Dr Phil, SHUT UP!

Ahhhh but if sense was common, none of us would have to be told these moronic things.

or Gilligan, or Daisy Duke, or the dead, or odd shaped rocks, or Magic 8 balls, or even Norm Abrams…


maybe Doctor Who…

Hence, I give you * The Dr. Phil Show. *

The best part is that the quotes are taken out of context:

“You want a piece of me…”

“I want to be Miss America…”

“You Bastard…”

As for Dr. Phil lookalikes:

Dr. Phil

Bobby Rahal

My favorite Dr. Who wav: “Oh, well having reached that brilliant conclusion, how about getting on with it?”

Of course, if that fails you can always turn to the Daleks:

I just got “You don’t need parmesan cheese to make a delicious fondue,” which seemed perfectly reasonable to me.

You’re thinking of character actor Jeffrey Tambor, who probably should have had his own show long before Dr. Phil.

Speaking of lookalikes :smiley:

Jim Cramer of Kudlow and Cramer
a 'bit meaner and fatter, perhaps. :wink:

Such impeccable logic, and so convincing, I almost confused it with the REAL Dr. Phil. Thanks for making my night complete, beagledave. :slight_smile:

puke stick covered in rancid ferret meat grease

Not the thing one wants to read whilst munching on buffalo wings.


For some reason, I immediately started thinking of Carey Lowell from License to Kill. What the hell is wrong with me?

Thank you BeagleDave. I feel so much better now, knowing that there is a purpose for the squishy, still warm fecal matter known as Dr. Phil. It was so we could have such a perfect cite to a site as the cite for the quote generator site. Praise be to Loki.

i got this one:

You don’t need a 50-watt light bulb to pray I leave TV and never come back.


[Dr Phil]Hi folks! Today, I thought that I’d spew out some mind-numbingly obvious statements that seem to help but are just really empty soundbites. Because, as my mom always said “Forget a brothel. If you really want to screw people out of their money, get a self-help tv show.”[/Dr Phil]
Vile, empty, pablum that helps no one.
I keep expecting some actual shrink to shoot Phil on air. At trial, they will introduce into evidence tapes of all his shows. The defendant will claim to have acted in defense of legitimate therapists(Y’know those folks who actually try to help people) and the American public. The killing will be ruled justifiable homicide.
[Dr Phil] Y’know, you don’t need me. I can do it for you. But, you can do it yourselves. All you need is a positive attitude, determination, a lit cigarette, 3 or so feet of hose, and some lube[/Dr Phil]

Yes!!:smiley: Totally!

Dude, this is just too damn funny. I won’t let it die without a fight. :smiley:

Oooh! This fits many of The Pit threads I’ve been reading:

I’m almost ready to not self mutilate my wang now everytime someone else talks about this squirming, maggot infested, small plastic bag of three month old lunch meat I found in my truck one hot summer day…

So, let me get this straight… it is generally conceded that Dr. Phil dispenses common sense. We all agree that common sense is, well, good. So it can’t be the content that is objected to, and the mockery of his folksy aphorisms leads me to conclude that he is

because you don’t enjoy his good ol’ boy persona.

Just wanted to get clear about that.

I think people are saying he DOESN’T dispense common sense, or at least the manner in which he does is pretty snarky.

At least, from what I’ve heard. YMMV.

Yes, Guin, that’s pretty much my point. I don’t believe that real psychological help can be found on a TV (or radio) show that dispenses psychobabble and pithy sayings as a cure for the problems being discussed. I think Dr. Phil is riding the Oprah induced wave of what is currently popular.

That so many people think he is so good is disturbing to my sense of what should be right.

I would love to see someone on his show tell him to just fuck off or show him that he’s wrong about something, but I try not to watch at all. So, if that does happen, would one of you tell me? Thanks