No need. Just have the farmer next door make his cows wear snowshoes.
After they got it out of the pool it walked away under its own power.
The farmers fixed the fence today, and fixed the turf they’d destroyed. My wife says they asked where I bought the cover so they could replace it.
Shows what you know. This thread is actually a political allegory.
The elephant represents the Republicans and the elephant proof cover represents the NSA spying program which has been made impenetrable. The water in the pool represents our freedoms. The Democrats blunder in (as represented by the cow) and tear up the program and shit on our freeedoms.
Or, you could read it as a Democrat and say that the Elephant represents the Republicans and the cover is the NSA program. It’s “elephant proof” just like Bush designs a program to protect us from something that’s a hyperbolous danger (elephants falling in the pool in PA.) Of course the cover is permeable to the real dangers of Republican incompetance and self-interest (as represented by the cow) which tears through the worthless and expensive cover and shits on our freedoms.
Or else the cow is Osama Bin Laden, and the shit is WMDs and the cover is Iraq. In that case the farmer is John Kerry and…
Are you buying any of this?
Thank you for the compliment.
Between this and The Horror of Blimps, I laughed so hard I literally could not breathe. I had to force myself to step away from the computer. I’ve only just now recovered.
**Scylla **…I love you.
So you’re saying I wouldn’t be a genius in India.
How about Africa? Wildebeest would still break through, wouldn’t they?
Band name!
Scylla, you always bring joy and laughter (I say that as one who stays out of political threads, of course).
As we all know: in India, cows are sacred, and so can walk on water. Problem solved.
I saw elephants painting pictures once. Not just random globs of paint, but PICTURES. It was amazing.
This probably doesn’t help much.
Sorry 'bout your pool/yard/fence/etc.
Send some groundhogs after the cow for revenge (you are NEVER going to be forgotten for that thread). It’s only just. Ich bin ein cow, and all that.
Are they going to make the cow pay for this shit?
Is she going to be walking down the road all day long picking up aluminium cans?
Oh my! I’m sorry you had to go through all of this, but the story is absolutely friggin’ hilarious! I read the story aloud to my husband and he was laughing hysterically too.
You know, your story about the blimp is what brought me to these boards. Thanks so much for yet another entertaining story.
I’m glad the farmer fixed/paid for the damages. That must make it just a little more easier to bear. Did you ever get your tennis game in?
Exactly.
No, you’ve messed it all up!
The cover manufacturer is the Republican controlled government, selling you, poor gullible guy, this so-called protection (the cover) that may very well work for a non-existent or exceedingly unlikely catastrophe (elephants stampeding across your pool and fallilng in). The real and far more likely problem of a cow taking a stroll across your pool is ignored (all the real foreign and domestic problems the country is experiencing): you suffer, the farmer suffers, the cow suffers, and the cover manufacturer in the meantime gets rich and snickers at you, while you continue on and on about how they’re wonderful and there was certainly no better way to approach the situation. And you continue to believe in their promises because, look! they gave you a $5 rebate on your purchase (the tax reduction).
Now do you understand? 
I can relate to both sides of this. I have a pool and once worked for years on a Angus cattle farm. Cows are dumb. I hate and loathe pigs but at least they have a few active brain cells.
A perq of the job and part of my pay was all the free hamburger I could eat 
Once a year I got to pick a steer and write my name on the side. (It was a lipstick like crayon marker.) I even got to load it on the trailer and deliver it to the meat guy. A few days later I’d pick up a couple of boxes of steaks, roasts and ground beef. Whatever combanation I wanted.
Wow.
If you could just to that with Conservatives…
Not much sulphur and brimstone in this one, so I’ll quickly kick it over to MPSIMS so that the Pit mods won’t know it’s gone. Not for hours, at least. (Or days. Or weeks. Or, you know, ever.)
Could someone pleease link to the The Horror of Blimps story? After this one, I have to read it.
Thanks
Here you go.
You’re not drinking anything, I hope?
Check out post 22, I think there is a link in that post.
What a great story!
But what busts my brains is that they sell elephant proof covers in the States. Do you have a lot of problems with elephants in pools over there? :dubious:
Well, of course they do. Don’t you know we’re the most obese nation in the world? 
Thank you, for both the link and the warning. That was… well… 
Most pool fencing regulations seem to require one 5 foot fence. Chaulk one up for bureaucratic regulation.