If I were approached by a boss to kick down for such a lunch I would sweetly decline to attend. Hey, everybody gone for a while? Sweet, nice and quiet and I can read undisturbed. If attendance is mandatory then no way would I pay for the privilege, they can either figure out the budget or we’re going to have some words with the Labor Board about shit like this.
That might have been an option but at that workplace it would have meant being ostracized for a long time by some of my coworkers for being an a*****e.
Exactly, some work activities may not be part of the job but are as close to mandatory as can be.
There was an epic thread on here years ago about corporate United Way giving and how it wasn’t really optional in many workplaces. In some, you’d be better off taking a dump on the boss’s desk than not donating to United Way.
My employer sponsors and pays for an Employee Barbecue each year. I always refuse to attend, on the grounds that you eat pork at a pork barbecue, beef at a beef barbecue…
I would decline, on the basis that in my idiolect, “barbecue” refers to a method of preparing food or the food resulting from that method of preparation. It is neither an event (that’s a “cookout” or “picnic”), nor a cooking appliance/device (that’s a “grill” or smoker or something else). And sometimes I like being an asshole about that distinction.
And I don’t like eating in a grassy area.
And I don’t like attending work events during non-work hours.
All the tech companies I worked for had a budget for this kind of event, which depended on the financial situation. It ranged from a fancy dinner including spouses/partners during the bubble to bowling other times. We also had all hands where awards were handed out with no or minimal food.
I took a government contracting class which taught me what you can’t do as an outsider for government employees, but is the restriction on the agency paying for small events a law or is just the department being cheap?
Yeah, we paid for gifts and refreshments for birthdays, retirements, weddings and new babies ourselves.
As a taxpayer, if I’m helping to fund the operation of a government agency, and part of that operation includes picking up lunch for the rank-and-file every few weeks or so - I’m perfectly OK with that.
Long pig doesn’t count as pork?
I mostly ran into these sorts of enforced jocularity sessions working in call centers, and trust me, being ostracized as an asshole by a goodly percentage of your coworkers is a huge advantage in those work places. 
Oh, it can be an advantage anywhere… one ad agency I worked at was so filled with gossip, that I popped my head into my boss’s office, said “Hey, everyone’s complaining about everyone else behind their backs. Do you mind if I just ignore all that, keep my head down and do my work?”
He chuckled, said “Glad one person’ll be doing that. Great, I won’t bother you with the crap I hear… now, go get that head down!”
I think it frustrated the really toxic folk that I didn’t play (or even notice) their little games. But my blood pressure went down, and I got a lot more done.
It’s a judgement call. I’m also concerned about a scenario like, “hey, Kropotkin, this burger’s pretty good. Kropotkin? Hey, has anyone seen Kropotkin? He was here a minute ago, talking to the cook!”
My workplace has an Employee Association that puts on an luncheon events every month for employees. Employees who pay dues ($25) can participate in all the events. Those who don’t pay dues can pay $5 just for a single event.
It’s actually a great deal for the amount food you get. You also aren’t just getting food. You’re supposed to also get comaraderie and that kind of thing.
In your case, I think I’d want to know what I was getting for $5. If it’s steak and lobster, then it’s a great deal. If it’s bologna and cheese sandwiches, then you’re being ripped off. I suspect it’s not going to be either of these extremes but somewhere in the middle. Your $5 will likely be matched by your employer or boss so that you can have a slightly nicer lunch than what you’d normally have.
Old joke from about 3rd grade:
There’s a prison where the warden is known for being really tough on the inmates. The food isn’t very good. The TV doesn’t work. There isn’t much exercise equipment. Etc. But the real hallmark of his meanness is that he won’t let the inmates change their underwear. One day a big cheer goes up because he announces that he’s changing that policy. But one inmate senses something’s up. “What’s the catch?” The warden replies, “Dave, you change with Tony; Bob, you change with Fred…”
Everybody pays for employee appreciation? “Dave, you appreciate Tony; Bob, you appreciate Fred…”
Yep, time to volunteer for that committee.
The last few years, our “Holiday Dinner” (Christmas but wait, what if we’re not all Christians?) has been free. Unless you bring your spouse. Then you have to pay $20 for the spouse. We went and it wasn’t great. We concluded it probably costs $10 per person, and who isn’t going to bring the spouse? So there’s nothing free there at all.
In this case it was hamburgers, hot dogs, and potato chips.
I think the operative term is “Employee Appreciation”. That implies that the company/boss is doing something for YOU the employees, in order to show that they appreciate you. This also implies that they’re going to foot the bill.
Charging you for your own Employee Appreciation Lunch is very tone deaf. It’s like taking someone out for their birthday and then expecting to split the check. In essence, they’re saying “We appreciate you, but not enough to actually pay for your lunch.” Which is worse in my opinion, than not doing it in the first place.
Now if it was one of those Employee Morale Committee type things, where they put on various events through the year, and collect cash to put them on, that’s something different. All the company’s doing in that case is letting everyone take their nose away from the grindstone long enough to put the thing on, or attend the thing. I’ve always enjoyed those kinds of events.
This is almost exactly my experience. There are a very few occasions when the government foots a small bill (I think) because there is a work related purpose. But there are other occasions where bosses provide treats for staff, or if it’s a holiday party it’s potluck, or if retirement then there might be a collection taken up but not organized directly by bosses. There would never be “employee appreciation” that the employees had to pay for.
In the Navy, aboard ship, it’s very simple. Everyone is expected to pay “wardroom dues” each month, which can then go to miscellaneous expenses like that described in the OP, or else…
My boss once paid* for an employee appreciation lunch, on employee appreciation day, and told us attendance was mandatory. It ended up being a long lunchtime meeting with several lectures on things we weren’t doing well and new things we were going to have to do. I thought that was bad. I also think this is bad. Why is it so hard for so many in management to be decent human beings?
*I’m not sure if he paid out of pocket or was able to expense it. It wasn’t anything fancy, just a party platter from Chipotle we ate in the conference room while being “appreciated” for our screw-ups.
I wish more people would have that attitude. Currently, the federal government isn’t allowed to even provide free coffee or tea to government employees. Nevermind the fact that that expense would be far outpaced by a return in productivity.
I hate employee appreciation lunches, and I would hate it even more if I had to pay for it. One of the best things about the coronavirus is that we didn’t have an employee appreciation lunch this year. Last year some genius decided to have it outside in a park. In the middle of summer, in North Carolina. Not gonna happen, my dude. It’s bad enough when it’s in an air-conditioned building.
My worst employee appreciation story was the time the food monitors wouldn’t let me have any veggie lasagna. They said I needed a ticket, but there was nothing in any of the many emails that were sent that even hinted that we would need tickets to get the lasagna. That was years ago and I’m still annoyed.