[QUOTE=Mighty_Girl]
I am proposing nothing of the sort. Nzinga, Seated said it already, but to clarify in my own words:
“The practice” can raise all kind of thoughts in eleanorigby’s mind. But I propose that all this is entirely in his/her mind.
These things (dowries, bride price, etc.) have never been part of our culture, so I have no idea where he/she got that from. It is entirely possible that she/he’s drawing these connections out of either ignorance or prejudice. I am more inclined towards ignorance.
[/QUOTE]
Please take off your defensive glasses for just a moment–I was NOT singling out Latino culture. I said I disapprove of the marking of infant girls in this way. I still say that. Merienee brought up what I thought was a good point re the marginalization of girls. (unless s/he was using hyperbole for effect and I was whooshed). That’s all. I mentioned bride price and dowries because in some OTHER cultures, baby girls do indeed wear their dowries. That point alone should have proved that I wasn’t “picking on” YOUR culture. I made a general statement about cultures. I’m sorry if you took it to mean only yours. You were mistaken.
[QUOTE=Nzinga]
…Which I think indicates some pity. I mean, when I read that she was dismayed with what OUR culture were doing to OUR babies…well, I figured she thought, what a pity…That is how I read her post.
[/QUOTE]
I do not pity your culture. Where did you get that from? I do pity baby girls who have no say in the matter of ear piercing, but as I’ve said muliple times–that is my opinion only. There are plenty of messed up things about my own culture (which you say is also yours, or was that someone else?)–please read my posts, and don’t infer things from them. FWIW, as a nurse, I can attest to the fact that infant ear piercing is done quickly, safely and most hygienically when done early in life. That said, they can and do get infected, and nickel allergy, as Guin said, CAN be a concern.
If you all would look back, you’d see that nowhere have I said that X culture is wrong for doing this. I have said, repeatedly, that it is not something I am comfortable with–from my very first post I said this. I’m not sure why you all think I am the arbiter of YOUR culture’s customs, because I’m not. I feel like I’m talking to a wall here. It’s frustrating.
[QUOTE=monstro]
I have never met a woman who wished she had never pierced her ears…Opressors!
[/QUOTE]
This is tiresome. I did not say those girls were oppressed. I did say, in agreement with Merienee, that girls are marginalized–I think this is true of all cultures, really. It’s a sad statement. And she’s absolutely correct in saying that my daughter’s (or any of our daughters) process of self-determination will always have a large cultural overtone. Well said, Merienee!
[QUOTE=monstro]
I have a feeling that all this discomfort about young kids wearing jewelry comes from some Puritanical prudishness–a feeling that earrings are associated with sex and maturity. I know a lot of people (usually whites) make earring piercings a rite of passage for teenage girls. Great. But for some cultures jewelry is just jewelry. Some people just think earrings make a little girl “cute”, along with ribbons, hairbows, and frilly skirts. Believe it or not, as a tomboy little girl, I rebelled more against the stupid clothes I had to wear than the earrings my mother made me wear.
[/QUOTE]
You’re half right. For my “people”, ear piercing is done as a right of passage. Not quite sure where the Puritanical bit comes in there-or perhaps that was an inference? It would seem that there is no honor among thieves here–I am accused of slighting whole populations and now the favor is returned because WASPS tend to mark their girls later on in life. Pot meet kettle? (the difference taht is salient to me is that the pre-teen can choose-the baby can’t…).
I came in this thread stating that infant ear piercing was most likely cultural–not mine, but others. I see your mother “made” you wear earrings–does that mean you would have preferred not too? My mother made me wear slips and MaryJanes with white anklet socks–I hated them as well.
My point (and I think yours, too) was that all choices when it comes to personal adornment are at least somewhat based on culture or at least group mores. But that doesn’t mean that such choices are moral etc. I really don’t understand this need for universal approval of customs. I said, and I repeat, I tolerate the difference. I see no reason to approve of it. And just to be clear: you all are (of course) free to disapprove, but tolerate my customs.
I hope this helps…
