Vinyl Turnip -
You forgot the part where I got in the mood by watching the homo-erotic wrestling match from Borat.
Mine go to eleven.
Regards,
Shodan
God, I love it when retarded people think they have outsmarted me.
**back·pedal (-ped′'l)
intransitive verb -·ped′·aled or -·ped′·alled, -·ped′·al·ing or -·ped′·al·ling
to press backward on the pedals of a bicycle, as to brake
☆ to move backward quickly, as in boxing to avoid blows
☆ to retract an earlier opinion**
Perhaps in the future, you should be sure of the meaning of words before you use them.
Well aware, retard, but thanks for posting. It is exactly what you did.
Please come away from the dark side, we appreciate good humor w/our white wine and cheese. 
It’s good that you’re well aware you’re retarded. It may not be the first step in a recovery, but it’s good to know yourself.
I’ll explain it one more time. For me to have backpedaled, I would have had
which I have not, in fact, done. My first post was hyperbole.
Now if you hurry, you might be able to catch Sesame Street and learn two more things today!
I think we all get it, Shodan and scumpup that you were both joking in this thread. What I think is in contention is that neither of you have conveyed your understanding that such behavior (as you have joked about) is inappropriate and may damage your relationship with your daughter and possible future son in law (I’m assuming that this behavior continues no matter who she dates).
Just an observation:
I can only go by what and how you post. I confess I am laughing a bit over here at Shodan’s description of himself because to me, he has always come across here as a Eustace Tilly type. I almost never go into gun or weight lifting threads, have never seen a karate one, but have sparred with Shodan in other, political threads. Since he seems to delight in splitting hairs, being pompous and mocking common civility with his “regards”, I always took him for a metrosexual, somewhat effeminate, fussy person. He probably is not laughing right now (maybe he is–I’d like to think he can see the ludicrousness of all this), but I am chuckling about the disparity between the image I have in his head and what he has posted here. I make no comment on his ability as a parent–that’s something no one can judge strictly by a message board. Scumpup I know even less about, so I can’t share any cognitive dissonance.
I understand that the chief critics of my parenting are people with no kids and, for one of them at least, knowledge only of bad parenting. None of them, nor you either, have given any convincing reason why their advice_however heartfelt_should be given any weight.
Thanks for your concern, but I did read the quote. I give a firm handshake to any joker I run across. If it’s somebody I know I’m going to be having future dealings with, I make an extra effort to let them know I’m all about business.
Just so you don’t think it’s all fathers & daughters, I can recall my mother once standing up in church and testifying* how proud she was that my eldest brother (her firstborn son) had been a virgin when he married.
My mother also forced me to go to a couple or three football games in high school so I could keep an eye on one of my sisters and protect her against–well, I don’t know. Ninjas.
Okay, that skeeves me…I do NOT want my parents thinking about whether or not I’m having sex.
The whole “protect your sister/daughter” motif seems a little ridiculous, too. At a football game, rape or date rape don’t seem likely. It seems more likely that your mom was afraid of what your sister would voluntarily do. There was another thread a while ago where the OP was upset that a good friend (female) who wanted to stay a virgin till marriage, etc. was spending the evening with a playboy seducer type, and “Oh no, she doesn’t know what his intentions are!” A lot of people got annoyed because short of rape, he can’t force her to have sex. So then it seems like the issue is really, “She’ll get talked into something she doesn’t want to do” which makes girls seem like delicate little flowers or “She’ll do something that I don’t want her to do,” which seems controlling.
Actually, I have three kids of my own, and you’re still an idiot. Look, I get that adolescent boys frustrate throughout your workday, and when you get a chance, you like to imagine a situation where you would be justified in hurting them, or scaring them shitless. But you should try not to post these things on the internet, because people aren’t quite going to believe you when you say “It was just a joke!” Especially if it’s not, you know, funny in any way.
I’m glad you have kids. That means they can take care of you instead of you having to live in the group home.
Well, if you do actually understand where I am joking, then you are correct - I do not understand that I am acting at all inappropriately towards my daughter or my daughter’s boyfriends.
The trouble might be that so many of those arguing against me tend to be posting stuff that amounts to “OMG!! Shodan is an active and involved parent, who wants his daughter’s dates to know that he values her well-being!! That’s a death threat!”
And like I said - I have seen no indication that my relationship with my daughter has suffered any damage based on my attitudes towards her boyfriends. Just the opposite, in fact - I mentioned upthread that she likes telling her dates that I am a black belt before they meet me. Maybe she’s just messing with them. Maybe she is doing what I do - making sure they know that someone is watching out for her, who it would not be safe to dismiss.
Maybe a bit of both.
Y’all are free to assume whatever you like. I guess I can wait until my daughter mentions or shows some kind of damage before I consider changing. Based on what ninnies some of y’all look like the rest of the time you post, I think I may be waiting for a while.
Nitpick: it’s judo, not karate.
Oh Judas - based on my complete lack of any fashion sense whatever, a “metro-sexual” is the last thing I would be called.
Actually, the outfits I choose when appearing in public in my daughter’s company are something that does cause her deep emotional scarring, to hear her tell it. She and my wife have waged a campaign over the last ten or a dozen years to upgrade my style. To date, their major triumph is that my socks generally match.
It has gotten a little overwrought, hasn’t it?
Too bad it was moved to the Pit. Maybe it would have gone better in another forum.
Regards,
Shodan
For additional skeeviness, consider these anecdotes:
-
When the Rhymers moved from our original home church to a much smaller one, with maybe 5 familes total, there was once a discussion during a church service about whether my youngest sister, who was then about 13 or so, should marry the pastor’s son, about the same age, when they reached maturity. I remember thinking at the time that I was going to have to do something criminal when the time came to prevent that from happening.
-
“Liz,” my not-quite-stepdaughter (I consider her kin but we’re not related by blood; but her mother had a child by me and we were never married) lives with me and Mrs. Rhymer. My father had a much bigger role in her upbringing than I did, as both I and her father were irresponsible shits in our 20s, and she calls him Granddaddy. Anyway, my dad recently met a fellow at church whom he wanted to introduce her to and we met him at a cousin’s church on Sunday and we had dinner afterwards. This fellow–I’ll call him Clark–was fairly polite and oh-so-very Christian–not in the cool Polycarp way, but in the batshit Rhymer-extended family way. Specifically, he mentioned that he was rather looking for a relationship in which he could play the role of Hosea to Gomer; that was the role God means for him, he thinks. (If you don’t feel like reading the link don’t know the story, Hosea is an Old Testatment character who was ordered by God to marry a harlot, or perhaps temple prostitute, named Gomer.) Clark seemed surprised that I found this idea, coupled with his interest in Liz, both insulting and vexsome.
Defensive much? It’s good advice. You have no control over your daughter’s sexuality or her choices. You can advise, you can try to persuade; you can support. It’s up to her.
I’m here as a critic of your posts in this thread, and I’m a parent and a female. I’ve been a 16 year old girl–as has catsix. That alone qualifies her to comment on this topic. The other poster, strassia, has been an adolescent male–again, qualification to comment.
I’ve dated randy ass boys and been dumped because I wouldn’t put out (ah, Ted was a class act). My dad wasn’t around when I was dating (divorce). My (older) brother was inappropriate with me re sex/intimacy (he wanted me to play strip poker with the varsity swim team–so much for the males of the family rallying around to protect their wimmin folk).
Believe me, I know about boys and how they “all” want one thing. I know what it is to have to fend off mashers in bars and be told I’m a frigid bitch because “I bought you dinner and you won’t sleep with me?” Trust me, there are few nasty scenarios that I have not found myself in by dating young men (I was never date raped, thank goodness).
NONE of these scenarios would have been remotely helped/halted by any father figure/father or my brother threatening to beat the shit out of any date of mine. The mashers and the moronic individual who thought that picking up the tab=sex tonight happened in college, far, far away from any possible beatdown. Ted was a classic Ron (see Dope thread) whom I was easily able to quash. I still dated. I dated and found guys who were polite and treated me with respect–imagine that, I did that all on my own, with no jailer at home, no body guard to proscribe limits on my sexuality and actions. I had sex too young (looking back), but there was no way it was any decision but mine. My reasons for doing so were complex, but make no mistake: I knew exactly what I was doing. Most girls are like me.
With this is the unacknowledged fact that just as many teenage girls as guys go seeking sexual experience. They can be very aggressive in this and sometimes it’s the boys who don’t want to participate. No boy seems to want to own up to that (those gender expectations can be a real bitch), but it’s true. The picture is never black and white. Your daughter (my daughter, any daughter) may well be the aggressor and the date may well be the one who resents the pressure. What then? And if said daughter wants to sidestep responsibility and blames the boy–what then?
Also, side note here: would anyone here want their son to be treated like this when they go to pick up a date? Joke all you want, but think on this: these kinds of jokes are vestigial bits of an outdated and useless set of behavior standards for the world today. The genii is out of the bottle re premarital sex and there is no putting it back in.
Catsix and strassia were once teens. How astute of you to figure that out. I bet you were a teen once, yourself. Now think carefully…do you suppose that I was never a teenager?
Having been a child is no qualification for being a parent. Since you have kids of your own, I’m sure you’re aware that parenting is strictly a learn-by-doing proposition. If catsix and strassia are certain that their parenting ideas are superior, they are certainly at liberty to have children and put their ideas into practice.
You, also, are at liberty to raise your kids however you see fit.
For my part, I decline to raise my child according to the dictates of childless strangers whom I’ve never met and whose real names I don’t even know.
Ok, then–well, you sure told me. You aren’t listening to any of us. Please yourself. I’ll leave you with this food for thought: do you really consider the rest of your gender to be scum when they are young? You seriously think men are scum til proven otherwise? If so, you live in a depressing world. I sincerely hope you do not think this way.
Shodan: I stand corrected on the judo. I abase myself at making such an egregious error and of course, that one detail changes everything…
And finally, I am not only tickled by the whole Shodan thing, but at **catsix **being decried for being a feminist here in this thread. From the ridiculous to the sublime–this thread has it all.
I am certain that you were never a 17 year old girl.
Because the only valid viewpoint regarding a father’s relationship with his teenage daughter, and whether or not it is accpetable to, however jokingly, make comments about using violence against young men to protect said daughter’s virtue and purity absolutely must come from a father?
I’ve never said I know what it’s like to have a kid or be a father. I certainly don’t and never will. I’ve only asked that you consider the possibility that your jokes may not be taken entirely in humor, and asked whether or not you want to risk that your daughter will respond to them as I (another daughter) did when my father made them.
I speak from the experience of the recipient, as a teenage girl myself, of such jokes. There is a possibility that your daughter will think it’s all funny and wonderful. And there’s a possibility that she won’t, and that no matter how close you two are now, that will change if her sense of humor regarding exploding cock rings doesn’t match yours.
If you think it’s worth gambling that on a stupid joke, then I wish you the best of luck. If it were me though, and my joke had the potential to hurt someone I love, I’d give up the joke.
“Sir, I’ve given you your library books… could you please let go of my hand now?”
I am a father, although not yet of teens, but that is irrelevant. I have never criticized your parenting. I have criticized your sense of humor and your perceptions of reality. Some of what I have said could be construed by Shodan as criticizing his parenting, although that was not my intent. Here, in toto, is my argument with you:
Jokes about offensive subjects can be expected to cause offense when they are indistinguishable from serious comments.
Your response seems to be that they are obviously jokes because (a)no one says that those things seriously, and (b)even if they do, you are a good parent.
To which my rebuttal is (a) I have heard them and seen them with my own eyes, and (b) how the hell would I know that? This is a message board. For all I know you are Larry the Cable guy or the demented ex-marine I know who is trying to find a legal chastity belt.
So please, back off your high horse about what a great parent you are, because it doesn’t matter to this discussion.
If you are going around applying the ol’ knucklecrusher to all and sundry, well that would make you an asshole. Do you also make sure they know that you lift weights and have a black belt? Is that part of how you show respect? No? Well, then maybe we are talking about different things here.
So, what is the point of the extra firm handshake?
Jonathan