Elian G. is a deep-cover spy planted by Castro

He was to grow up the US with hypnotic commands planted deep in his subconscious that would cause him to report intelligence back to Castro.

It’s a win-win situation for Castro. If the US decides to obey it’s own immigration laws and send him back, Castro wins a political battle. If he stays, then a potentially useful spy is accepted in the US.

Send the little commie back to uncle Fidel! In chains!

OK, seriously, this actually isn’t a bad idea. Substitute the hypnosis for something a little more plausible, like a simple brainwashing, and it might work.

I think Miami could use a little more culture…let the kid stay