NPR’s “All Things Considered” tonight had a story about a married couple - amateur sociologists, if you will. At any restaurant, he (or she) will compliment a nearby diner on the food on the diner’s plate: “Oooh, that looks good.” After a brief conversation, he will ask, “May I have a taste?” The great majority of the time, they’ve found, the diner will agree - often by offering a bite on the diner’s own fork.
That really surprised me. I’d never let a stranger taste my food on my fork, because of germs, and would be pretty hesitant about offering a stranger a bite even with his own fork (or spoon). Seems pretty rude and intrusive to even be asked. I only offer bites of food to close friends or family members, and usually then only if (a) that person doesn’t have much (or any) food of his or her own, or (b) what I’m eating is so damned good that I just have to share the deliciousness.
Some other variables occur to me. Does it matter if the stranger is young and/or attractive? Or if you have a very big serving? How about if the restaurant is particularly swanky? (The couple has noticed that people are more likely to share in fancy restaurants, where the other diner perhaps gets an ego boost by being able to share a bite of a fine, expensive dish).
Simple answer, probably not.
Detailed answer, if I were with a friend or two, and the friendly stranger was of the non threatening variety, and the conversation was interesting or at least pleasant, I might, provided there was an unused fork or spoon on the table, and depending on what I was eating (it might be the sort of meal about which I’d feel extremely greedy
However, if the stranger walked over and said only “looks good, may I taste?” I’d give him a :dubious: look, and tell him what I’d ordered, and perhaps he should try it next time he visits this restaurant.
That’s probably illegal and frowned upon in most establishments.
But seriously, depending on the appearance of the person (homeless bum? respectable businessman? street hooker?) I would probably let them. I would prefer that they use their own utensils, but that’s not a requirement.
I’ll happily share with my dining companions, assuming they’re my friends or family. But strangers will definitely not get anything off my plate. I’d think them awfully weird just for asking.
How about the converse -
Would you go up to a total stranger in a dining establishment, assuming of course you are intrigued by his or her meal, and request a taste?
I wouldn’t.
Reading the thread line, my immediate thought was that there was absolutely no way that I’d ever let a stranger taste my meal. Then the OP raised the possibility of an attractive stranger and I have to admit that if an good looking woman was flirting with me I would probably share my food with her if she asked. Which just goes to prove once again that your perspective on the exchange of bodily fluids depends all in who you’re going to be exchanging them with. Acts which sound disgusting in principle can seem quite intriguing if performed with the right partner.
Many years ago at a McDonald’s, some mook walked up to the table I was sitting at and started helping himself to my fries. I yelled for the manager and raised hell until he was thrown out. In retrospect, I felt bad about it because he was probably a bit demented, and I’m not sure now why I got so incensed over it, but I did. Another time a guy wanted to sit down and start prosyletizing to me at a Wendy’s. Apparently, he assumed that because I was sitting by myself in a fast food joint at 9PM, reading a magazine, I was somehow in despair over my lonely life or something.
I’m fairly sure that my chances of catching a disease from some random person taking a single bite of my food are next to zero, so in principle I’d allow it, but I’d think a total stranger asking for a bite is fairly odd, much less doing the sorts of things I just decribed above. I’d probably refuse simply because I might then be seen as open to even more intrusive attempts at interaction and just don’t want to deal with it.
I actually thought about this question for a bit before responding. I wouldn’t WANT to say yes, but there is a reflexive politeness issue that crops up, which causes people to say yes to outrageous requests when they are phrased with enough balls. What would I do?
I think I’d say, “Are you seriously asking me if you can taste my food? I don’t even know you.” I doubt most people would persist in their request if someone pointed out how weird it was. If they did, I’d say, “I don’t think so. Sorry.” Because it’s creepy.
If the person seemed genuinely interested, I’d probably let them have a taste, but request that they use their own (presumably clean) utensils.
About fifteen years ago I was in a bar and the guy next to me, a stranger, ordered a bottle of some obscure beer I’d never heard of. I asked him about it, and we got to chatting about beer, and when his beer arrived, he offered me a taste of it before he’d even tasted it himself. I wasn’t sure what was going on, so I brought it up near my lips and then hesitated while looking at him questioningly. He said, “Yeah, go ahead!” so I took a drink out of his beer. Seemed weird to me, but OK.
If they used a clean utensil then sure. If not I might cave in and say yes anyway though out of my politeness-programming encountering a ‘does not compute’ moment.
I’m always impressed by people who have the balls to do things I would never do. Asking for a bite off a stranger’s plate (if I wasn’t already engaged in conversation with them - at this point they aren’t so much of a stranger) is one of those things I would never do. Therefore, if someone did it to me, I would be impressed, probably laugh mightily, and then oblige.
I’m still reeling from the time the waitress sat down at the table with us and flirted with my boyfriend…eight years ago.
If I were quick-thinking, I’d smile and tell the stranger he’d just have to order his own, but that it was delicious. If I were bowled over by the effrontery of it, I’d either stammer out a ‘yes’ or a ‘no,’ but I sure don’t know which.
