I’ve known a lot since a very young age, actually. How young…well, pretty damn young. I wasn’t ever really restricted in what movies I watched, for instance. Didn’t matter if they were rated “R”, or not. Not to say that my parents didn’t care. They just didn’t seem to think that they needed to censor for me (I was a very smart kid).
I actually never had a “talk” of any kind. But, I knew what was what well before the Sex Ed class. Could have been the movies, could have been listening to/watching stand-up comics (I was maybe 4 when I saw Eddie Murphy’s Delirious, and was already a big fan of George Carlin), and it could have been stumbling onto my dad’s porno collection. 
My mom was pretty straightforward with me about the mechanics. Actually, she was one of the few moms in the neighborhood that would talk about such things. I remember my friend from next door would ask her lots of questions. With my son, I’ve never had “the talk”, I just answered questions as they have come up. His dad is also very approachable, maybe too much sometimes! But my son knows just about everything about everything, now.
We explained the basics to our daughter last year, when she was three. We might have waited a little longer, but my wife was pregnant and we wanted to be honest about it. There are books out there which help keep it at that age group’s level.
Sadly, having done that, it was all that much harder to explain the subsequent miscarriage.
I don’t remember ever actually sitting down and having “the talk” with my parents, but I do remember them answering my questions quite honestly. I also remember them getting a book for me, and allowing me to take all the sex-ed classes that were offered.
Now that I’m a parent, though, I’m not quite sure how to proceed. A question to the parents out there that have already discussed sex with your kids: In your opinion, which is better–sitting them down and having a talk with them, or not actually having “the talk,” but letting them know that you will answer any questions that they might have?
I firmly believe that when it comes to children and matters sexual, knowledge is power. The more they know about their own bodies, the easier it is for them to make the right choices. I’m just not quite sure how to go about getting her the information. She’s three now, so I’m sure that quite soon, the questioning will begin.
Persephone, I don’t know that waiting for questions from the kid is the answer… because they may wait to formulate the questions from information they get from their friends, and now you’re in competition with their peers as a data source. They’re going to have questions anyway, so you had might as well give them an informed basis for the subsequent questions while you still can. This is all, of course, IMHO.
I dunno. Talking about sex just came naturally. Like the “broken penis” episode. And when my son discovered his penis at age 2 and played with it whereever he went. I finally told him it was his penis to do with what he wished, but nobody wanted to see him do it.
And to all the people who don’t remember any talks with their parents: Yesterday me and the kids were talking about “talking about sex” (this thread had a lot to do with the conversation) and they both said that I and their father never explained the mechanics of the act.
I reminded them of the PBS special and the animated and prolonged conversations that show started. Both of my children said things to the effect of:
“Oh, yuck! I completely blocked that from my memory!”
and
“Didja have to remind me? No more mechanics from you, Mom!”
So you guys who don’t remember speaking on the subject with your parents, perhaps if you looked deeper into the things you’d rather forget. . .