English Showers (Bathroom not April)

The BBQ Pit
21

From what I know, English plumbing is so bad because:

  • Water pressure is much lower than in North America or the rest of Europe. The supply line from the water main to a house is also smaller in diameter in the UK.

  • Hot water tanks are small (20 to 30 gallons/80 to 120 liters in the UK, versus 40 or 50 gallons/160 or 200 liters in the US)

  • The goofy cistern system, where an open tank of water is kept in the attic, supposedly to provide an emergency water supply in case the French decide to attack and shut off municipal water supplies.

North American residential plumbing looks something like this:

  1. Municipal water supply
  2. Backflow prevention valve
    3a) Some water is piped to the hot water tank, then to all faucets/taps
    3b) Some water is piped directly to all faucets/taps
  3. Hot water and cold water emerge from the faucets/taps under the same pressure.

British plumbing, AFAIK, runs something like this:

  1. Municipal water supply
    2a) Some water is piped to the attic cistern, which is usually open to the air, and then to hot water tanks. I think cistern water supplies toilets, too.
    2b) Some water is piped to cold water taps.
    3a) Hot water emerges from the hot tap at the pressure provided by gravity from the cistern.
    3b) Cold water emerges from the cold tap at the pressure provided by the municipal water system.

The taps are kept separate, because there’s no backflow prevention valve. Potentially contanimated hot water could mix with cold water, and thus find its way back into the municipal water supply.

22

I’ve always known it as an “Irish shower.”

23

Hmm, I’ve always heard it as a “whore’s bath.”

See, no nationalistic hard feelings.

24

Haven’t done anything in Britain besides change planes, but I’ve had interesting experiences with the plumbing in Italy and the Netherlands. Does anyone on the European continent grasp the concept of a ‘shower’?

You know how the shower head normally sticks out of one end of the tub, aiming down the length of the tub? At our room in an reasonably inexpensive, but otherwise extremely nice, hotel in Margraten (Netherlands), the shower fixture over the tub protruded from the middle of the wall above one side of the tub, aiming across the tub. And no shower curtain to help keep the water in.

In the two places we stayed in Italy, the shower head was back in its usual place, but again, no shower curtains. (WTF is this - do Europeans not grasp the concept of a $2 piece of vinyl keeping water in the tub and off the floor while taking a shower?)

The bathroom in our room at the very expensive hotel in Venice had some sort of plexiglass divider on top of the side of the tub in lieu of a shower curtain, but it only extended ~2 feet from the end of the tub, and didn’t form a good seal with the top of the tub side; water hit the divider, ran down it to the top of the tub side, then ran out between the plexiglass and the tub to wind up on the floor.

And our room in the villa in Tuscany (presumably expensive as well, but someone else was picking up this tab, thank goodness) had a stepped mini-tub sized for a 6 year old, for lack of a better description. At the end with the fixtures and the drain, there was a flat area around the drain not quite big enough for me to put both feet in and stand securely. Then moving away from the drain end, it stepped up about 15 inches to a step big enough for a 6 year old to sit on.

My best guess is that such a 6 year old could have taken a seated shower in this tub, by sitting on the step (which was below the level of the side of the tub) and putting his feet in the area around the drain. But it was unusable by adults: I’m fairly agile even in awkward places, but I was a little bit afraid, each time I used the shower in this tub, that I’d lose my footing (since I’d have one foot by the drain, and one foot on the step) and fall and crack my skull on the sink. My wife, a Rubenesque beauty who has two bad knees and one bad ankle, had a far worse time of it than I did. And no, the damned thing didn’t have a shower curtain either.

25

When we visited Itreland, the shower facilities varied widely from simple operation to things that looked like lab experiments. In one B&B we encountered this boxy monstrosity on the wall that had three knobs for controlling the shower, not one of which did anything simple and understandable. Apparently the hot water and cold water systems were from different supplies at different pressures (as elmwood describes, although I’m not sure it’s for those reasons). It was not possible to hit upon the magic combination of knobs tyhat provided a decent flow of water at a decent temperature.

26

Around here it’s called “The Spanish Art”.

27

Is today Monday? I guess I must be in Newcastle upon Tyne then.

Hotel Shower Report

Water volume: excellent.
Adequate heat: definitely.
Temperature adjusting controls: excellent

[so far, so good]

Sprayhead pattern: the name of the make is “Anystream”. A better name would be “Anystream-you-want-as-long-as-it-resembles-a-firehose”. Turn the water on too hard and it would punch a hole right through you, and probably the shower wall as well.

Temperature consistency: fine most of the time but if (I assume) your neighbour turns on his/her shower, it goes to scald mode.

And we were doing so well…

And by the way a Swedish guy once described it as a “Swedish shower”. So self-depracating, those Swedes.

28

Man. Who knew such diverse ugliness could be packed into one simple spongebath?

29

I never had a problem with the showers in UK or France. I cannot remember the ones in Germany or Austria–too long ago, but must have been ok, since I have no scars or funny stories.

Sorry to hear about your troubles. Think I’ll mull them over in a nice hot soak…