[QUOTE=You]
Anaamika said the rude person said “I DON’T READ!”, whereas the others all modified (ostensibly the same sentiment) into “I don’t really have time to read”. Seeing as I “DON’T WATCH TV!”, I would have to modify that into a lie (“I don’t really have time to watch tv”) in order not to be rude.
[/QUOTE]
Mika suggested instead of loudly declaring “I DON’T READ!” you can say for example “I don’t really have time,” or give no explanation at all, and just say “Reading isn’t really my thing.” Then you asked why lie? I really don’t see how either of those is a lie (I mean, unless it’s a lie). If you don’t have time, you don’t have time, and if you do but just don’t feel like it, her other example of “Reading isn’t really my thing” is a pretty straightforward way of telling someone you don’t read without being a loud douchebag about it. Also, you’re right, it is indeed possible to say you don’t read without seeming rude. I don’t think the point was the words “I don’t read” themselves are inherently bad in that order. It was the tone, and in her example she said the person loudly proclaimed it, with all caps for emphasis and all. Kind of douchey.
So if you don’t read a lot and someone is talking to you about books, “I don’t really read,” or “Reading isn’t my thing,” “I don’t read much,” or just plain “I don’t read” are fine. Making a loud pronouncement about it makes you seem like kind of a jerk. Same goes for making sure the entire room knows you don’t even own a TV and that you bicycle everywhere around town.
Live TV is still a thing you know. I know I can just DVR something and watch it later, but if watching TV and a show I want to watch is on right now, why wouldn’t I watch it live and just live with the commercials?
Sometimes even commercials can be amusing. O noes!
gracer, NitroPress, it’s not WHAT you say, but HOW you say it that matters. If you simply say, “Meh, I don’t really watch tv all that much”, that’s one thing. But DON’T do so in a way that implies that the person who does is somehow beneath you.
It’s not about watching TV. It’s implying that said person is stupid for doing any particular activity. Substitute knitting/biking/reading/painting/ziplining, whatever for TV, and it’s still the same.
But don’t be surprised if you smugly refer to something as the “idiot box” and people think you’re acting like an ass. If you don’t get that why that is, well, I can’t help you.
I think the rudeness is in the caps. I can see someone saying “I don’t read” politely, and “I DON’T READ” obnoxiously. But what we’re getting here, and in real life is more, “Why would anyone ever waste time reading. I don’t,” which is a different matter altogether.
I don’t watch TV. I haven’t voluntarily watched it for four or five years, and I watched very little of it in the years before that. When I was a kid, I watched as much as my parents would let me watch.
Why? Well, it’s based on what I remember from when I did watch and on what I see when I have to watch it, such as when I’m caught in a waiting room with it running. All that I’ve seen leads me to conclude that television is extremely stupid and most of it is immoral. It’s called “the idiot box” for a reason. No matter whether I’m watching the Super Bowl or Fox News Channel or The Big Bang Theory, it all looks to be like nasty, idiotic crap. That’s what I feel based on what I’ve seen; needless to say, I haven’t seen every show in existence. Perhaps some things on TV would be an intellectual challenge to Einstein and morally uplifting to Mother Teresa, but I can only judge based on what I’ve seen.
I have no need to rub my opinions in anyone else’s face. I don’t mention my feelings about TV unless someone forces the issue on me. When I first met my fiance, she was determined to turn me into a TV watcher, and it took a few major arguments before she accepted that she wouldn’t succeed. Her mother still thinks that it’s arrogant of me to not watch TV, to which I respond with a shrug.
People who proudly declare that they don’t watch TV remind me of people who self-righteously brag about how little they spent on their wedding.
“My wedding only cost $1,000!”
“Oh yeah? Well we had ours in a Chick-fil-A and it only cost $423!”
“WHAT?! You spent way too much! I wore a burlap sack as a wedding dress and people paid ME to come to my wedding!”
Um, that’s great for you, but it’s not a contest. I watch a lot of TV and I had an expensive wedding. And I enjoy(ed) the hell out of both.
I know a guy who doesn’t watch TV or have one, but he is Amish and they generally do not watch TV if they don’t have to. He’s not really snobbish about it - he and his wife feel that it provides no benefit and is potentially dangerous (i.e. bad TV shows). He doesn’t use the Internet either but will use a regular phone.
The thing is, I think you can have the right tone to actually give your opinion on tv as well. Like NitroPress’s opinion. NitroPress is expressing a personal opinion, and expressing it in an appropriate situation, because it’s not like he started a thread to say how everyone who watches tv is retarded.
It’s just an opinion, like we have tons of opinions about things people do. It sounds like snobbery because apparently it applies to you. But you could just choose to take it as an interesting opinion, and debate it.
Here you go: in general, I think doing short trips by car is bad thing. I think people should drink fewer soft drinks. I think smoking is anti-social. I think eating too much red meat is bad for the environment. I think not recycling is irresponsible. Tons of opinions about things other people do, choices other people make. I won’t think people who choose to live drinking a liter of coke a day are terrible people. I’ll just think that’s not a good decision. In a conversation, I can easily express those views and allow for debate on the topic, without actually being rude.
Looking down on people is kind of relative. In a way you could say I look down on people for loads of reasons. At the same time I actually take people as they come. I really do believe that everyone is fighting their own battle, and that you never know what the journey of another person is all about. This can be perfectly true all at once. So if you say you do meth, I will think it’s a bad decision and I will think you are on a hard road fighting your own battles. And I will respect that. And if you watch 4 hours of tv a day I will think you are wasting your time, but it’s your choice, on your journey and I will respect that.
Go back and read what NitroPress says. It’s all “I think everything on tv is worthless junk”, he never actually says “you are worthless junk because you watch tv”. So debate the opinion, rather than climbing into your castle and defending yourself shouting about his snobbery. He just has an opinion. Granted, that opinion would be inappropriate to express in lots of situations. And on the internet it’s hard to gather tone. But the exact things he says could be a great conversation in a bar. In fact, the language he uses (“idiot box”) would make it a lively and colourful debate.
Hence: complaining about snobbery when people are just expressing an opinion makes for a dull conversation. Lighten up a little.