Fuck talking, at that age what grownups say tends to sound like “¦¦¦¦ ¦¦¦ ¦¦¦ ¦¦¦¦¦”; most grownups explain a lot more and talk a lot more than a kid (specially a first child) is ready to take in - and God, I swear some parents explain things more to their toddler than to each other*! It’s doing: make sure that you grab his hand more often than you really think you need to.
I’m glad you’re both ok.
My brother and his wife would talk to their toddler about the nutritional value of food. Dubya tee eff? Dude, just say “eat your greens”, don’t talk to the kid about fiber!
We had new neighbors move in across the street last week. As I was driving toward my home I noticed the new lady talking with another neighbor; there were two kids - obviously hers - running around playing. One, who is maybe 4 years old, ran part way into the street as I was approaching. I stopped as the mom yelled, “you come over here!” to the kid, then resumed her conversation.
Maybe now might be a good time to begin to explain to him the duties of a Big Brother? That is, helping protect the baby from danger. Sort of, in his eyes, changing it from parents vs him to him and parents vs the baby.
This incident doesn’t mean you’re a bad match for parenting. It’s means you’re human and fucked up because that’s what humans do. We fuck up. A lot, most of us. Thanks be, this won’t be the last time you fuck up with this little guy. He’s okay, and you’re going to have plenty more opportunities to get it wrong, and you’re going to take advantage of at least some of those opportunities no matter how hard you try not to. Be grateful you’re going to have more chances, then get out there and buy you a baby leash, maybe one that can clip onto the stroller or your belt loop.
Starryspice, I’m not a parent, so I can’t much comment on how is or is not the best way to act towards your kids. However, this section jumped out at me… If you’re crying and upset to the point that you don’t think you can sleep, repetitive thoughts on a topic (even valid thoughts!) that you’re having difficulty moving on to other thoughts… well, hormones can do dumb things to our bodies and our brains, and pregnancy is a prime time for hormones to do things. You may want to consider talking to your OB about a referral to someone who has experience in pre-natal anxiety. It could be that you just had a moment of anxiety. It could be that they have some literature or other info for tacking on a second kid.