A couple of years ago I was at a political event having worked as a volunteer. One of the candidates walked to up to me and said “I want to thank you for doing your part” or some such thing. Figuring that he was thanking me for the campaign volunteering, I thanked him and we continued talking a bit about the upcoming election.
Later he asked me when I got in. I said about 20 minutes ago. He seemed confused. “No, I mean when did you get back to the States”
Now I am confused since I had been in Italy on vacation about six months before but came back after a week.
Turns out there was a recently returned Iraq veteran and for some reason somone pointed at me. How in the hell anyone could have confused me for a soldier of any sort is beyond me. But he did spend 10 minutes kissing my ass for it.
It used to happen to me fairly regularly but hasn’t happened for a while. A few years ago I had 3 such incidents in a few weeks. I had a woman accost me and start chatting as we walked in the same direction one lunch time. We chatted away for several minutes until she asked a question I couldn’t answer and I explained that I wasn’t who she thought I was. She was horrified but I assured her that I had thoroughly enjoyed our chat.
A few days later I was outside work waiting for someone and a guy came up and started chatting like we were old friends. When I explained that I had never met him before he became quite annoyed, insisting that we had even played in a band together some years ago. Eventually I convinced him.
Perhaps a week later a woman stopped me when I was with my wife and started up a conversation that seemed to imply we used to hang out together a lot. I was able to convince both women of her error.
One day my co-worker comes in my office and starts talking about some situation. I am listening and trying to understand what he is talking about and afraid that I had forgotten some crucial information to a problem issue.
He continues to speak as my eyes glass over and I finally stop him, which for this guy is not an easy task, and I am like, What?
He then realizes he is talking to the wrong person. There was a lady of the same name as mine in the office, well hers was a shortened version of a longer name but she went by shortened one, and he had the wrong SomeUserName.
It was funny as this guy is never, NEVER wrong. He laughed it off with a “at least I thought of you first” and left the office.
I have received three messages from some guy named Rick, mostly incoherent. Yesterday Rick called again and began to chat me up and call me ‘‘baby.’’ He insists that I gave him my phone number at a nearby gas station. I told him I really don’t think that’s me, but he insisted. Finally I just told him I’m married, and I really don’t think I gave him my phone number at all. He was hurt and offended, but eventually hung up.
And this sort of qualifies.
My Mom had a boyfriend when I was 6 or 7 years old who I got very attached to. They eventually broke up but not before I totally worshipped the guy. I hadn’t seen him in years, and one day, as a teenager, I saw him standing at a local convenience store. My Mom saw him and encouraged me to go over and say hi. We sat there in her truck for like a full five minutes staring at the guy, me trying to get up the courage to say hi.
When he looked over and saw me, he gave me this knowing smile, and I finally got out of the truck and walked up to him. ‘‘Excuse me,’’ I said, ‘‘Are you Former Father Figure?’’
He got a sort of confused look on his face, and just said, ‘‘No.’’
Turns out he thought I was checking him out and thought I was going to go mack on him. Definitely a strange moment for me.