Eat the Rich

Hormone Found In Rich People Linked To Longer Life

I think the implications are obvious. Clearly we must farm rich people in order to ensure a sufficient supply. Once a viable breeding stock is established, those past breeding age can be ground up in order to extract the valuable pharmacologically active substances.

Too rich for my tastes. And besides, who’s going to be able to afford to eat them?

I believe the technical name for that compound is ‘confounding factor dissolved in journalistic incompetence’.

I think your best bet is to find someone rich enough to have the hormone, but not rich enough for their own tastes, and get them to sell out, and eventually form a company that makes the stuff. Yeah, prices would be high for seven years or so, but then we’d get the generic.

Eating them is inefficient. What we need to do is strap them down and suck out what we need. Like what the Skeksis did to the Podlings in Dark Crystal. Drain their vital essence! Mwhahahaha!