Melin and ChrisCTP: I would not recommend using alcohol to make flying bearable. First of all, I think Marxxx’s fear is too deep-seated for a panacea to have any effect, and alcohol might make it worse. If he can’t get onto the concourse, he has a phobia, not a simple unwillingness to fly.
In Ruth Rendell’s most recent Inspector Wexford (Road Rage, a kidnapping victim is claustrophobic, and her captors exploit this. Wexford and his partner, Burden, are discussing phobias. Burden says, “I’m not too comfortable in the reptile house at the zoo.” Wexford says, “If you had a phobia you couldn’t go near the reptile house.”
Anyway, as regards alcohol, Mr. Rilch doesn’t like to fly, although he can make himself do it. Two years ago, we were flying Southwest during a snowstorm. I had a fifth of Evan Williams (bourbon whiskey, 90 proof, my personal favorite), and he convinced me to let him have some before we took off. I tried, but unfortunately not hard enough, to get him to take it easy, but he drank it the way he drinks Diet Pepsi. We were okay until our first stop, in Kansas City. We were parked on the runway for about an hour, during which time he turned the corner. Between the vomiting and the shouted ramblings, the cabin crew didn’t think he was very cute, but they didn’t threaten to throw us off. Mr. Rilch was the one who begged to be let off at the last minute, and I was the one who had to wheel him off the plane, after getting a well-meant lecture from the one sympathetic flight attendant, about how alcohol can make the experience worse. What was really embarrassing was having them think that he was this rampant alcoholic, and that I was the sap who enabled him. In fact, he doesn’t drink hard liquor; I’m the drinker, but I know way better than to chug whiskey like he was doing, and I know what to expect when one drinks, which he didn’t. Also, he left his glasses in the seat pocket, and he had to sleep on the cold airport floor for six hours until we could get another flight. If I hadn’t been able to get him to drink a half gallon of water, he probably wouldn’t be here.
Remember, I’m pulling for you; we’re all in this together.
—Red Green
Something else you might consider: Go to the nearest flying club, and sign up for a ‘familiarization flight’. They offer these to prospective student pilots or anyone else interested. Typically, these flights will last for maybe 30-45 minutes, and you’ll get a chance to actually fly the airplane. The instructor will take you through the whole procedure, explain what’s happening during the takeoff and landing, and let you fly the rest of the time.
I’ve known several people who had their fear of flying completely erased through this method - Once you’ve flown the airplane yourself you gain a better understanding for what’s going on.
You may even like it and go on to get a pilot’s license.
I hear hypnosis works wonders for this fear… In fact before you know it you are on a plane, putting other ppl at ease, that are shouting at the top of their lungs, “We are all gonna die!!” when your plane hits a little bit of turbulance.
They say the first step to overcoming a fear is to visualize yourself in the situation. I can’t even do that. Oh well…At least they aren’t gonna fire me. (knock wood)
Just remember: The pilot wants the plane to stay airborne just as much as you do. He’d be the first one “at the scene,” as it were, if there happened to be an accident.
A couple of major carriers have fearful flyer programs. I know Northwest and American do. You get to explore the inside of the plane, taxi around, and even take a short flight. You might even get to sample some of that scrumptious airline fare!
[[ For example the last time I tried my left arm went completely numb,
(like when it falls asleep), then my right arm, then my neck and all my
head went numb. I thought this must be a heart attack. And this was WITH
4 valiums in my system.]]
You got four valiums in your system and you think your phobia is what made your limbs go numb?
There are a number of websites and books addressing fear of flying, describing techniques that work for different people. There are also phobia specialists (psychologists, I think) you could go to. Looking at stats probably won’t help much, as you recognize on some level that it’s an unreasonable fear. Some airlines have programs to gradually desensitize people who fear flying. Good luck.
I have a fear of airplanes. It seems that I have this fear that if I get on an airplane, I will be trapped in an aluminum tunnel with bad air and a motormouth sitting half an inch from me for several hours. Yes, I know it’s far-fetched.
Seriously though, I used to think flying was the greatest thing when I was a kid. Now it gets me all freaked out - the airports as well as the planes. The noise builds as I fly. Flying alone is the worst.
I think this has been made worse by college - since I hated college and made eight flights a year to college (two round trips with one transfer each time), a large portion of the time I’ve spent in the air has been two or from college.
Markxxx - you’ve described me to a “T”. As an army brat we moved around quite a lot and I’ve been on anything from a Herc to a 6 seater sea plane (Goose). Didn’t give flying a second thought - fun even.
I’m now 36 and afraid to fly. Statistically I know flying is safe (safter to fly than to drive) yet I can’t convince myself of this.
About 5 months ago my employer indicated that I will be required to travel to England to assist our “branch” there (I live in Ontario, Canada). Well, I spent that entire weekend not sleeping and not eating. I eventually had to tell my boss that I could not make this trip. Since honesty is the best policy I gave the truth as my reason. He understood completely and said they would find someone else to make the trip. (PS as it turns out the trip was not necessary after all).
The last time I flew was about four years ago when my husband and I took a vacation to the Dominican Republic. The trip there wasn’t too bad, however, coming home we experienced a lot of turbulence. I couldn’t eat, couldn’t follow the movie and barely controled my hysteria (thanks to my husband to kept me busy with chit chat).
I’m wondering: why am I afraid to fly? What causes these kinds of feeling to develop? I should also note that I’m not a good passenger in a vehicle either. Much more relaxed as the driver.
Now I could see your husband’s chit-chat being annoying, but driving you to the edge of hysteria? Do you think you two should see a counsellor?
Sorry, I’m just trying to be funny.
If you like driving a car just fine, but hate riding in the car, maybe you’d benefit from one of the aforementioned programs that let you fly the plane? It might de-mystify the idea of flying.
Nothing I write about any person or group should be applied to a larger group.
