I found myself watching the Masters today and I asked myself “WHY am I watching GOLF? I never have before…”
You may have given me the answer: with politicians shouting everywhere else, I chose to watch something where no one raises their voice.
Okay, well, talk me outta this shit.
Please.
I know what “partner” feels like. This ain’t it … but I also feel so fucking OLD, and useless as a human being, and not nearly as pretty as my -ahem- perky 20-something self. And that’s without this freaky Oil Painting In The Attic shit that’s gotta expire eventually. But mostly, I don’t wanna have to … oh jeebus … explain everything.
I have mental health problems. I had them before I was widowed “too young tsk tsk and with her other stuff” and they ain’t getting better. Did you know trust issues don’t resolve when … oh fuck it.
Now I’m sobbing in my car, at a nearby park, because I’m also 8 years old, and Pokemon. And this is the closest Poke gym.
You guys. I trust my Dopers. Please give me the kick in the ass I need. I’ve not posted this pissed off stalemate enough, because reasons.
I deserve better?
No?
Cuz every time I get halfway close to sacking up (“ovum up, girl”) I think about the overwhelming odds of finding someone
1.) roughly my age*
and
2.) who can put up w my shit, there’s lot of it,
and
3.) who’s single for reasons that don’t preclude a relationship. Divorced doesn’t bother me, if you learned. But nobody I’ve met seems to learn.
I can’t take on a man-child. I need someone who can wipe their own ass. And fucking wash the dishes, if I grocery shopped and schlepped in and cooked and. And. And.
And is okay with my weird little side hobby**, and my burning desire to have a couple chickens.
- oh, jeebus, the kids younger than me. That age is increasingly decrepit. But mid 30s and younger, whaddya mean you don’t know who Nirvana is.
** involves rodents, and snakes. So un ladylike.
You definitely need a break. Can you get away for a day or two? You don’t need a kick in the ass. You’re kicking yourself. Theres nothing wrong with liking what you like, girly, youngish, tom-boyish no matter what. The heart wants what the heart wants. No need to explain, to anyone. If folks are asking you ‘why?’ Eliminate them from your circle. Quit kicking yourself.
I do get it. My issues are different than yours. And my peeps are always asking me why, why, why? I have some things I do that just drives them crazy. I know at this age I’m not changing anymore. I tell them daily to just get over it, I’m not interested in their opinions on how I can, should or try changing. Too late. This is the way I am. My near and dear loved ones have accepted it. I hope I have said something/anything that helps a bit.
Well, I heart ya, so at least you know you’re heart-able.
Also, I view you as a very strong woman, a survivor who’s endured more than I can imagine having to live through. Were I available, I’d apply for a spot on your waiting list with my head held high.
Your hobby doesn’t involve raising baby chicks to feed to rats and snakes, does it? ‘Cos eww.
You’re making me feel like watching golf… it sounds so… pacific…
Horse-foot-glove, I’m kind of wishing I could introduce you to The Bestest Boyfriend, who was capable of taking care of himself and others, as well as having a pet boa and an iguana, and whose natural hours were compatible with yours (not terribly good at listening, but that seriously was his worst defect; how good are you at writing important stuff on brightly colored felt-tip pens and shoving it under someone’s nose?). Are your rodents pets, or are they the snakes’ food? Rodents pets plus snake pets seems like an unusual combo, but I guess so long as they’re neither conscious of the other…
You don’t need to settle down when the DOWN is a lot bigger than the settle. There are guys out there who are a good match for you. I do hope and believe that you can find one.
The current BF sounds like a bad deal - sounds like you’re taking care of him, but who is taking care of you?
I’ve had a couple offers for BF since my husband died, but I’ve spent a lot of my life taking care of other people, if I can’t have someone who will take care of ME at least half the time I’d rather be alone. I don’t regret the time I spent caring for loved ones, but I’m tired, mentally and emotionally exhausted. The thing I need is a man-child or fixer-upper.
You know I found out long ago to make meals on my terms. I’m open to suggestion about favorites and special meals. The fact is I’ve cooked many game meats for Mr.Wrekker that I wouldn’t eat if I was starving. But, the time the meal is served is my decision. No one is gonna tell me what to serve, when to serve or how to serve. Like I said, ask me nicely and I do about anything for you. But don’t you dare take me for granted in the kitchen. That’s when I go on strike. I’m not your personal chef or kitchen maid.
The people in your house that are eating what you prepare will adjust their timing if they get hungry enough. I promise. You cook it, they will come. Food is a great motivator.
ETA, now doing dishes is where I fall short. I’ve never been able to get anyone in my house to do it. Believe me I’ve tried.
Today’s an odd-numbered day. Wouldn’t the golf story be about the idiot-in-chief?
For what it’s worth, I’ve always had a huge Doper crush on you.
I found out today that I’ve been single for the last 2 weeks or so. Girl I was dating had withdrawn some. She’s a widow, and we’re approaching the anniversary of her husband’s death. I understood. She asked for space and time, so I gave it to her. We’d talk on the phone or text off and on. Part of our problem was that we’d known each other for over 20 years, so moving from friends to lovers was naturally awkward. I was at the wedding to her now-deceased husband (at? I performed it).
Anyway, so I texted her just to check on her, as it had been a few days. And found out that she’s moved on from a relationship that I didn’t even know had ended.
This school year, a stairway collapsed at the high school (no injuries, thankfully). The structural failure has been decades in the making, years of poor maintenance procedures and inadequate inspections. Of course, people blame the Superintendent and Principal who have been in their respective positions a combined 3 years.
This kicked off a year long set of inspections (at every school) , hallway closings at the HS, rented classroom trailers, modified calendar, the works. The year for the high schoolers has been pretty disrupted. And now, the administration is releasing the repair schedule, including asbestos removal the last month of the school year (even more disruption) and a full summer of rebuilds, scheduled to be completed a week before school opens in the fall.
My rant isn’t for the administration, it’s for the complaining parents.
- The people you want fired were literally not here, and not in charge of any of this stuff when the damage was done.
- You have about 10% of the information they do regarding what went wrong, what needs to be done, and what is possible in regards to doing it.
- They considered the “fix it over the summer” option, AND the “start the project over the summer” option. Seriously, they’re not morons.
This last one is a bit specific. In our town the school board is appointed by the Mayor, not separately elected.
- There is no cabal of school board members jealously guarding their cushy jobs. Until the last election 3 years ago, no Mayor had successfully been re-elected since at least 1980. To put in simpler terms, the person appointing the school board has changed every 4 years since forever. We have actually “voted the bums out” over and over and over again, and this particular situation still happened.
I know folks in my town LOVE complaining, but get a grip.
I have to admit that I was not aware of this particular policy anywhere in this country. But when I did a Google search, I found that there was evidence of existing or attempted mayoral control was found in about 20 major districts around the United States. These include school boards in both Chicago and New York City.
So, Cheeseteak, let me ask you: In your opinion, does this work in your town? Who gets appointed to the school board? Are they mayoral cronies, or those who speak up regarding school policy matters? Or both? Do people ask to be appointed?
Thanks in advance for any opinions you’d care to share.
As far as I can tell, board members are generally professionals who have some link to education in their background. There are a few lawyers, people who have run schools or worked for schools at some point, maybe they were just active in the district as a parent. There was a kerfluffle recently because one member was subsequently elected to a high position in the teacher’s union.
I can’t say I’m aware of cronyism, and the revolving door mayorship over the last 40 years suggests that cronyism wouldn’t last particularly long anyway.
There has been dysfunction on the board, with members being snippy and disrespectful to other members, but I imagine that can happen on any board.
Does it work? I think the board members take the job seriously, and they are qualified to understand and deal with educational matters. They may not always make the right decisions, but I don’t think it’s a problem with the system, elected boards screw up too. I do like the fact that they’re not making decisions with a goal of securing re-election.
Edited to add, such as with this stairway problem, the board hasn’t been publicly acting outraged on our behalf to make us feel more sympathetic towards them. They’re just working with the administration to get it dealt with.
Thank you for your reply. Your insight suggests that this system does indeed work. Most school board members that I know try to do the best job possible, but, as you point out, there is always the goal of re-election.
Whelp, there goes 13th century carpentry. And they’ll probably replace it with some fucky glass-and-plastic high-tech looking bullshit, too. Thanks, 2019 ! Here I thought you were going to be my rebound for the awfulness that was 2018, and 2016 before that, but golly gee, you found it in you to dredge the pits of shit for something new and exciting. I’m sorry I doubted you.
And they said my alcoholism was a growing problem ! Shows how much they know.
Y’all are sweet. No lie, my ego lapped all that up. Thank you.
Bad ego!
I started a thread in MPSIMS and can’t quite link, because either Tapatalk and phone, or because I’m dumb. Have at it over there, I don’t want to hijack the monthly mini rant.
Apparently, the mail person was totally flummoxed by the arcane and complicated workings of the not-locked gate, and so could not deliver my package. I am so chastened that I did not leave it open for him. Such sky high expectations on my part.
one of the few non-human new flashes that had me in tears [i consider 9/11 to be about the people not the buildings] I can’t believe I will never see Notre Dame again in this lifetime.
OK, I know this isn’t the library but rather a(n indoor) public space. Still, for fuck’s sake, don’t use your phone as a goddamn speaker phone with the volume on the highest possible volume. And don’t carry on that conversation at length because I am childish and I will retaliate in kind.
And I’m the one who has a battery powered speaker large enough for classrooms of kindergarten kids. Large enough that I can no longer hear you or your conversation.
Although turning around and asking me to be quiet because you were on a call was ironic. A pity Guns N’ Roses was too loud for me to hear your request.