Video I don’t know about, but I do know that there are places that do photo slideshows. These seem to work well, especially if you have some good silly photos. Not sure if I’d want to see a video of you talking to me though.
Quasi, you are permitted an honor guard, if you were honorably discharged.
The whole nine yards: pallbearers, riflemen, bugler…
We had that for Daddy. With all the base cutbacks and whatnot, you may be given a song and dance about “not having the people available.” Hubster DEMANDED it for Daddy, since he put in his twenty.
And even with a cremation, you still get the honor guard pallbearers! They do a beautiful job of UNFOLDING the flag (it’s on display next to the box or urn), and then folding it up again. They did it slowly, respectfully, and it was almost like a graceful dance.
After the riflemen fired, Hubster went out to collect the shells and put them inside the folded flag.
And we had an honest-to-God BUGLER. The honor guard and riflemen were AF, and they had to go all the way to Ft Huachuca to find a bugler–he was Army!
Hubster was NOT going to tolerate a tape recorder playing “Taps” perched on the tailgate of somebody’s truck.
Whoever does the contacting will have to really push…and the services may have to be scheduled around the availabilty of the team. But it’s a wonderful honor and recognition for service to your country.
~VOW
Also, Quasi:
If you are near a National Cemetery, burial is completely FREE, whether traditional or inurned “cremains.”
Alas, all the stuff to get you READY for burial is on your dime.
~VOW
We’re not open casket people either, so when we rented the casket for the wake, we were told it would either be empty, or have the ashes in it. I wouldn’t be the body because in cases of cremation, they don’t do any kind of embalming work. In which case, the body would be kinda grody.
The reason we rented the casket was because it just looked odd - an urn on a table in the front where the casket usually goes looked plain and small, somehow. Not what we wanted for dad. 
I don’t know about a video, but our funeral home did a wonderful DVD of pictures that played during the wake. It was not only extremely moving, it was in the rear of the room along with some chairs, which made for a wonderful place for everyone to talk and remember and laugh.
The video would be for my wife, son, and grandkids only, Sateryn, and I haven’t heard the word “grody” in ages! 
But yeah, that makes sense, being laid out and stinkin’ up the place. Be a great joke though. Put a fan near the casket and let me waft, boys! 
Q
I have heard of people who want a viewing with the actual body for someone being cremated. The funeral home MAY require embalming for that situation. I’ve also heard of people not having a rented casket for said viewing. The departed is stretched out on a table, with draping covering most of the body. The one I saw pictures of was for a Harley aficionado, and there were Harley themed drapings.
Not my cuppa tea, but for some people, being able to SEE the deceased helps them with closure.
Momma’s memorial was at the funeral home. She wasn’t “back from cremation” yet, so we didn’t have “her” parked in front of everyone. The niche where the casket is typically placed was filled with the flowers people had sent, and we had a big picture of my parents on an easel.
And we even brought her sewing machine to place in the front. For anyone who knew my mother, it would have been seen as extremely appropriate.
There are no hard, fast rules. You are limited by propriety and any restrictions the funeral home might have.
But for some people, propriety is inappropriate!
~VOW
You need to check with your local funeral homes. Some of them will have pre-paid options, which are often less expensive. And a lot of the costs are entirely optional.
We paid $790 for Mom’s cremation a couple of years ago. No casket, no viewing, no embalming, no service at the funeral home, etc. Just transport and cremation plus a few copies of the death certificate; the ashes were returned in a cardboard box. (The SpousalUnit’s ashes came in a sturdy plastic box, but that was a different funeral home and over a decade ago. I don’t remember the costs for it - I only know Mom’s because I just had that paperwork out.)
Both memorial services were done by family and friends. One in a very nice rented venue, one at a local park with a rented tent. Obits and facilities were the largest costs.
We bought a nice wooden box for Mom’s ashes and had them on the memorial table with flowers, photos, etc.
Hmmmm. Ashes. That’s something I still need to decide. Half of them are going into the Tauber River and the other half ----- well, I’ve always joked that I wanted them mixed into some dip and served at my wake ----- but that IS just a joke okay? Maybe because I love the ocean, I’ll become a part of a reef or be whale food.
Q
And leave some for D so she’ll have something to yell at when she gets pissed about something!
And no, I’m not planning anything stupid. Yet. I need to stick around to see how this whole thing plays out.
Q
Bolding added.
This may not be an economical alternative, but since you brought up reefs, I have to link to Eternal Reefs. Warning. If you send away for flyers, or otherwise give them your address, they’ll start sending you Christmas cards.
I mostly find it amusing to be getting cards from a company that wants to cremate me and drop me in the ocean, but I can imagine that some people find it creepy.
I put Pam’s into little envelopes, one tablespoon each. Then I set out a big bowl of the envelopes at the celebration of life party, and asked people to take some with them if they were going somewhere exotic (or warm), as we didn’t get to travel as much as we wanted. I still get pictures when people take her places, from the Golden Gate Bridge to the beaches at Cancun.
I prepaid last year and it was just over $1000.00 but that is for a no frills cremation. Basically, they are supposed to pick up the body, throw it in a cardboard box and light the fire. No service, no memorial, no viewing the body, etc, etc.
I went with Veterans Cremation Service but that’s just a name; one doesn’t have to a veteran.
Not necessarily – you can display just the urn.
The vast majority of funeral directors are willing to work with a person on a budget, provided they’re reasonable, (in other words, don’t ask for the whole dog and pony show, but want it to be as cheap as possible)
My father-in-law died recently, and evidently you can get a cremation a lot cheaper by signing up as a member of a cremation society. Sorry I don’t have more specifics- maybe you can look online for one near you. My mother-in-law was able to sign them up on the spot and get the cremation done at the heavily-discounted (compared to the funeral director’s) price.
THAT is the sweetest thing I have read about, Fear! Thank you for that wonderful idea, my friend, and would it be okay to use/copy it?
Dopers: Not only a source of information, but also one of inspiration!
Thank you so much for that wonderful idea!
Bill
By all means. I was a little concerned that some people would be offended, but by the end of the night, all the envelopes were gone. They all loved it too.
… so please move it if need be, okay?
Many of you know I play World of Warcraft with my character (toon) “Wolkenlaufre”, right?
Well, I am hoping someone will play him for me after I can’t anymore, because it is the game which I enjoy so much and which is keeping me as sharp as I can at the present time.
I don’t want to burden anyone with this dumb Knight, but I have grown to love him and what he stands for: Chivalry, and that’s the way I “play” him.
I have to tell you that my “Li’l Sis” **SFG ** has already told me she would take over, but it is a very involved process with Blizz, and I don’t know how I can “give over” the rights to Wolkie and all his alts.
How can we manage this, friends?
Thanks
Quasi, Wolkie and Silka
ALL of the Silkas!
I had my mom cremated, with a nice wooden container for about 2k. (this level of simplicity was her request, btw; I think I’d like the same, myself, TBH).
Nice. The cheaper the better I’d like to go, Arky!
Thank you !
Quasi