While I largely agree with the OP, there must be a Chris Moore exemption clause, for his farcical novels Bloodsucking Fiends and You Suck: A Love Story.
The only thing disappointing about Angel was that the WB didn’t order a 6th season. If anything, it was a rare spinoff that was better than its parent show.
Can’t speak for Zombie Honeymoon, but Diary of the Dead wasn’t direct to DVD. Granted, it was a “blink and you’ll miss it” theatrical release, but it was in theaters. And of course it should count, it’s a fucking Romero movie.
But it blows. It makes Day of the Dead look like a fucking masterpiece and Day of the Dead should never be considered a masterpiece of anything! It sucks.
Jim Butcher’s vampires and evil and cool. And they come in three delicious flavors:
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Black: Just evil bastards who can juggle tanks and kill people. They have all the well-known weaknesses.
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Red: The bloodsuckers who addict people to their venom.
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White: Feed on emotions like lust, fear and despair.
Not a sparklepire among them, all very freaky.
There’s also the Jade, but they are mysterious.
Weeee-eeee-eeell, Thomas and the White Court are sort of sparklepires. They’re very pretty people. Unlike Meyer’s vampires, though, the pretty is a very thin layer hiding the nasty, and few of them have anything like morals. Thomas is a cliche emo sparklepire, though, right up there with Angel and Edward. He’s just written better, so he’s less lame.
Hear, hear!
I have to put in a good word for Octavia Butler’s Fledgling, too. It’s not your usual vampire story. The main vampire character is mostly portrayed positively, but she does some really nasty stuff (with a good reason) in at least one instance. It’s been a while since I read the book. At any rate, the vampires in this book are not undead, though they do drink blood and they are mostly unable to tolerate sunlight. My main complaint is that I think that Butler intended to write at least one more book in this setting, and she died before she did so. In fact, that’s my main complaint about Butler. She died before she had written all of her stories. So sad.
I’m willing to settle for bulettes. Or medusae.
I really liked Fledgling, and Sunshine, and Fevre Dream. I would recommend the vampire books by Tanya Huff, Charlie Huston and P.N. Elrod.
The urban fantasy craze has led Patricia Briggs to move into this genre, and I like her new series, particularly the first two books.
Another vote for Charlie Huston. I see his “Joe Pitt Casebooks” as vampire books for people that don’t like vampires.
No kissing away bloody tears for Huston and Joe Pitt. More like blasting the heads off of them with a .45.
One of my best friends spotted it in a box at an (unfortunately now out-of business) independent record store. He was going to move on, but I suggested we split the cost two ways. Best $7.50 I ever spent. At the time we were roommates, but we now have joint custody–it spent a few years with him, then moved in with me.
You think it was consistently better than Buffy? I haven’t seen all of Angel, so I’m not as familiar with it as with Buffy, and certainly there were some parts of *Angel *that were better than some parts of Buffy, but I don’t think it’s fair to say that as a whole, *Angel *was better than Buffy. IMO, *Buffy *at its best is much better than *Angel *at its best.
David Boreanez is kind of a shitty actor, but Angel wasn’t really a cliche emo sparklepire. There are lots of downsides to his being a vampire (sunlight = explodes into flames, death from stake through the heart or beheading, can’t touch holy water or crosses, constant psychic torment from the knowledge of all the people he killed, and will go back to being an evil mofo anytime he’s happy enough to forget everything he did).
As long as there are females there will be vampire shit.
[sub]I’m sorry…[/sub]
This is the only entry in the vamp-media genre I’ve ever actually been enthused about. Perhaps it’s because while vampires are an important part of the plot, they’re not the sole focus. (In some ways the werewolf character is more pivotal to the character development).
Love the bit where, when the vampire gets staked by another vampire, they actually call 911 (or the British equivalent) and have the paramedics take him to the hospital…where the ER staff are totally flummoxed that the heart monitor won’t work.
I dunno, I liked Diary. It was no Dawn, but it was alright, certainly better than Land. Of course, Day’s grown on me over the years, too. It’s the weakest of the original trilogy, sure, but it hardly sucks either.
Buffy at its best was better than Angel, I’ll admit, but Buffy wasn’t always at its best. Buffy’s highs were high, but the lows were low. Angel was more consistent, so the averages work out to Angel’s benefit. IMO, anyway. But if you disagree, I’ll bite you. 
The only vampire who I’ll ever be enthused isn’t actually a human. And no, I don’t mean as in he’s a monster. He was never human. And he was never sexy. Well…maybe to some. But he was awesome. He ruled literature. For a time.
Say it with me now.
Bunnicula!
Bunnicula!
“Today vegetables, tomorrow the world.”
-Chester the cat
Ick, really? I hated Diary. IMO, it was pretty much as if actual film students had made the damn thing. Except not **real **film students, because I’ve seen films made by film students, and most of those have better dialogue, acting, characters, and plot. So, like, **wannabe **film students.
Also, anybody who’s not a moron knows that you couldn’t possibly pierce a human skull WITH A FUCKING RECURVE BOW WHAT THE HELL.
That costs extra.
God, I loved those books so much. Thanks for reminding me!
Bunnicula was the original “vegetarian vampire”.
Anyone who hasn’t seen this movie needs to see it. If you don’t like it, you deserved to be punished by sitting through it; and if you do like it, you deserve its tasty rewards.
Hell no.