Encounters with wildlife while driving this weekend

I’m happy to say none of the following resulted in any fatalities.

I had four encounters with animals in the road while I was out driving this weekend.

In reverse order, I was driving home from a nearby town tonight and I saw a cat sitting in the road. It was sitting in the left land and I was driving in the right so no problem.

The squirrel I encountered this afternoon while driving to that town was more of a problem. He seemed panicked and every time I swerved one way to avoid him, he reversed direction and ran back into my path. Fortunately I was driving slowly and nobody was behind me so I was able to come to a complete stop and just wait until he finally chose a direction and ran off the road.

The two dogs I encountered Sunday were less co-operative. They had apparently decided the road was part of their territory and were out in the middle of it, barking at me to back off. I was not going to turn around but every time I tried to steer around them, they ran out in front of my car and just barked louder. I tried honking my horn at them but that didn’t chase them away. I was finally able to steer far enough to the side of the road to get by them.

The saddest encounter was the duck I saw Saturday. She was just sitting in the middle of the expressway, letting high speed traffic go by on each side of her. I feel she must have decided to lay an egg in a pothole and now she wouldn’t leave it. She was okay when I saw her but I do not foresee a happy outcome to that one.

Mundane? Pointless? Miscellaneous? Personal? Check, check, check, and check.

I try to help the turtles, I really do, but you just want to smack the ones that — after I’ve picked them up and set them on the side of the road — TURN TAIL AND HEAD BACK ACROSS THE STREET!

Sorry, sometimes Nature be stoopid.

I’m not sure cats and dogs count as wildlife.

Note for the turtle-curious: if you want to help that turtle across the road, when you pick it up, make sure you are face-to-face, because there is about to be a gusher of piss out the other end.

Excellent advice, but beware of turtle face getting too close to precious parts of your anatomy.