Elevator High Jinx

Me, 49 year old office drone going to the 4th floor of my building. As I get in the elevator, scruffy 20s guy, reeking of pot going to upper floor (there’s a mortgage something or other there). Guy reeks of pot, I’m guessing he’s a messenger or something, hits the wrong button, then hits his button. Then gets off when the elevator stops my floor, but has to rush to get back in the elevator because he’s going to the 11th floor.

Lord knows I was that guy most of my 20s, wake and bake kind of stumbling through the day, so I know what I have to do. Just as the doors are closing I look in the elevator and say, “everyone knows your high.”

I bet he’s still trying to get someone to believe him that it really happened to him today.

His high what? Poodle?

One reason I can’t get on board with the legalization of marijuana is that I can’t stand the smell of it, and I hate the contact high I get from being in a stoner’s presence.

Damn, your/you’re typo. Still when spoken, it doesn’t matter. As a former pothead, the best thing about legalization is messing with potheads. Although this happened in Maryland, not DC so still illegal.

I just remember how paranoid I’d get when high (it’s one of the reasons I stopped) and I get a chuckle out of the idea of someone saying that to me.

“Of course I’m high, man, we’re on the 11th floor.”

Wait, what?

That’s… not a thing that can happen.

If some lady smoked a whole lot and then you motor boated her I could see it happening.

I’ll take weed reek over tobacco reek every time.

And I would totally say that to the dude, too. Laughing all the way. Messing with potheads is fun.

There is a possibility that I’m bored in my work.

Huh, weird. I say the words “you’re” and “your” differently. Must be a regionalism.

You’re = rhymes with “fewer”
Your = rhymes with “pour”

Oh, and just to stay on topic, I have my own MPSIMS about elevator hijinks.

It was the late 90’s, middle of the winter. A friend and I had gone downtown to see a late night movie, and parked in a parkade (high-rise parking lot) with an elevator. After the movie let out around 1:30am we were riding the parkade elevator down to our car. In the course of being hyperactive teens, we noticed that the elevator had a bit of a bounce to it if you jumped or shifted your weight. Well, game on, mommafarker! We were jumping up and down in unison and getting that elevator to really bounce and fly around the shaft as it descended. Riiight up until the point where we bounced so hard that we tripped the safety mechanism that prevents a falling car in the case of broken cables. Didn’t actually break the cables, just tripped the safety mechanism.

Let me tell you, it is difficult to get the elevator company to jump to respond when they know that this is completely your teenaged dumbass fault. Unfortunately the elevator was in an unheated parkade, we were dressed very lightly, and it was the middle of the winter in Edmonton, Alberta. Were we ever glad to see the elevator tech when he showed up about 2 hours later.


Not that you are going to do that again but a stuck elevator is considered an emergency and a call to the fire department will get a rescue squad out there pronto to get you out.

One of the most common fire calls you hear in most cities.

Dude, when motor boating you’re not supposed to go all the way into the lungs! It’s strictly a surface activity.

If true, it could’ve saved me a lot of money.