Finally, the World Has a Giant, Shirtless Jeff Goldblum Statue

[Snowboarder_Bo]

[I figured this was waaaaaay too pointless for Cafe Society, but I had to share it](Finally, the World Has a Giant, Shirtless Jeff Goldblum Statue).

It’s been 25 years since that cinematic touchstone graced this world, and to commemorate it, London’s NOW TV has constructed one of the greatest artistic achievements of our time: A 25-foot statue of a half-naked Jeff Goldblum.

Goldblum hasn’t responded to the statue, and it’s unclear if he’s seen it yet—maybe he’s busy doing a photoshoot with a puppy or practicing piano or something—but we hope NOW TV keeps it up long enough for the real Jeff Goldblum to recreate the scene next to his 330-pound doppelgänger.

If the city of London has a lick of goddamn sense, it’ll keep the monument there for all eternity—maybe even consecrating it as a national landmark. Sure, Goldblum isn’t British, and no, Jurassic Park has nothing to do with England, but just look at that masterpiece: the fleshy bulb of the nipple, the furrows of the chest hair, the pinnacle of what a human face can be.

According to the rules of chaos theory, there’s a world out there in which this monument doesn’t exist. Thank God we don’t live in it.

[Maggie_the_Ocelot]

I approve.

[blondebear]

Your link appears to be broken–here’s the one from Getty Images.

Not a particularly good likeness IMO, but it looks like a fun opportunity for a wide range of selfies.

[Gatopescado]

Wow. Can’t un-see that.

What is that? Paper Mache?

[Novelty_Bobble]

Pointless, inappropriate, inaccurate and stupid.

I too approve!

[running_coach]

@blondebear

Your link appears to be broken–here’s the one from Getty Images.

Not a particularly good likeness IMO, but it looks like a fun opportunity for a wide range of selfies.

I think he’s looking mighty fly.

[Kent_Clark]

They made that when they could have madethis???

[Tapiotar]

@running_coach

I think he’s looking mighty fly.

There should be a lot more buzz about this.

[Gatopescado]

@Tapiotar

There should be a lot more buzz about this.

Don’t worry, Honey. When the Queen figures out this is the Bee’s Knees, people will comb around.

[burpo_the_wonder_mutt]

Isn’t London Bridge in Arizona?

[Gatopescado]

I heard it fell down.

[SanVito]

@burpo_the_wonder_mutt

Isn’t London Bridge in Arizona?

I hate that I’m this person, but that bridge in the picture is Tower Bridge.

London Bridge these days is a just a concrete slab of traffic.

[burpo_the_wonder_mutt]

@SanVito

I hate that I’m this person, but that bridge in the picture is Tower Bridge.

London Bridge these days is a just a concrete slab of traffic.

(bolding mine)

Not at all, SV, that’s why we’re here. Thanx for clearing up my confusion.

@Gatopescado

I heard it fell down.

…my fair Gato!

[Snowboarder_Bo]

Wow; I have no idea what happened to that link in the OP. Unfortunately, I posted that and then went to work, so I haven’t corrected the error until now.

Finally, the World Has a Giant, Shirtless Jeff Goldblum Statue

Sorry about that, folks.

[Northern_Piper]

sorry, I’m getting a 404 on that.

[burpo_the_wonder_mutt]

If I forget my mantra, can I get a big statue of me, too?

[Sir_T-Cups]

Sigh…I really do hate that man

[Sefton]

@Sir_T-Cups

Sigh…I really do hate that man

I hear you. It’s bad enough that he married Geena Davis, but now they’re erecting statues of him. And why? Because he’s pretty and he was in a movie with dinosaurs. Good grief.

[Doctor_Jackson]

@Gatopescado

I heard it fell down.

No, no - is falling down, and has been for well over 100 years. It’s taking longer than we thought…

[Northern_Piper]

“Build it up with
Slabs of concrete,
Slabs of concrete,
Slabs of concrete,
Build it up with
Slabs of concrete,
My fair lady!”