I know I would want to go out with dignity. Not afraid to die, but not looking forward to it if you know what I mean. I handled the news that I had an operable tumor well, but I had an uncle who died from cancer a few years before so I was fairly aware of the different possibilities and was able to rationally discuss with my doctor various options.
Hm, would it be possible to get something like a liquiprep kit to make sure that you were cleared out? And if you though you might have panic attacks, something like a minimal dose of something like valium?