it’s reclinesville. If someone were to ask me nicely, I might recline less. Ask rudely, and I’m reclined for the whole trip, including meals.
JetBlue seems to have addressed this problem, since their seats have the seat come forward while the back reclines. It has the advantage of restoring some of the legroom to the person behind you, and giving you a bit more recline.
I generally glance back to see if the person behind me will have room for me to lean back, but I’ve never asked for permission.
I’m also incredibly annoyed by the seat-grabbers, since most of them go for the middle of the headrest and don’t seem to look before they do it, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had them grab my hair in the process. Not nice, people. I understand if you need a little extra leverage to get yourself unwedged there, but hello? Don’t pull my hair while you’re doing it, thanks.
I find seats of all kinds to be fairly annoying, be they in cars, buses, or airplanes, so I’m always fiddling with the seat position and my own in order to find something marginally comfortable. I always grab a pillow or three from attendants to adjust the padding because most seats are shaped exactly the opposite of my natural spinal curve. I need lumbar support and my shoulder blades go back, dammit.
That means I’m reclining the seat when and wherever I feel like it.
Twice I’ve had the person behind me shove my seat forward-- and twice I’ve stood up, turned around, and told the person to cool it. (I do a great “very mean person” acting job.)