Do You Think Rich People Would Send Me A Million Dollars If I wrote Them This?

I have been kicking this idea around. Rich people have more money than they could ever spend right? You know people like Gates, Buffet,the Walton clan and many others. What if I wrote them this letter.

Dear Mr or Ms. Rich Person:

You have done an incredible job in your life establishing great wealth for yourself. And the reason you are so wealthy is because you enjoy your work. Which makes it fun everyday for you to go in and tackle the days challenges and make more money. But see I don’t like work that much I do it just so I can provide for my family and have fun on the weekends.

Leisure and fun do not hold the same apple to your eye like it does to some people(like me). Now to get to the point. I have noticed you have more money than you could possibly spend in a life time. So why not send me a Million dollars. I could have soooo much fun with that kind of cash infusion. This would be a lot better thing to do with some of that extra cash instead of buying art or something.

I would buy a house on Lake Travis with a boat launch for both a Cigarrete boat and Malibu Wakesetter(wakeboarding boat) and wakeboard everyday. Of course, I would invest the rest of the money in your company(the right thing to do since you gave me the money and all) so I could buy gas and food with the dividend checks. I would wake up every morning eat a good breakfast then hit the lake to pratice the sport of wakeboarding. I could probably get pretty good since that would be my job and all. So you could really look at me like you are my sponsor. I, of course, we would wear your companies logo on just about everything.

I know you probably think this is a crazy idea just to give someone a million bucks but it would make me very happy and heck you can afford it. And you would probably feel good too you know like that old TV show where the old rich guy went around giving people money. You can be a young rich guy giving me money.

Plus I would send you pictures of us having fun on the lake kinda like those charities that send you pictures of the people they feed in foreign countries. But see the difference is that you are invited anytime well with a little notice to come out and spend the day on the lake with us. We are a fun family.

Anyway, do something crazy with some of your fortune I would really appreciate it & you only live once. Every day when your at the office doing all the work thing you can think about you prodige’(sp) having fun wakeboarding on Lake Travis. :smiley:

Worth a try isn’t it?

I’ll bet they get a hell of a lot of begging letters. Even if they don’t have a ‘all begging letters go in the bin’ rule, you’d have to be certain that this letter was the best begging letter in the whole world, bar none. This letter has to be The One, the one that the secretary reads and can’t help but rush in to Bill Gates yelling “This one’s priceless, you HAVE to read it”. And then of course, Mr Gates has to be impressed enough to actually give you the money, and not just say “Yeah, that’s a good begging letter, as begging letters go”.

There are longer shots in the world, but that is one of the longer ones.

I was the personal assistant to a CEO of a major underwear manufacturer.

My job was to weed through these letters carefully and then just as carefully throw them away. I probably read 15 of them a day, and this wasn’t even the most famous of millionaires, not even the most famous in CHICAGO.

They begged for money for medicine for their children, for a new house, for college, for their upcoming wedding. It’s all the same…it’s begging, and they don’t buy into it.


Gee, Bill, I’m not a gazillionaire, but I’m so moved, I’m just going to have my paycheck deposited in your account. Do send me the pertinent account numbers so I can get this set up post haste.

I doubt you’ll have much luck, Bill. Heck, I’ve been writing to rich people for the last month just asking for a job and so far I’ve come up empty.

Still, just remember that if you do get lucky, you’re hosting the next dopefest!


Cool. I’ll send ya and e-mail with all the pertinent info. :smiley:

And on the dopefest sure I’ll ask ole Gates to kick in a little more cash so we can have a good one.

Wildest Bill: Congratulations! I think you’ve invented a whole new category of spam:

This is simultiously: spam(unwanted e-mail), glurge(I need money to spend time with my children), a beg letter (I want money), kind of a “make $$$money$$$ fast!” letter (in reverse: “Give money fast! You’ll feel better”) and a sort-of backhanded-flame (“You rich folks don’t enjoy leisure and family”)

Actually, I’m kind of impressed! :slight_smile:

However, and let me be completely, absolutly, utterly clear that I am kidding: If I start getting variations of this in my mailbox under a header like “GIVE $$$MONEY$$$ NOW!”, I’m going to hunt you down and make you write “I will not invent new varieties of spam” a thousand times.

:smiley: :wink:


Are you sure that you’re a Republican? With the “something for nothing” mentality you keep exhibiting, as exemplified by the Mexican fatburners, your steroids thread, and the OP here, you seem a lot more like a lefty. Why on Earth should anyone just hand you a million dollars so you can amuse yourself? Are we going to be seeing you on the sidewalk rattling coins in a paper cup?

Begging is just so…so… gauche!


Yea, I am a republican and righty well except when it comes to writing I do that with my left hand. I don’t believe we should money to g the govt and have them dish it out to whoever. Now as far as a rich guy just wanting to help an inspiring wakeboarder there is nothing political about that. Steroids being legal or not what does that have to with being a republican?

One day I might achieve my dream to live on Lake Travis problem is I will probably be to old to enjoy it like it is meant to be enjoyed. So I thought Gates is not going to ever be able to use all that cash why not just give me a million of it if he wants to of course. I thought it was worth a shot?

Allow me to point out the parallels in a way in which even you may comprehend.
Taking “Mexican fatburners” = fat-loss without work
Taking steroids = gaining muscle without work
Begging money from Bill Gates = Living on Lake Travis without work. In all three cases, you wish to receive something without putting in the necessary effort.

You want things handed to you without working for them. It’s the same mindset as some guy in Anacostia who is all about “gettin’ paid” but without wanting to work for the things he wants or some Skid Row wino who’d rather rattle coins in a paper cup than take a job at the McDonald’s right behind him.

The Republican philosophy, as I understood it, used to be self-reliance and no handouts from the government. The Democrats, however, believe that government intervention is required to redistribute wealth. You, by wanting to beg money from the wealthy, have a lot more in common with the Democrats than the Republicans.

Whether it is the government or a rich individual giving you the money is immaterial. You are still receiving a handout taken from someone else.

Ok, Goboy lets have a debate in IMHO this should be fun.

Not true you have to put up with sides(not easy ya know shakes feeling weird)you still have to watch what you eat and you still have to do cardio. The only thing mexican fat burners do is help you speed up the process. You know you could go out raise and kill your own cow but it is more efficient to buy a steak from the store. It is called progress.

This statement is totally erroneous. You do not take steroids and all of sudden you get big and muscle bound. This is propaganda from the govt. You have to work out just as hard probably harder on juices. Roids just allow you to lift heavier weight than normal and it repairs yours muscles faster therefor you can build more muscle faster. If it was easy as sticking a needle in your butt and you look like Arnold, more people would be using them now wouldn’t they. I mean why drive a car to work when you could run. Technology that’s why a better way to get there was invented. That is what roids are - technology. And you do have to work HARD to get big. (Not that I know from first experience or anthing. :wink: )

I don’t consider what I asked for as begging. It was asking him to sponsor a maybe a future wakeboard champion. Remember I said I would put his name and logo all over my stuff. :wink:

Disagree. I work out(if I used gear hypothetically of course) harder than if I didn’t use gear. I have to put of with sides with the fat burners plus I have to diet. Third I would have to put forth the effort to write gates in the first place that takes initiative and creativity.


You are just totally wrong on this statement. It is very material. That is the one of the biggest difference between liberals and conservative. Liberals want the govt to decide how to divvy up charity. Conservative want to leave that up to the indiduals who made the money to give it out the way they see fit. The big difference you see is the rich guy EARNED the money. So he should be able to do with it what he wishes.

The government on the other hand doesn’t earn SQUAT it just taxes what other people earn. And the other big point I am not taking anything he(Gates) is making a gift the way he sees fit to give. He was not made to give anything totally his choice.

That still constitutes fast (and dangerous) results, taking the easy road. By the way, if you are having shakes and “feeling weird,” you would do well to see a doctor. I’ll bet you are damaging your heart with that mess.

Ditto for steroids. You are trying to do something faster than you would by going slowly and building muscle the right way. BTW, you must be aware of how dangerous steroids are and the consequences of long-term abuse. When you come down with liver cancer or have a stroke you are 50, don’t come crying to me.

I acknowledge the point about coerced versus voluntary giving, but you are still begging money. How does that make you different from a panhandler by the train station?

*Originally posted by goboy

And jogging fast can result in a nasty fall and your point is. :wink:

Another doctor ahhhhh. btw I didn’t say those were my symptoms necessarily. :smiley:

There is no documented proof of liver damage with injectable steroid only the 17aa orals. And that was over extended use inotherword the user abused the drug. And if you abuse anything, it will usually hurt you. If I were to do roids, I would do them(injectables) only in short intervals and take milk thistle to help with the liver. In the research I have done I have not seen any real documented proof that roids are as bad as the media and the govt would have you believe. Remember they are illegal because of sports matter of fact the AMA did not think they should be illegal.

Really? Cool. :smiley:

First, I am a more classier beggar than the panhandler. :wink: Second, The panhandler doesn’t put my coporate logo on his pan. :smiley: ::thinking about it I don’t think I would want him too::

I have a feeling you’re in for yet another Pit thread, Bill.

I mean, I don’t see what you do to deserve a handout from Bill Gates? And yet, someone who is struggling to keep food on the table doesn’t deserve a little help from the government.

Taxes-don’t you think the government should be PAID for what they do? I mean, the individuals-that’s their job. Shouldn’t they get paid for that?

Originally posted by Guinastasia

Why what did I do now? Me and goboy are just having a pleasant discussion. We are both calm and cool. We cool.

I didn’t say I deserved handout I just thought it would be cool if I got one. And if someone is having trouble putting food on their table, sure I don’t mind helping them out. But if you let the govt do it they waste alot and their is more corruption. Churches would be better for the job of charity.

What kind of jobs are you talking about? Building roads, protecting the country stuff like that sure. Govt beauracracy no way.

Please define “government bureaucracy.” Does that include paying 600 dollars for toilet seats worth about 25 dollars?
Seriously, Bill, yes, churches are always helpful, but charity isn’t the only thing-government job training and such is important. We pay taxes-is it too much to ask for something in return?

Geeze, Bill, you probably make more money than me-can you give me some? I mean, I could really use it!

Hmm, I’m going to have to go with Bill here goboy. Surely the fat-burners are analagous to capital in this system. It is not only physical labour that has value.

Someday I will write a letter to a billionare, and it will go like this:

Can I have a nickel?

I think it will work but only one way.

So here is the plan.

“synergistic perfected timing”

Most rich people will toss your letter for one of two reasons. First they worked hard to get that money and think you should too. Second they did not work hard for the money, but work hard to keep it.

The ones that got rich by being born or some other twist of fate will never give you money. In my experience they are extremely paranoid about loosing money. It could be that they did not create the wealth and understand they cannot get it back when it’s gone.

So single out the self-made rich, all but one or two of them will toss your letter straight away due to the work hard factor.

The two shots you have need to be placed with precision.

You will need to get your letter to the subject on the day they get diagnosed with a rapidly progressing terminal illness. The tricky part is that they also need to have just had a nasty falling out with all likely airs, and are distraught about what to do with the estate.

When all of these things happen with “synergistic perfected timing” you will not only get the million but you will get it many times over.

You will be in a state of panic but something will guide you to divide the money with me 50/50. Your friends and relatives will violently oppose this but your gut will scream at you to do it.

I will take my 50% and relocate to the desert.

Believe it or not, Bill Gates and Microsoft is one of my companies biggest clients.
Trust me, he’s not giving you anything!
Try that Warren Buffet jerk. Tell him that Bush’s tax cuts for the rich have devestated you economicaly. Mix in some crap about how you are no longer able to donate to liberal causes. If this works, you owe me 25% finders fee :smiley: