Folks, this is GQ. Let’s not let rampant speculation run wild. I think it’s obvious that Ed Zotti is not Cecil. However, Cecil may, in fact, be Ed Zotti.
That’s Lois Lane, not Louis Lane.
I’d claim to be Jimmy Olson in this scenario, except that I can’t stand the little creep. Someone else can have him.
Great Cecil’s ghost!
I believe a movie has already been made loosely based on his life.
“Some things in life just can’t be explained.”
Clark Kent is Superman?!!! Jeez, thanks for the Spoiler warning, friend. Huh, some people.
Wow, you sure have an active imagination, ianzin!
According to switchboard.com, there are two Zotti’s living in Chicago.
Ed Zotti has no left hand. Poor bastard tried to catch a Viet Cong rocket back in '68. He was left handed though. Before the rocket, that is. I’m surprised you didn’t know this.
However, Ed Zotti also has no right hand, for reasons unknown.
But what about the tentacles?
ianzin, you’re right. Bad Lord Ashtar! You should get your revenge by spoiling something for him; like how David Copperfield flew for example.
I believe both tentacles are right where they should be.
For Cecil, yes. For Ed, the movie is this one
Okay, I’m sorry! I repent! For the love of God, I repent! Please don’t ruin the magic of David Copperfield! I’d have nothing left to live for!
So wait…you’re saying that Ed, and possibly Cecil, are really Dr. No??!
Some consider Ed Zotti a toed zit; others a ditz toe. Some think he just goes around writing ribald poetry such as his definitive “ode 'z tit”. Or is univerally dismissive in his claims of “zed to it!”
Cecil Adams on the other (left) hand is simply a calced sim. Some revere him and think he Is Mecca Lad, but others think he is a mecca slid; in profane words sometimes no better than a camel disc. Why, in Mexico I’ve heard some call him A Mescal Cid. He was found sometimes just walking the beach drunkenly slurring “Does anyone have a iced clams?” over and over. He would wake in the morning on the beach cold as iced clam.
He came to his senses one day, founded and grips to death the Straight Dope. It is his orated spight and his pirated ghost.
He’s been treated like shit and persevered through the hard times and his motto is now, "Caca misled, caca slimed, caca smiled, " acclaims ed.
Better that than being Ed’s back door lover.
All this talk about Ed and Cecil and hands and Superman makes me think of Christopher Reeve. And I’m going straight to hell for it.
I’m kinda bi. Bat right, use right-handed scissors, but write left. Just like Cecil, Bill Clinton, and Ross Perot.
Thanks for the sig! 