Films (sequels mainly) that "do not exist"

[Greg_Charles]

@ArizonaTeach

You know what would be silly? More than one Jaws. I mean, seriously.

You don’t think it would be cool if other great whites, possibly members of the original’s family, executed a personal (sharkal?) vengeance against the Brody family, pursuing them if necessary over half the globe? You could even have marine biologist characters explaining how the whole premise is impossible, and yet it would happen anyway, thereby proving scientists are untrustworthy.

On second thought, you’re right. That would be idiotic.

[Charlie_Tan]

@Annie-Xmas

Remember Grease, with all those 30-somethings playing high school students who later graduated?

Well…
Travolta was 24
Olivia Newton-John was 30
Stockard Channing was indeed 34
Jeff Conaway was 28
Barry Pearl was 28
Michael Tucci was 32
Kelly Ward was 22
Didi Conn was 27
Jamie Donelly was 31
Dinah Manoff was 20

All a bit ripe to be teenagers, but hardly a cast of “all those 30-somethings”.

Just sayin’.

[Little_Nemo]

I think Disney deserves commendation. With their catalog of popular feature films it would have been easy for them to make a bunch of cheap rip-offs to release on videotape or as cable TV shows. Instead, they sought new and original ideas and characters for all their products and maintained their reputation for only putting out the highest quality.

[Khan]

@Malacandra

Talking of Star Trek, ISTR that the Romulans come from a twin-planet system? It would be really neat if there was a film about that - although they’d have to steer clear of ripping any ideas off from The Wrath of Khan, such as some godawful planet-destroying weapon or an heroic act of self-sacrifice from the one crew-member able to evaluate the situation utterly logically (after having made sure his consciousness was backed up, of course).

God. That’s a terrible idea. Did you mean it as a joke, or did you get it from some half-assed Trek fanfic on the internet? You should have thrown in something about the villain being a clone of Captain Picard; that’d have been the icing on the cake.

I’m glad that Paramount had the sense to keep Rick Berman from doing anything else with Star Trek. Imagine if they gave him the ok to do another TV series set before they formed the Federation where they made the Vulcans act like a bunch of bureaucratic dickheads? Yeesh.

On a related note, wouldn’t it be cool if George Lucas actually made those Star Wars prequels he’d been talking about? Apart from remastering the trilogy with THX in '95 and putting that on DVD about five years ago, he hasn’t done anything with the series in a while.

[Nava]

@OtakuLoki

While all these non-sequels are worth mentioning, I’d like to say that I’m glad no one’s tried to make a Starship Troopers movie, set to modern sensibilities, and ignoring much of the political underpinings of the book.

I’m not sure that the book could be faithfully transferred to the large screen, anyways, but at least there’s been no one making a movie that used the title then made a huge social commentary about fascism.

Quite. After all, some of its best parts are pretty-long speeches (which would just leave people glassy-eyed onscreen) and the relationships between genders. Mind you, if they ever make such a movie they’ll probably cast a Chinese actor as Rico, I doubt they’ll go through the effort to look for an actual Filipino.

I heard some rumours about a Hairspray remake but so far it doesn’t seem to be happening.

[bbs2k]

… but I sure hope Stephen King finishes the Dark Tower books before he dies.

[Malacandra]

@Khan

God. That’s a terrible idea. Did you mean it as a joke, or did you get it from some half-assed Trek fanfic on the internet? You should have thrown in something about the villain being a clone of Captain Picard; that’d have been the icing on the cake.

Eh, now you’re just being silly. That’s about as likely as Data suddenly turning out to have a retarded brother. :rolleyes: