I’d like to be the evil genius. I really would, but I’m more of the hero type.
Sure, I get to beat the snot out of the evil genius in the end, but I get messed with and pounded on. I don’t even get to catch/kill/incapacitate/generally stop the villain at all. Curse my generally good nature!!
The noir detective who has a cynical line for every situation but in the end tries to do what’s basically right. (But frequently fails because the world’s a corrupt place.)
I’ve considered the evil genius route but frankly I don’t have the right stuff for evil genius, I keep wanting to help people, and not in the overarching benevolent dictator way, either. Drat.
I’m the evil genius who works part-time on the side of Good so they’ll never suspect a thing.
Never forget that Evil will always triumph because Good is dumb.