Exploding Pork and Beans

[Cabin_Fever_1]

I found a can of half-eaten Van Camp’s Pork and Beans (“99% Fat Free!”) next to my side table.
I remember they sucked, but don’t remember me discarding them in such a haphazard manner.

They seem to be fermenting and rising up out of the can. They even appear to be glowing in the pre-dawn twilight. (5AM here).

If you all never hear from me again, assume something terrible has happened as I can’t find my HAZMAT suit, my cell phone is dead, and the beans are bubbling.
I hope my insurance is paid up.

[Mona_Lisa_Simpson]

I made pork and beans this weekend. They were not canned, they are in a bowl in my fridge. They are pretty damn yummy too.

Perhaps next time you should come over to my place instead of opening a nasty can?

[Backwater_Under_Duck]

When I was a child of a certain age range, I ate nothing but Pork and Beans. I guess I liked certain things (spaghetti), but my Mom would have to carry cans of Pork and Beans with her whenever we went places because, sometimes, it was the only thing that would do.

[Spud]

@Mona_Lisa_Simpson

I made pork and beans this weekend. They were not canned, they are in a bowl in my fridge. They are pretty damn yummy too.

Perhaps next time you should come over to my place instead of opening a nasty can?

There is nothing sexier than a woman who flirts using home made pork an beans as the incentive.

[Velocity]

@Cabin_Fever

I found a can of half-eaten Van Camp’s Pork and Beans (“99% Fat Free!”) next to my side table.
I remember they sucked, but don’t remember me discarding them in such a haphazard manner.

They seem to be fermenting and rising up out of the can. They even appear to be glowing in the pre-dawn twilight. (5AM here).

If you all never hear from me again, assume something terrible has happened as I can’t find my HAZMAT suit, my cell phone is dead, and the beans are bubbling.
I hope my insurance is paid up.

Sounds like a botulism hazard. Be careful.

[Thudlow_Boink]

@Backwater_Under_Duck

When I was a child of a certain age range, I ate nothing but Pork and Beans.

Wow, you took “So let’s have beans for every meal” seriously!

[running_coach]

@Velocity

Sounds like a botulism hazard. Be careful.

Botulism is anaerobic.

[Velocity]

@running_coach

Botulism is anaerobic.

Well, yes - if the can’s contents were already like this prior to being opened, then…

[Arrendajo]

I think you’re nuts to waste those beans. Just nuke 'em for a minute or two and they’ll be good as new.

[panache45]

In my experience, pork & beans explode AFTER you eat them.

[mind_the_gap]

If you go camping with Rick the Wreck he will sneak a can in the fire when you’re not looking. Scalding hot beans, lots of red coals flying around. Oh hell yes.

[Senegoid]

@Cabin_Fever

They seem to be fermenting and rising up out of the can. They even appear to be glowing in the pre-dawn twilight. (5AM here).

If you all never hear from me again, assume something terrible has happened as I can’t find my HAZMAT suit, my cell phone is dead, and the beans are bubbling.

Cover your mouth and nose with a wet cloth, and get thee over to a window and open it. Do whatever it takes to acquire a wet cloth before you even get out of bed – pee on the pillocase if that’s what it takes! Don’t light any matches.