At some point in my life, I started sticking “flow” onto the end of dirty words and I don’t know why.
So, even though they show up a little in a google engine, I still claim,
shitflow
crapflow
cuntflow and
titflow
as my own expletives.
My wife hates them. crap and shit I can say. Crapflow and shitflow she don’t like. I think they’re too visual, or childish.
I forgot to add “craptit” which still, REMARKABLY, showed up in one google hit but not in any way related to my usage.
I use “scraping pennies” when I’m broke. Today, I’m scraping pennies.
I think I originated “You’re going to hear about it” as a warning that a matter can’t and won’t be dropped. Even if I don’t give a damn about it, someone else will.
Never heard anyone say dickweed? You must have been homeschooled-- this term rivaled “gaywad” and “douchebag” on the 9th-grade-epithet hit parade in my school in the 80s. Could be a midwest regional thing, though.
Regional usages can be tricky; one person’s commonplace is another’s WTF. My old GF moved from Long Island to Seattle when she was a kid, and the first time someone told her to “scoot” or “scoot over,” she had no idea what the hell they were talking about.
I though of a couple more:
In re: Filing under H, I frequently offer to file things under “Forget,” as in we can forget it altogether.
Being a mildly high-strung person in a high-stress position, I frequently get “discombobulated.” If things get really bad, I get “discomBOOBulated,” and my male cow-orkers get to snigger. (And, oh, they do.)
My partner in crime at the office quite frequently refers to complicated tasks or situations as “kerfuffles.” She has an interesting take on the English language anyway, and I had always thought she’d made that one up.
My dad has flummoxed me with one recently, however. He referred to a couple of our acquaintance who are clearly hot for one another, as having to do the homagandy. If this word is in the dictionary, it is NOT spelled phonetically. Anyone?
I’ve just been informed in this thread that I should submit my expression:
Holy Crapioli
Yes, I use it all the time. No, I have no idea where it came from, or if it’s just something that sprouted out of my brain.
"The stars aligned to…", as in, "The stars aligned to produce a weekend without homework.
"On the morrow…" Nothing big, really.
"Hilarity ensued." Classic end to an anecdote inspired by the Fark dot com cliche.
There are many more, but I use them so commonly I scarcely notice! :eek:
Thanks.
OK, Horrific is an expression I use when something bad but relatively minor has happened (usually at school). “You mean we can’t get tickets for the field trip, Okay horrific.”
Going to smoke a cigarette at work has quite a few euphamisisms:going on a local field trip, excursion, gonna meditate, inservice meeting, and when I am annoyed and getting a cig: get in touch with my inner nihilist…er child, preventing school violence and washing the headmasters car.
Someone making excuses for lousy work is “Kinkadeing” after Thomas Kinkade.
Ron Kuby of ABC talk radio was talking about how some religious groups don’t allow women to speak in public. He said the belief is “You need two legs to walk and three legs to talk.”
I didn’t originate it, but I will be using it.
“Something smells jalinka” means something is not to pleasant smelling, in my family.
That came from an Aussie ad that played here in the 70’s. It turns out she was saying “some smells do linger” but it never sounded like that to my brother. He insisted she was telling us that things that smelt jalinka were bad. We still point out “jalinka” smells.
My brother could never say penguin, so they will always be pingwings to us.
Shit maybe my brother just had a problem 
I say “what’s-her-buckets.” I have no idea why.
I’ve also used this in non-food contexts to mean “kind”, e.g., The transactions on this table come in two flavors depending on what process created them….
That usage of “flavor” is pretty common in the IT world. I think it comes from the need to distinguish between different implementations of the same software environment; I first heard it in the context of “FreeBSD and Solaris are both flavors of Unix.”
Anybody know if physicists use this too? I know you can talk about particles having “color” and “spin,” even though everyone knows that the particles don’t really spin or have color as we know it in the macroworld. Don’t they sometimes talk about “flavors” too? Or am I conflating two flavors (software and physics) of geekitude?
Doesn’t *The New Yorker * still have a section called “Goings On About Town”? This usage may be a little stilted, but I think it’s far from dead.
Mr. Levins has morphed “fuckwad,” which is relatively common, I think, into “fuckball.”
And now “fuckball” is “ball of fuck.” Mainly because it sounds even worse and more bizarre. “You ball of fuck!”
He also uses “Motherhumper” instead of “motherfucker.” Not always, of course; it usually denotes fondness for whomever he’s calling a motherhumper.
I also say “Mother of God” as an expletive…which is not terribly original, of course, but no one I meet ever uses it until they start hanging around me, and then it catches on like fever. (I got it at age 12 from Gone With the Wind. I think Scarlett used it a few times.)
Reminds me of H.I. s co-worker in,“Raising Arizona” who was fond of the phrase, Motherscratcher.
In a more offensive vein, I picked up this little gem for referring to members of the fairer sex:Sperm burpin’ swamp whore!
It’s evolved into “Fucktard” now. At least in Everquest.
I use “Ack!” all the time.
Yes, quarks come in six flavors: up, down, strange, charm, bottom, and top.
What a coincidence; so do girlfriends. 
“No sex with fat chick for you!”
“Dude, that’s just crazy talk.”
“By (insert noun here) I mean (noun) NOT penis.” eg. “By Table I mean table, NOT penis.”
“Go you big red Fire Engine!”
“You know what you are? … Crazy like a dog!”
“Holy mother fuck me.”
"You think you’re so good, with your BEING, and you’re GOOD. Yeh, well you’re not. " (Often with a change of verbs and adjectives.)
“You know, my nipples taste like beer.”
That’s 'bout it.
Don’t really think anyone else would ever want to use them.
Cheers.
Engine.