Twice, even.
Esprix
{sighs}
You guys aren’t helping! 
“What do you do in your spare time?”
“I collect stamps”
“I build and paint models”
“I fly a plane.”
“I collect old vinyl records.”
“I have a commited, long-term relationship with a boyfriend. We share our lives together. We go out to dinner and movies. We talk a lot – communication is important. Sometimes we argue, especially about money. We’ll have our commitment ceremony in July. I also make model ships in bottles.”
“Wow, you need to get out more.”
:rolleyes:
Carry on.
Manda JO,
You know, I think you’ve hit on what, at least for me, is the cause of my negative feelings towards promiscuity. When someone seems to be sleeping with many other people for a reason other than that he or she just enjoys it; that’s when it starts to seem icky, unhealthy, or just sad to me.
These are all I can find regarding number of sexual partners for gay men.
http://www.sigmaresearch.org.uk/articles92b.html
http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/00000897.htm
The Sigma one is for the UK, and we all know the CDC.
I imagine gay men have about as many different sex partners as straight men would if they lived on a planet where
- women never got pregnant
- women wanted to have sex for the same reasons that men do
- women were socialized to have as much sex as men
- there was no evolutionary history pushing women to go for commitment over one-night stands
- their subculture did not identify casual sex as wrong
- nobody called them names if they had a dozen different guys in a weekend
There were a hell of a lot more bathhouses for gay men than there were for lesbians. So for at least some gay men, anomymous sex was a higher priority than for practically any women.
FWIW.
Regards,
Shodan
Shodan, right on! I was thinking that, and the AGE FACTOR. In the other thread, I said that nearly all of the gay people I know are relationship-oriented. However, these people are all over 40. I was a bit of a wild child myself in my younger days, but that lifestyle no longer interests me.
Sadly, when I was young and wild, ALL my gay friends and acquaintances died. It was only maybe 5 people – but they all died of sexually-contracted AIDS. Sucks, don’t it?
shodan - quite insightful. I’m impressed.
Esprix
Haish, I tihnk you have misunderstood me: I was talking about sex, not relationships. The point I was trying to make was that as homosexual sex does not carry the risk of pregnancy, it can be a hobby without any negitive repercussions. That dosen’t mean that that is all it can be, but the option is there, whereas heterosexual sex always carries with it the prospect of creating a new person.
And yes, when promiscious sex is healthy, I would describe it as a hobby. I don’t think that is trivilizing relationships, because I’m specifically talking about sex that occurs outside of any relationship.
Good heavens, Esprix and EchoKitty -
I am no longer a SDMB-compliment virgin.
Imagine how I must feel! Thanks!
Regards,
Shodan the Attention Whore
Okay, it wasn’t clear. I’ve heard homosexuality described as a “hobby” as a way of belittling our relationships (like the word “lifestyle”), which is why I was upset.
Damn, Shodan made my point for me 
Yep, I think that it has to do with 2 main things.
Firstly, you have to think back to the “birth of the modern gay community”, so we are talking early sixties. HIV isnt on the scene. Sure, you can get a dose of the clap, but hey, the doctor has a great cream (or something) for that. Noone is getting pregnant, noone is going to keep calling you or expect anything more than some fun in the bushes. You have the oppertunity for purely recreational sex, no strings attached. If you want. Many do.
I think part of it is also this thing of social conditioning. I know at least where I am from (good old catholic ireland) girls are more or less taught that “nice girls dont like sex”, and sure as heck dont get horny, and even if they do, they sure dont initiate it. That they are to be the brake pedal to the guys gas pedal. Guys as the gas pedal are expected and conditioned that if getting laid isnt always the number one subject on their mind then there must be something wrong with them (hahah like being gay 
).
In the same way you have the stereotype of promisquous gay males, you have the stereotype of lesbian-bed-death and as with the above stereotype, there is some fire to the smoke. You get two “brake pedals” in the one room, its gonna take a little more time to get things moving, conversley, two gas pedals? vroom!
Its late, thats the best suggestion I have. That its to do with the social conditioning guys recieved. For the record I have never heard a straight male recieve negative comments regarding the (high) amount of notches on their belts. Only “you go dude” praise.